who needs sleep when we've got love
Title: who needs sleep when we've got love
Characters: Nate/Serena
Rating/Word Count: PG/1480
One-Line Excerpt: Serena listens to his voice, lets it seep through the phone and settle onto her skin, can't ignore the tingly feeling she gets whenever anything Nate comes up.
ten.
Blair's sleeping soundly, eye mask covering most of her face and body curled into Serena.
Serena eyes her carefully, hand cupped around the phone in her palm and a smile on her face.
"Yeah, she's asleep."
Down the street and over a couple blocks, Nate sits in his bed by himself.
"You should be quiet. She gets cranky if she doesn't sleep enough you know."
Serena giggles, before clamping a hand over her mouth and murmuring oopsies through her fingers.
"Serenaaaa, I'm sleepy."
If she tries hard enough, she can picture him in his room, tucked into hunter green flannel sheets and rubbing his eyes like he's a baby or something. She thinks it's adorable.
"Natie, I can't sleep. Just talk to me ok? Please?"
He sighs into the phone, and starts a conversation about the sailing trip he's going to take with his dad in a couple weeks, once school is over.
Somewhere, in between the talk of starboard and ports and mastheads, her eyelids grow heavy and her breathing even heavier.
"Rena?" He says, because he's too tired to make his mouth form the whole word, he's barely awake himself and it's only because she asked him to be.
"Mmmhmm?" is all she can manage, the phone pressed tighter to her ear than ever and halfway caught between a dream and reality.
"Love you lots."
She smiles, as lazily as she ever has, tries to say love you back but she's never really sure if it made it through the phone, through the distance, through the half-sleeps they're both trapped in.
fifteen.
The phone wakes Nate up at three in the morning, Snoop Dogg rapping Drop It Like It's Hot right into his ear.
He reaches up to grab it, flips it open and grumbles a messy hello? into the speaker.
"Naaaatie."
Nate almost sits straight up in bed from shock.
"Serena? What's wrong? Are you ok?"
He can tell by the way she sighs and the voices in the background that she's drunk. Drunk, and out, and probably all over some guy.
The thought makes him clench his fists in jealousy.
"No," she says in her pouty voice. "No, because I miss you. And that's not allowed."
She blows her breath up into her hair, bites down on her bottom lip to stop herself from crying.
Nate's not sure what to say, just runs a hand through his hair and tries to keep breathing.
"Bye Natie," she whispers, and hangs up the phone quickly.
He flops back on his bed, spread-eagle; dreams of her legs her hair her eyes her skin pressed close enough so he can breathe her in.
sixteen.
Serena's sitting with Dan at some ethnic restaurant that he loves when her phones starts vibrating against her leg.
She presses a messy kiss to the side of his cheek, promises she won't be long and knows she's already been granted forgiveness, before ducking outside and checking who's calling.
Natie A.
It makes her heart ache, in the bad kind of way, the boarding school days kind of way, because she hasn't really talked to him in forever and god he's still just as perfect and unattainable as he was when she left.
"Hello?" she answers nervously, smiling in spite of herself because it's Nate.
"Rena?"" he half says, half yells.
Her old nickname erases some of the nerves; she leans against the wall and tilts her head towards the phone.
"Hi Natie."
"Don't Natie me! 'S not fair, 's too cute."
She knows exactly what he looks like, silly beautiful drunk and stubborn Nate with his eyebrows knitted, arms crossed tight across his chest and his eyes bluer than ever.
"Nate, are you ok?" and this is said softer, more carefully because she doesn't know where this is going.
"I'm with Chuck! But not you. Nope, not you because you left Rena. You just left. And you took my shirt! That was a nice shirt you know, and I don't think I ever got it back. Lots of girls want my shirt. To keep!"
Serena doesn't know why her eyes are tearing up, fingertips pressed to her glossy lips because she doesn't know what to say.
"Dan probably has terrible shirts," Nate mopes, and Serena doesn't know if she should laugh or cry.
