Like a Moth to a Flame
Title: Like a Moth to a Flame
Characters: Blair/Serena
Rating/Word Count: R/2,170
One-Line Excerpt: Serena takes things that aren't hers. It's what she's always done.
"You're in my bed."
Serena looks up and sees Blair walking into the room, looks her best friend up and down.
"You're barefoot."
"Hardly as shocking," Blair says, rolling her eyes as she sits at the edge of her bed. Serena raises her brow, puckers her lips disbelievingly, and Blair rolls her eyes. "They're new. They pinch my toes. I took them off at the door. Dorota is taking them to be stretched."
"How sensible," Serena murmurs, picking at the tie of the silk robe she's got on. "I borrowed this."
"I can see that," Blair says, almost laughing. "Why, exactly, are you in my bed?"
Serena shrugs one shoulder and looks down again. "No one else's bed to be in."
Blair laughs out loud and tilts her head. "Really, S? You expect me to believe that statement coming from you, of all people?" Serena just blinks. "Carter, Nate, Dan. Let's see, who else have you had in your harem in the last few months?"
"It's not like that." She sounds sad, resigned to some kind of loveless life, and Blair doesn't buy it for a second. Something else has happened.
"Well, we all know which of the three I'd chose for you if it were up to me," Blair insists, smoothing a hand over the front of her skirt. "Carter is a terrible choice, unreliable. Dan is...Well, we both know my opinions on that, so I'll save my breath. Nate is the only suitable man for you."
Serena looks up, thinks about it for a moment. Blair might be right, but it doesn't change anything. The same might have been true since they were children, but things are different now, harder, and it's not as easy as Blair bossing them around and reminding them that she always gets her way.
Serena wishes, sometimes, that it was.
"Well, Nate is the one showing the least interest," Serena says quietly.
Blair rolls her eyes, crawls up the bed and leans against the headboard like Serena. This melancholy makes a lot more sense. Serena really only ever acts like this when there's something to do with Nate. "Men are idiots."
Serena laughs and nods. "They are."
"The only man a girl can trust is her daddy," Blair recites. They look at one another after a moment, then both start to laugh.
Serena ends up laying sideways across the bed with her head on Blair's thigh. Blair runs her hand through Serena's hair like they've always done for one another when things get like this, too painful or too hard to handle. They're there for one another no matter what. Like right now, Blair is supposed to be going to Chuck's. It's not a date, really, she just said she was going over to spend the evening with him. They aren't back to normal yet, but they've been spending time with one another, talking, trying to shed the 'toxic' label their relationship has always had. She's not going to leave Serena to go drink a martini with him and talk about their respective days.
"I just want who I want, and I want him to want me," Serena insists. She looks up at Blair, and Blair gives a half smile. Her hand moves from Serena's hair to play with the tie of her robe.
"It would be easier that way," Blair says quietly. "Less interesting, though. Kissing frogs is half the fun, isn't it?"
Serena laughs and shakes her head, moving a little so her head rests against Blair's stomach. "Says the girl who's had, like, two frogs."
"That's not fair!" Blair laughs.
Her hand is idly tugging at Serena's robe while they both giggle, and it feels like they're 13 again. Only if they were 13, it would have been Blair complaining about Nate and Serena talking about whomever it was she was into that week. It's interesting, Blair thinks, how they're both in these situations that have left their hearts hurting, and years later, they're still in exactly the same room, exactly the same position.
"I love you, you know," she says out of nowhere.
Serena opens her eyes and smiles at her best friend. She knows. Sometimes it's still nice to hear the words. It's always nice to hear the words.
"I know," she whispers. "Love you, too."
Blair unties Serena's robe and the fabric falls aside, showing what she has underneath. "You're wearing my nightgown?"
Serena giggles and runs her hand over her breast and down to her stomach. "I told you. I borrowed it." Blair rolls her eyes and shakes her head. Her hand comes to rest on Serena's and their fingers twine together. "It's kind of short."
"Can't be any shorter than the rest of the things you wear," Blair teases.
