It’s Official: I Am An Embarrassment
The first week of being a school mum has passed. I must say I am still adjusting although Kahlil has this bizarre love of school despite knowing no one there. Any day that’s not a school day inspires the question, “How many more sleeps until I go back?” He is indeed the son of a teacher and all my positive feelings for learning have been passed on in his blood. Of course I must pay the price for having such cooperative offspring. I have already passed into the category of embarrassing for daring to kiss my son good bye in the classroom. It’s not that I didn’t anticipate the inevitable but after one week!? Were that not bad enough, I also enquired if the boy he chose to sit next to was his friend… they looked at me like teenagers who had just been asked if they’re fucking! Clearly, I have a lot to learn. Fortunately not all is lost. I have been assured that future displays of affection may possibly be condoned upon request; I suppose he is just trying to let me down gently.
Hamish has also survived his week of 3yo kinder. Indeed this may have been the more challenging of the two experiences. I hung around for the first session and watched one boy folded over in agonies of anxiety and another who simply fell asleep, overcome with emotional exhaustion. When I floated the idea of my leaving him alone at kinder he looked at me like that was a bad idea and indeed made realize how difficult that may from his perspective. When it came to it, this was not the key issue. He grunted disapprovingly when I bid him good bye but ultimately was too taken with a room full of new toys to get too carried away. I returned feeling quietly confident to be shattered to discover in the waiting foyer that the distressed cries of, “I want to cuddle Mummy! I want Mummy!!” were in fact from Hamish. I was informed by the teacher’s aide that he only cracked up when he was commanded to sit down upon the floor with the other kids. All the other kids willingly cope with this except my maverick son. I am not sure if the issue is sitting next to these strange children who he didn’t seem to mind playing next to or whether it was submitting to demands - the only things he was asked to do. Being the bloody minded, belligerent boy that he is…
I must confess to relenting in my PC parenting to allowing B to try fear tactics with him so frustrating his anarchic ways can be. Having watched “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” and noticing some disquiet, he found he was able to manipulate terror by singing, “Oopma loompa, dumpity do…” and using a piggy bank as a mask. I for my part, could not emulate the display not due to any misgivings on principle but because I couldn’t keep a straight face. The other day I did hear Hamish singing the Oompa Loompa song and has even sang it to B. He was even laughing when I imitated Hamish crying for his cuddles at kinder while telling Kahlil about the trials of his sibling. Well at least he can laugh at himself! Ask not if Hamish is ready for kinder but if kinder is ready for Hamish!
As for myself, I must relinquish my slack arse ways and submit to the treadmill of school demands and school schedules, stressing over suitable school lunches - healthy but not monotonous and in appropriate quantities, chasing after forgotten items like an art smock, reading the legions of bloody newsletters, chasing Kahlil down to do his homework, steeling myself for the fundraising demands and coping with the sudden accountability to the school of my son. School parenting is such a full time job these days! Indeed I miss the days of being beholden to no one and not expected to be anywhere except where I felt like. But still, I must say that Kahlil looks rather handsome in his uniform.
Through it all, I am starting to notice the school girls and kinder girls as this whole other universe starts to hold relevance. What of the future…
Hamish has also survived his week of 3yo kinder. Indeed this may have been the more challenging of the two experiences. I hung around for the first session and watched one boy folded over in agonies of anxiety and another who simply fell asleep, overcome with emotional exhaustion. When I floated the idea of my leaving him alone at kinder he looked at me like that was a bad idea and indeed made realize how difficult that may from his perspective. When it came to it, this was not the key issue. He grunted disapprovingly when I bid him good bye but ultimately was too taken with a room full of new toys to get too carried away. I returned feeling quietly confident to be shattered to discover in the waiting foyer that the distressed cries of, “I want to cuddle Mummy! I want Mummy!!” were in fact from Hamish. I was informed by the teacher’s aide that he only cracked up when he was commanded to sit down upon the floor with the other kids. All the other kids willingly cope with this except my maverick son. I am not sure if the issue is sitting next to these strange children who he didn’t seem to mind playing next to or whether it was submitting to demands - the only things he was asked to do. Being the bloody minded, belligerent boy that he is…
I must confess to relenting in my PC parenting to allowing B to try fear tactics with him so frustrating his anarchic ways can be. Having watched “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” and noticing some disquiet, he found he was able to manipulate terror by singing, “Oopma loompa, dumpity do…” and using a piggy bank as a mask. I for my part, could not emulate the display not due to any misgivings on principle but because I couldn’t keep a straight face. The other day I did hear Hamish singing the Oompa Loompa song and has even sang it to B. He was even laughing when I imitated Hamish crying for his cuddles at kinder while telling Kahlil about the trials of his sibling. Well at least he can laugh at himself! Ask not if Hamish is ready for kinder but if kinder is ready for Hamish!
As for myself, I must relinquish my slack arse ways and submit to the treadmill of school demands and school schedules, stressing over suitable school lunches - healthy but not monotonous and in appropriate quantities, chasing after forgotten items like an art smock, reading the legions of bloody newsletters, chasing Kahlil down to do his homework, steeling myself for the fundraising demands and coping with the sudden accountability to the school of my son. School parenting is such a full time job these days! Indeed I miss the days of being beholden to no one and not expected to be anywhere except where I felt like. But still, I must say that Kahlil looks rather handsome in his uniform.
Through it all, I am starting to notice the school girls and kinder girls as this whole other universe starts to hold relevance. What of the future…