Truth_or_dare Week 18: Truth
Truth: Discuss a habit you would like to quit.
I guess I could say something obvious--smoking cigars or drinking, but the truth is, those aren't really "habits" as much as they are "vices", and I like them just fine, thanks, so I don't want to quit them. I fly planes for a living and shoot at things that are trying to kill me. I'd like to think it's okay I relax a little bit afterwards. And if you don't think so, well, frak you.
What habit do I really want to quit?
I want to stop frakking things up.
By that, I mean, I want to stop thinking that I'm a frak-up and that I'm always going to ruin everything. Because, yeah yeah, I've heard all that you bring to yourself what you expect crap, whatever, and maybe it's true and maybe it's not. But I always figured I'm doomed to just ruin things, things being relationships, and I don't want that anymore. I don't want to do that with Sam, and I don't--I don't want to think it's just inevitable and that I shouldn't try because I'll just end up hurt and he'll be hurt and we'll be right back where we started when I came back from being dead and he found out he was a Cylon.
I mean, part of me still thinks it's true, that I'm giving it another shot and it's just going to hurt worse when things go all to hell. But that doesn't mean, I guess, I have to act like it's true. So, you know, maybe it's okay that I can tell Sam, "Hey, I missed you today," and not say, "Gods, why do you keep coming back here?" and stuff like that. Because I really do mean both of them--I am glad to see him and I still don't get why he sticks around--but the second one, that's the kind of thing I always say.
So I'm going to try not to do that, not to say the mean thing all the time just because I think it's true. Because for some reason Sam sticks around and came back and wants to try again. And I do too, I really do.
So I guess I'll try and act like it, once in a while.
I guess I could say something obvious--smoking cigars or drinking, but the truth is, those aren't really "habits" as much as they are "vices", and I like them just fine, thanks, so I don't want to quit them. I fly planes for a living and shoot at things that are trying to kill me. I'd like to think it's okay I relax a little bit afterwards. And if you don't think so, well, frak you.
What habit do I really want to quit?
I want to stop frakking things up.
By that, I mean, I want to stop thinking that I'm a frak-up and that I'm always going to ruin everything. Because, yeah yeah, I've heard all that you bring to yourself what you expect crap, whatever, and maybe it's true and maybe it's not. But I always figured I'm doomed to just ruin things, things being relationships, and I don't want that anymore. I don't want to do that with Sam, and I don't--I don't want to think it's just inevitable and that I shouldn't try because I'll just end up hurt and he'll be hurt and we'll be right back where we started when I came back from being dead and he found out he was a Cylon.
I mean, part of me still thinks it's true, that I'm giving it another shot and it's just going to hurt worse when things go all to hell. But that doesn't mean, I guess, I have to act like it's true. So, you know, maybe it's okay that I can tell Sam, "Hey, I missed you today," and not say, "Gods, why do you keep coming back here?" and stuff like that. Because I really do mean both of them--I am glad to see him and I still don't get why he sticks around--but the second one, that's the kind of thing I always say.
So I'm going to try not to do that, not to say the mean thing all the time just because I think it's true. Because for some reason Sam sticks around and came back and wants to try again. And I do too, I really do.
So I guess I'll try and act like it, once in a while.