"Better than this," Serena says, plucking at the front of Blair's shirt. "What are you, a lawyer or something?"
Blair grins. "Not yet." Serena rolls her eyes. "I like this top."
"It's pretty," Serena agrees. She reaches up and undoes the top button. Blair does nothing, so Serena undoes another one. "Oh, my god. You matched your bra to your skirt?" She laughs hard and looks at Blair's face. Her cheeks are a little pink. "You're too cute, Blair. You need to be less cute."
"I like being cute," Blair pouts. Serena laughs some more and Blair doesn't stop her when she unbuttons the shirt the rest of the way. She finds her own hand moving up Serena's stomach just slightly. She doesn't know when they stopped holding hands. "You need to stop stealing my things."
Serena shrugs, and Blair finds herself staring at the line of her friend's collarbone, the curve of her breast. "Been doing it all my life."
There's something sad to it, like it goes past clothes and bedrooms and silly things like lip gloss or hair bands. It goes to affections and boys and just about anything Blair has wanted. They both know there are no hard feelings there anymore.
But they both know that Serena takes things that aren't hers. It's what she's always done.
"Exactly." Serena sits up, the robe falling off her shoulders until she shrugs it off completely and tosses it to the end of the bed.
Blair tells herself this isn't anything. They're just talking. There's nothing happening here that should be questioned.
Then Serena's hand is slipping under the open fabric of Blair's shirt to rest on her waist, and Blair realizes she's got her hand on Serena's thigh, just beneath the fabric of the silk slip she's wearing.
"Serena..." The blonde smiles, so Blair stops talking. When Serena's thumb grazes the underside of her breast through her bra, Blair sucks in a breath and their eyes meet.
"Men are idiots," Serena says.
Blair bites her bottom lip, and Serena moves closer. They've kissed before, enough times that Serena knows how Blair tastes. They french kissed once, on a dare, and it hasn't happened in years, and they've never done it like this, sober and in the quiet and with Serena in lingerie and Blair with her shirt unbuttoned. Still, all Serena can see right now that her best friend is beautiful, and brave, and they love one another, and she wants to kiss her. She places her free hand on Blair's cheek, leans forward on her knees, and presses their lips together.
Blair kisses back. She doesn't know why, just that Serena feels nice, soft, and sweet, and different than Chuck, who was the last person she kissed, the person she's kissed most in her life. Serena moves one of her knees to the other side of Blair's body so she's straddling her lap. Blair realizes her hand is dangerously close to her best friend's behind, skin on skin, her fingertips grazing the elastic of Serena's panties.
"S," she whispers. Thinking of Chuck just now reminded her of everything. Everything, like the fact that she's sort of got a boyfriend (or whatever it is she and Chuck can classify themselves as) and Serena is in love with someone else.
"Do you want to?" Serena asks, a little breathless.
Blair doesn't know what that implies, but she looks into Serena's eyes, so blue, and feels the warm palm on the side of her neck, the thumb running over the soft, sensitive skin below her ear, and she thinks the answer is yes. She's barely nodded once and they're kissing again. It's still soft, testing, like they're not really sure what to do with one another, if they should do anything. Blair isn't a fool. She's always assumed Serena had perhaps 'experimented' with this kind of thing before. If she's being honest, this isn't the first time she's thought about it. It seems no one is immune to Serena's charm and beauty and whatever that intangible thing is she possesses.
"Have you ever...before?" she asks, because she feels she needs to know. Serena sits back on Blair's legs and it almost hurts, but she's too nervous to ask her to move. The blonde shakes her head and Blair finds herself smiling.
Serena hooks her finger into the front of Blair's bra and pulls her forward, then pushes the shirt off Blair's arms. "We can be each others' first," she says, and they both giggle a little before kissing again.
Serena moves after a while and lays on her back on the bed. She smiles when Blair looks down at her, confused and maybe annoyed. She's itching to pull this nightgown over her head, but she doesn't really know how far either of them are willing to take this (even though neither of them are virgins, not by a long shot). This really does feel that way, though, the first time for something you're not sure you're ready for. Blair lays down, too, and Serena reaches back and slides down the zipper of Blair's skirt, pushing at the fabric a little bit. It's not like they haven't seen one another naked before. Just not when they're each wearing the same two kinds of lip gloss and their cheeks are flushed.
