this silence gets us nowhere way too fast
well today was definatly the hottest day of the year. and muggy, and humid. ick. summers coming soon. 18 days left of school. i can almost taste the freedom, smell the leather of alex's car, see what california will be like. there was actually a little bit of fog coming out this morning, which was nice to see from my balcony....
i remember being 6 years old and seeing fog here for the first time. i was so excited because i had always wanted to sit on a cloud. as i kid i would look up at the sky and see those big white fluffy things and wish that i could sit on one, because how could something so beautiful not be the most comfortable thing on earth? well when the fog came in i ran out onto my balcony to get a good seat. i couldnt wait to touch it. never had i been so disapointed in my life when i found out that clouds were just little droplets of water, and you couldnt even really feel a cloud, let alone sit on one. that night though, i dreamt that i was in the sky and dropped on a cloud and i slept there. i figured that was where heaven was... definatly... i still that thats where heaven must be.
there is a storm coming, i hear the thunder. ill raise my blinds so i can watch the rain drops cover my windows and the wind bend the trees and throw leaves up onto my balcony. a guilty pleasure.
i found out that this girl alex from rowing is going out with the guy i like there. i liked him a lot, he was the first guy i ever liked after the whole new years ordeal. thank god he wasnt there today though, that wouldve been.. uncomfortable. of course i wont tell anyone now that shes going out with him, because i couldnt even get up the courage to tell anyone when he didnt have a girlfriend. but no one will ever know because i dont want to ruin things for alex, and after they break up i cant go out with him cause he'll be her ex and i have to respect the "no dating the ex" rule. i already fucked that one up and i wont do it again. but shes so sweet and shes one of my closest friends at rowing so ill find a way to suck it up and get over him. i always do anyways.
here come the black clouds rolling in.....
"When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
And I wish I was special
You're so fuckin' special
But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.
I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When I'm not around
You're so fuckin' special
I wish I was special"
-- radiohead, creep
i remember being 6 years old and seeing fog here for the first time. i was so excited because i had always wanted to sit on a cloud. as i kid i would look up at the sky and see those big white fluffy things and wish that i could sit on one, because how could something so beautiful not be the most comfortable thing on earth? well when the fog came in i ran out onto my balcony to get a good seat. i couldnt wait to touch it. never had i been so disapointed in my life when i found out that clouds were just little droplets of water, and you couldnt even really feel a cloud, let alone sit on one. that night though, i dreamt that i was in the sky and dropped on a cloud and i slept there. i figured that was where heaven was... definatly... i still that thats where heaven must be.
there is a storm coming, i hear the thunder. ill raise my blinds so i can watch the rain drops cover my windows and the wind bend the trees and throw leaves up onto my balcony. a guilty pleasure.
i found out that this girl alex from rowing is going out with the guy i like there. i liked him a lot, he was the first guy i ever liked after the whole new years ordeal. thank god he wasnt there today though, that wouldve been.. uncomfortable. of course i wont tell anyone now that shes going out with him, because i couldnt even get up the courage to tell anyone when he didnt have a girlfriend. but no one will ever know because i dont want to ruin things for alex, and after they break up i cant go out with him cause he'll be her ex and i have to respect the "no dating the ex" rule. i already fucked that one up and i wont do it again. but shes so sweet and shes one of my closest friends at rowing so ill find a way to suck it up and get over him. i always do anyways.
here come the black clouds rolling in.....
"When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
And I wish I was special
You're so fuckin' special
But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.
I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When I'm not around
You're so fuckin' special
I wish I was special"
-- radiohead, creep