"Dan has some nice shirts," comes spilling out of her mouth before she can help it, regrets it almost the second the words travel across the airwaves.
"Rena, I'm not actually talking about shirts."
It sounds like he's scolding her, but she can't respond because he hangs out immediately.
She takes some deep breaths, steadies herself on suddenly shaky legs, and walks back into the restaurant.
eighteen.
"Love you Serena."
"Love you too, Nate."
She's sitting on Blair's bed, curled up in blankets and one of his old t-shirts. He left about an hour ago, and she realizes that she really really misses him already, the heavy warm weight of his arm across her stomach and the slow intense way he kisses her now.
For a few seconds, they're just breathing into the phone, until Serena's laugh breaks through the silence.
"Are you going to make me say it?"
He laughs back, replies with a confident, "Say what?" but Serena can hear his smile through the line.
"I can't believe we're this couple."
"I think it's cute."
"You would. You're the perfect boyfriend."
"Say it, Serena."
She rests her head in the palm of her hand, looks around and murmurs quickly into the phone, "You hang up first."
"No, you hang up first."
"You hang up."
"Ok, fine I will."
"Fine, do it."
When she does, Nate can't help being surprised. He smiles, shaking his head, and hits redial.
eighteen and a half.
The phone rings at nine, and Nate answers, expecting Dan.
"Hello?"
Serena listens to his voice, lets it seep through the phone and settle onto her skin, can't ignore the tingly feeling she gets whenever anything Nate comes up.
She freezes- doesn't know what to say because she doesn't even know how they ended up here.
Nate waits on the other end, tells himself he's going to hang up in five seconds if she doesn't say anything and then changes it to ten, feels a rush of relief when she finally speaks around eight.
"I'm- I'm sorry Nate. I wanted to fix me, fix us, and instead I just made a bigger mess of everything. I'm just nervous that maybe," be strong she tells herself in order to finish the sentence, "maybe you won't like me once I figure out who I am."
The silence is deafening.
The sentence makes Nate furious.
It seems a little ridiculous, even for Serena, that she wouldn't know how much he adores her by now. Loves every mess she makes and every smile she shoots his way, loves the parts of herself that she hates, loves her so much that he lets her trample over his heart over and over and over again, only to let it happen one more time.
"Serena, you're one of the only things I'll always love."
He hears the sharp intake of breath and wonders if he scared her off, gets frustrated at the thought that loving her right just makes her leave.
Serena leans her head against the window in her hotel room. Paris looks a lot lonelier by yourself, she decides.
"Thank you, Nate."
"That's what I'm here for," he manages even though it kills him.
If two hearts break on two separate continents in two lonely rooms, does anyone notice? Serena thinks bitterly before whispering a good night and crawling into her bed.
nineteen.
"I hate Juliet," she scowls into the phone one night.
It's late; she's drinking wine and eating pasta by herself. Blair's out somewhere doing Blair things.
Nate tiptoes out of his room, out of Juliet's earshot, and sighs impatiently.
"Serena, that's not fair."
What's underneath it all is this: that he'd give Juliet up in a second if Serena would just love him back for real already, would stop kissing other boys and running away when things get real.
"I know," she states sullenly.
Nate hangs up first.
twenty-two.
"I'll be home in twenty ok?"
"Sounds good, dinner's coming in fifteen so it'll be waiting for you."
Serena's rushing around the apartment, fluffing a pillow here and straightening a picture there. Domesticity fits her just as well as her favorite J Brand jeans, she learned.
Nate, on his way back from his City Hall internship, watches the city pass by from behind his tinted windows and lets this overbearing, delightfully happy feeling wash over him.
"Rena?"
"Mmhmm?" she says absentmindedly, looking out the window onto Fifth Avenue.
"Love you lots."
The words still make her smile, shyly bite down on her bottom lip and this is the closest to perfect she'll ever get, she's sure of it.