Blair pushes her skirt off her hips and laughs when Serena is right there, hooking her fingers into the waistband of Blair's stockings and pulling them down her legs. She lays down on top of Blair afterward, shifting until their bodies feel comfortable against one another. She nips at Blair's lips again, feels her friend pulling up the fabric of the nightgown until it's at her waist and Blair's hands are on her hips.
"We're almost naked," Serena says, her hand warm on Blair's side.
"I thought that was the idea," Blair says, sounding just a little annoyed.
Serena smiles. She always knew Blair would be impatient like that with regards to sex. "Is it still the idea?"
Blair feels a little daring, maybe feeling that thing men do, accomplishment over being like this with Serena van der Woodsen, and reaches between them, touches Serena through her panties. Serena's back arches and she rolls her hips.
"Yes," Blair says needlessly, right before Serena's lips descend onto hers again.
After they've shed the rest of their clothes and she's got one hand in Serena's hair, the other clutching at the sheets as Serena kisses her between her thighs, Blair stops thinking of ways to justify all this. It's just happening, and it's amazing, and oh, it's true that no one knows you like your best friend does.
... ... ...
Serena's cheeks are pink and she's laying beneath the covers, still completely undressed and holding her best friend's hand. They're giggling, still on a high from what they just did, still both a little in shock, still both sated.
"The door's open," Serena notes, sending them into fits of laughter again. She lays her head against Blair's collarbone, her her leg over the brunette's hip.
"I stood Chuck up. It's a good thing he didn't come looking for me."
Serena pulls away and grins. Blair doesn't know if she should trust that look, but she trusts Serena inherently, so she doesn't ask questions. "We'll invite him next time."
If there wasn't a hand trailing down her stomach and then fingertips ghosting over the inside of her thigh, Blair would insist there's not going to be a next time.
Characters: Blair/Serena
Rating/Word Count: R/2,170
One-Line Excerpt: Serena takes things that aren't hers. It's what she's always done.
"You're in my bed."
Serena looks up and sees Blair walking into the room, looks her best friend up and down.
"You're barefoot."
"Hardly as shocking," Blair says, rolling her eyes as she sits at the edge of her bed. Serena raises her brow, puckers her lips disbelievingly, and Blair rolls her eyes. "They're new. They pinch my toes. I took them off at the door. Dorota is taking them to be stretched."
"How sensible," Serena murmurs, picking at the tie of the silk robe she's got on. "I borrowed this."
"I can see that," Blair says, almost laughing. "Why, exactly, are you in my bed?"
Serena shrugs one shoulder and looks down again. "No one else's bed to be in."
Blair laughs out loud and tilts her head. "Really, S? You expect me to believe that statement coming from you, of all people?" Serena just blinks. "Carter, Nate, Dan. Let's see, who else have you had in your harem in the last few months?"
"It's not like that." She sounds sad, resigned to some kind of loveless life, and Blair doesn't buy it for a second. Something else has happened.
"Well, we all know which of the three I'd chose for you if it were up to me," Blair insists, smoothing a hand over the front of her skirt. "Carter is a terrible choice, unreliable. Dan is...Well, we both know my opinions on that, so I'll save my breath. Nate is the only suitable man for you."
Serena looks up, thinks about it for a moment. Blair might be right, but it doesn't change anything. The same might have been true since they were children, but things are different now, harder, and it's not as easy as Blair bossing them around and reminding them that she always gets her way.
Serena wishes, sometimes, that it was.
"Well, Nate is the one showing the least interest," Serena says quietly.
Blair rolls her eyes, crawls up the bed and leans against the headboard like Serena. This melancholy makes a lot more sense. Serena really only ever acts like this when there's something to do with Nate. "Men are idiots."
Serena laughs and nods. "They are."
