Long year end update.
Well i am in a Open polyamorus relationship with Sally and Adam. Now i know people use these words differantly so i am going to define them and what they mean to me. First Polyamorus: literaly translates to multiple love. that is what i take it to mean, It is just like a loveing commited Monogamus relationship except there are multiple people. Not all members of a Poly relationship must sleep with all others, however all members must be commited to lovingly supporting everry other member of the relationship. everyone loves everyone else. Love doesn't equal sex.
Open when the members of a relationship have an agreement that makes sex, flirting, and developing relationships with (an)other(s) ok. That is right other relationships are not cheating.
Now this is not inherant in the definition but to me and mine honesty is important. Anyone additional in my case needs to know i have commitment somewhere else as well and we will have to work out what kind of commimint we have.
Mostly I am writing this because i am a little afraid of it. There are folks on my friends list that i have crushes on and i didn't want to scare them off,but then if honesty scares them off things were going nowhere any way.
mostly i am posting this because i am working through things that relate directly and i am tired of feeling like i cant use this outlet.
So now one of the over arcing issues i have is the idea that i could find someone on the side and that i would have to tell them what they might hear as, i care about you and want to have sex with you, but i don't care about you as much as these people over here. or you get second place.
next topic
I went to visit my Mom and sister. The drive there was terrible. it was icey the whole way. we went 30 the whole way. we probably should have stoped but then we would have missed christmas. Plus my sister (Who has had a pertty ruff life and has aids) was smoking meth the whole way. Funny i was wondering how we were making a 25 hour drive in one shot with one driver. Now she doesn't get tweeked out, she has neropathy, the stimulant helps the nerves work. she does a little to get the effect she wants and puts it down. This hits me weird because she is using a drug that is BAD in my book, but she is not using it badly. all i can say is it is a thing i choose to be over there and not be a part of our relationship.
Mom had some troubles with Lee her husband and lives with Sis now. She is depressed and upset, and she is on oxygen and pills and inhalers 4 times a day, sits in her room and watches TV. i love her so much and she has degreded physicaly and emotionaly to the point that she is not recognizable as the woman who raised me. but i still love her it just makes me sad, very sad.
And best still
I Quit Smoking. this shit is hard. other than the fact that they are full of shit, i have alot of respect for folks it is easy for. but i Quit i am a non-smoker. i did it a succseded as of then and i quit.
I am really proud of myself so sorry if that was obnoxious.
Love you all
Bright Blessings for a brand new year with wonderful thinngs around the corner.
Open when the members of a relationship have an agreement that makes sex, flirting, and developing relationships with (an)other(s) ok. That is right other relationships are not cheating.
Now this is not inherant in the definition but to me and mine honesty is important. Anyone additional in my case needs to know i have commitment somewhere else as well and we will have to work out what kind of commimint we have.
Mostly I am writing this because i am a little afraid of it. There are folks on my friends list that i have crushes on and i didn't want to scare them off,but then if honesty scares them off things were going nowhere any way.
mostly i am posting this because i am working through things that relate directly and i am tired of feeling like i cant use this outlet.
So now one of the over arcing issues i have is the idea that i could find someone on the side and that i would have to tell them what they might hear as, i care about you and want to have sex with you, but i don't care about you as much as these people over here. or you get second place.
next topic
I went to visit my Mom and sister. The drive there was terrible. it was icey the whole way. we went 30 the whole way. we probably should have stoped but then we would have missed christmas. Plus my sister (Who has had a pertty ruff life and has aids) was smoking meth the whole way. Funny i was wondering how we were making a 25 hour drive in one shot with one driver. Now she doesn't get tweeked out, she has neropathy, the stimulant helps the nerves work. she does a little to get the effect she wants and puts it down. This hits me weird because she is using a drug that is BAD in my book, but she is not using it badly. all i can say is it is a thing i choose to be over there and not be a part of our relationship.
Mom had some troubles with Lee her husband and lives with Sis now. She is depressed and upset, and she is on oxygen and pills and inhalers 4 times a day, sits in her room and watches TV. i love her so much and she has degreded physicaly and emotionaly to the point that she is not recognizable as the woman who raised me. but i still love her it just makes me sad, very sad.
And best still
I Quit Smoking. this shit is hard. other than the fact that they are full of shit, i have alot of respect for folks it is easy for. but i Quit i am a non-smoker. i did it a succseded as of then and i quit.
I am really proud of myself so sorry if that was obnoxious.
Love you all
Bright Blessings for a brand new year with wonderful thinngs around the corner.