"Love you back."
Characters: Nate/Serena
Rating/Word Count: PG/1480
One-Line Excerpt: Serena listens to his voice, lets it seep through the phone and settle onto her skin, can't ignore the tingly feeling she gets whenever anything Nate comes up.
ten.
Blair's sleeping soundly, eye mask covering most of her face and body curled into Serena.
Serena eyes her carefully, hand cupped around the phone in her palm and a smile on her face.
"Yeah, she's asleep."
Down the street and over a couple blocks, Nate sits in his bed by himself.
"You should be quiet. She gets cranky if she doesn't sleep enough you know."
Serena giggles, before clamping a hand over her mouth and murmuring oopsies through her fingers.
"Serenaaaa, I'm sleepy."
If she tries hard enough, she can picture him in his room, tucked into hunter green flannel sheets and rubbing his eyes like he's a baby or something. She thinks it's adorable.
"Natie, I can't sleep. Just talk to me ok? Please?"
He sighs into the phone, and starts a conversation about the sailing trip he's going to take with his dad in a couple weeks, once school is over.
Somewhere, in between the talk of starboard and ports and mastheads, her eyelids grow heavy and her breathing even heavier.
"Rena?" He says, because he's too tired to make his mouth form the whole word, he's barely awake himself and it's only because she asked him to be.
"Mmmhmm?" is all she can manage, the phone pressed tighter to her ear than ever and halfway caught between a dream and reality.
"Love you lots."
She smiles, as lazily as she ever has, tries to say love you back but she's never really sure if it made it through the phone, through the distance, through the half-sleeps they're both trapped in.
fifteen.
The phone wakes Nate up at three in the morning, Snoop Dogg rapping Drop It Like It's Hot right into his ear.
He reaches up to grab it, flips it open and grumbles a messy hello? into the speaker.
"Naaaatie."
Nate almost sits straight up in bed from shock.
"Serena? What's wrong? Are you ok?"
He can tell by the way she sighs and the voices in the background that she's drunk. Drunk, and out, and probably all over some guy.
The thought makes him clench his fists in jealousy.
"No," she says in her pouty voice. "No, because I miss you. And that's not allowed."
She blows her breath up into her hair, bites down on her bottom lip to stop herself from crying.
Nate's not sure what to say, just runs a hand through his hair and tries to keep breathing.
"Bye Natie," she whispers, and hangs up the phone quickly.
He flops back on his bed, spread-eagle; dreams of her legs her hair her eyes her skin pressed close enough so he can breathe her in.
sixteen.
Serena's sitting with Dan at some ethnic restaurant that he loves when her phones starts vibrating against her leg.
She presses a messy kiss to the side of his cheek, promises she won't be long and knows she's already been granted forgiveness, before ducking outside and checking who's calling.
Natie A.
It makes her heart ache, in the bad kind of way, the boarding school days kind of way, because she hasn't really talked to him in forever and god he's still just as perfect and unattainable as he was when she left.
"Hello?" she answers nervously, smiling in spite of herself because it's Nate.
"Rena?"" he half says, half yells.
Her old nickname erases some of the nerves; she leans against the wall and tilts her head towards the phone.
"Hi Natie."
"Don't Natie me! 'S not fair, 's too cute."
She knows exactly what he looks like, silly beautiful drunk and stubborn Nate with his eyebrows knitted, arms crossed tight across his chest and his eyes bluer than ever.
"Nate, are you ok?" and this is said softer, more carefully because she doesn't know where this is going.
"I'm with Chuck! But not you. Nope, not you because you left Rena. You just left. And you took my shirt! That was a nice shirt you know, and I don't think I ever got it back. Lots of girls want my shirt. To keep!"
Serena doesn't know why her eyes are tearing up, fingertips pressed to her glossy lips because she doesn't know what to say.
"Dan probably has terrible shirts," Nate mopes, and Serena doesn't know if she should laugh or cry.