"The only man a girl can trust is her daddy," Blair recites. They look at one another after a moment, then both start to laugh.
Serena ends up laying sideways across the bed with her head on Blair's thigh. Blair runs her hand through Serena's hair like they've always done for one another when things get like this, too painful or too hard to handle. They're there for one another no matter what. Like right now, Blair is supposed to be going to Chuck's. It's not a date, really, she just said she was going over to spend the evening with him. They aren't back to normal yet, but they've been spending time with one another, talking, trying to shed the 'toxic' label their relationship has always had. She's not going to leave Serena to go drink a martini with him and talk about their respective days.
"I just want who I want, and I want him to want me," Serena insists. She looks up at Blair, and Blair gives a half smile. Her hand moves from Serena's hair to play with the tie of her robe.
"It would be easier that way," Blair says quietly. "Less interesting, though. Kissing frogs is half the fun, isn't it?"
Serena laughs and shakes her head, moving a little so her head rests against Blair's stomach. "Says the girl who's had, like, two frogs."
"That's not fair!" Blair laughs.
Her hand is idly tugging at Serena's robe while they both giggle, and it feels like they're 13 again. Only if they were 13, it would have been Blair complaining about Nate and Serena talking about whomever it was she was into that week. It's interesting, Blair thinks, how they're both in these situations that have left their hearts hurting, and years later, they're still in exactly the same room, exactly the same position.
"I love you, you know," she says out of nowhere.
Serena opens her eyes and smiles at her best friend. She knows. Sometimes it's still nice to hear the words. It's always nice to hear the words.
"I know," she whispers. "Love you, too."
Blair unties Serena's robe and the fabric falls aside, showing what she has underneath. "You're wearing my nightgown?"
Serena giggles and runs her hand over her breast and down to her stomach. "I told you. I borrowed it." Blair rolls her eyes and shakes her head. Her hand comes to rest on Serena's and their fingers twine together. "It's kind of short."
"Can't be any shorter than the rest of the things you wear," Blair teases.
"Better than this," Serena says, plucking at the front of Blair's shirt. "What are you, a lawyer or something?"
Blair grins. "Not yet." Serena rolls her eyes. "I like this top."
"It's pretty," Serena agrees. She reaches up and undoes the top button. Blair does nothing, so Serena undoes another one. "Oh, my god. You matched your bra to your skirt?" She laughs hard and looks at Blair's face. Her cheeks are a little pink. "You're too cute, Blair. You need to be less cute."
"I like being cute," Blair pouts. Serena laughs some more and Blair doesn't stop her when she unbuttons the shirt the rest of the way. She finds her own hand moving up Serena's stomach just slightly. She doesn't know when they stopped holding hands. "You need to stop stealing my things."
Serena shrugs, and Blair finds herself staring at the line of her friend's collarbone, the curve of her breast. "Been doing it all my life."
There's something sad to it, like it goes past clothes and bedrooms and silly things like lip gloss or hair bands. It goes to affections and boys and just about anything Blair has wanted. They both know there are no hard feelings there anymore.
But they both know that Serena takes things that aren't hers. It's what she's always done.
"Exactly." Serena sits up, the robe falling off her shoulders until she shrugs it off completely and tosses it to the end of the bed.
Blair tells herself this isn't anything. They're just talking. There's nothing happening here that should be questioned.
Then Serena's hand is slipping under the open fabric of Blair's shirt to rest on her waist, and Blair realizes she's got her hand on Serena's thigh, just beneath the fabric of the silk slip she's wearing.
"Serena..." The blonde smiles, so Blair stops talking. When Serena's thumb grazes the underside of her breast through her bra, Blair sucks in a breath and their eyes meet.
"Men are idiots," Serena says.
Blair bites her bottom lip, and Serena moves closer. They've kissed before, enough times that Serena knows how Blair tastes. They french kissed once, on a dare, and it hasn't happened in years, and they've never done it like this, sober and in the quiet and with Serena in lingerie and Blair with her shirt unbuttoned. Still, all Serena can see right now that her best friend is beautiful, and brave, and they love one another, and she wants to kiss her. She places her free hand on Blair's cheek, leans forward on her knees, and presses their lips together.
Blair kisses back. She doesn't know why, just that Serena feels nice, soft, and sweet, and different than Chuck, who was the last person she kissed, the person she's kissed most in her life. Serena moves one of her knees to the other side of Blair's body so she's straddling her lap. Blair realizes her hand is dangerously close to her best friend's behind, skin on skin, her fingertips grazing the elastic of Serena's panties.
"S," she whispers. Thinking of Chuck just now reminded her of everything. Everything, like the fact that she's sort of got a boyfriend (or whatever it is she and Chuck can classify themselves as) and Serena is in love with someone else.
"Do you want to?" Serena asks, a little breathless.
Blair doesn't know what that implies, but she looks into Serena's eyes, so blue, and feels the warm palm on the side of her neck, the thumb running over the soft, sensitive skin below her ear, and she thinks the answer is yes. She's barely nodded once and they're kissing again. It's still soft, testing, like they're not really sure what to do with one another, if they should do anything. Blair isn't a fool. She's always assumed Serena had perhaps 'experimented' with this kind of thing before. If she's being honest, this isn't the first time she's thought about it. It seems no one is immune to Serena's charm and beauty and whatever that intangible thing is she possesses.
"Have you ever...before?" she asks, because she feels she needs to know. Serena sits back on Blair's legs and it almost hurts, but she's too nervous to ask her to move. The blonde shakes her head and Blair finds herself smiling.
Serena hooks her finger into the front of Blair's bra and pulls her forward, then pushes the shirt off Blair's arms. "We can be each others' first," she says, and they both giggle a little before kissing again.
Serena moves after a while and lays on her back on the bed. She smiles when Blair looks down at her, confused and maybe annoyed. She's itching to pull this nightgown over her head, but she doesn't really know how far either of them are willing to take this (even though neither of them are virgins, not by a long shot). This really does feel that way, though, the first time for something you're not sure you're ready for. Blair lays down, too, and Serena reaches back and slides down the zipper of Blair's skirt, pushing at the fabric a little bit. It's not like they haven't seen one another naked before. Just not when they're each wearing the same two kinds of lip gloss and their cheeks are flushed.
Blair pushes her skirt off her hips and laughs when Serena is right there, hooking her fingers into the waistband of Blair's stockings and pulling them down her legs. She lays down on top of Blair afterward, shifting until their bodies feel comfortable against one another. She nips at Blair's lips again, feels her friend pulling up the fabric of the nightgown until it's at her waist and Blair's hands are on her hips.
"We're almost naked," Serena says, her hand warm on Blair's side.
"I thought that was the idea," Blair says, sounding just a little annoyed.
Serena smiles. She always knew Blair would be impatient like that with regards to sex. "Is it still the idea?"
Blair feels a little daring, maybe feeling that thing men do, accomplishment over being like this with Serena van der Woodsen, and reaches between them, touches Serena through her panties. Serena's back arches and she rolls her hips.
"Yes," Blair says needlessly, right before Serena's lips descend onto hers again.
After they've shed the rest of their clothes and she's got one hand in Serena's hair, the other clutching at the sheets as Serena kisses her between her thighs, Blair stops thinking of ways to justify all this. It's just happening, and it's amazing, and oh, it's true that no one knows you like your best friend does.
... ... ...
Serena's cheeks are pink and she's laying beneath the covers, still completely undressed and holding her best friend's hand. They're giggling, still on a high from what they just did, still both a little in shock, still both sated.
"The door's open," Serena notes, sending them into fits of laughter again. She lays her head against Blair's collarbone, her her leg over the brunette's hip.
"I stood Chuck up. It's a good thing he didn't come looking for me."
Serena pulls away and grins. Blair doesn't know if she should trust that look, but she trusts Serena inherently, so she doesn't ask questions. "We'll invite him next time."
If there wasn't a hand trailing down her stomach and then fingertips ghosting over the inside of her thigh, Blair would insist there's not going to be a next time.