"Dan has some nice shirts," comes spilling out of her mouth before she can help it, regrets it almost the second the words travel across the airwaves.
"Rena, I'm not actually talking about shirts."
It sounds like he's scolding her, but she can't respond because he hangs out immediately.
She takes some deep breaths, steadies herself on suddenly shaky legs, and walks back into the restaurant.
eighteen.
"Love you Serena."
"Love you too, Nate."
She's sitting on Blair's bed, curled up in blankets and one of his old t-shirts. He left about an hour ago, and she realizes that she really really misses him already, the heavy warm weight of his arm across her stomach and the slow intense way he kisses her now.
For a few seconds, they're just breathing into the phone, until Serena's laugh breaks through the silence.
"Are you going to make me say it?"
He laughs back, replies with a confident, "Say what?" but Serena can hear his smile through the line.
"I can't believe we're this couple."
"I think it's cute."
"You would. You're the perfect boyfriend."
"Say it, Serena."
She rests her head in the palm of her hand, looks around and murmurs quickly into the phone, "You hang up first."
"No, you hang up first."
"You hang up."
"Ok, fine I will."
"Fine, do it."
When she does, Nate can't help being surprised. He smiles, shaking his head, and hits redial.
eighteen and a half.
The phone rings at nine, and Nate answers, expecting Dan.
"Hello?"
Serena listens to his voice, lets it seep through the phone and settle onto her skin, can't ignore the tingly feeling she gets whenever anything Nate comes up.
She freezes- doesn't know what to say because she doesn't even know how they ended up here.
Nate waits on the other end, tells himself he's going to hang up in five seconds if she doesn't say anything and then changes it to ten, feels a rush of relief when she finally speaks around eight.
"I'm- I'm sorry Nate. I wanted to fix me, fix us, and instead I just made a bigger mess of everything. I'm just nervous that maybe," be strong she tells herself in order to finish the sentence, "maybe you won't like me once I figure out who I am."
The silence is deafening.
The sentence makes Nate furious.
It seems a little ridiculous, even for Serena, that she wouldn't know how much he adores her by now. Loves every mess she makes and every smile she shoots his way, loves the parts of herself that she hates, loves her so much that he lets her trample over his heart over and over and over again, only to let it happen one more time.
"Serena, you're one of the only things I'll always love."
He hears the sharp intake of breath and wonders if he scared her off, gets frustrated at the thought that loving her right just makes her leave.
Serena leans her head against the window in her hotel room. Paris looks a lot lonelier by yourself, she decides.
"Thank you, Nate."
"That's what I'm here for," he manages even though it kills him.
If two hearts break on two separate continents in two lonely rooms, does anyone notice? Serena thinks bitterly before whispering a good night and crawling into her bed.
nineteen.
"I hate Juliet," she scowls into the phone one night.
It's late; she's drinking wine and eating pasta by herself. Blair's out somewhere doing Blair things.
Nate tiptoes out of his room, out of Juliet's earshot, and sighs impatiently.
"Serena, that's not fair."
What's underneath it all is this: that he'd give Juliet up in a second if Serena would just love him back for real already, would stop kissing other boys and running away when things get real.
"I know," she states sullenly.
Nate hangs up first.
twenty-two.
"I'll be home in twenty ok?"
"Sounds good, dinner's coming in fifteen so it'll be waiting for you."
Serena's rushing around the apartment, fluffing a pillow here and straightening a picture there. Domesticity fits her just as well as her favorite J Brand jeans, she learned.
Nate, on his way back from his City Hall internship, watches the city pass by from behind his tinted windows and lets this overbearing, delightfully happy feeling wash over him.
"Rena?"
"Mmhmm?" she says absentmindedly, looking out the window onto Fifth Avenue.
"Love you lots."
The words still make her smile, shyly bite down on her bottom lip and this is the closest to perfect she'll ever get, she's sure of it.
"Love you back."