(no subject)
i'm sick for the first time this winter, with a very typical cold. achey body, sore throat (that has now progressed to a dry / scratchy throat), cough, hot flashes, etc. the worst part of it is over. my wonderful boyfriend took care of me this weekend, giving me medicine and laughing at the faces i made as it went down.
yesterday at work, i stood next to someone who interests me. we've spoken a few times, and i enjoy his sense of humor and what he has to say. when it came time to make conversation, i couldn't. i wanted to ask how his day was; what was new in his life; how the fiddle was going; ANYTHING. but all that came out? nothing.
in the moment, i became fully aware of how paralyzing shyness can be. i've heard stories of people waking up during surgery, being aware of their surroundings and the pain, but not being able to move or speak to alert someone. this is what shyness is like. it's being trapped in a body with the desire to speak, to express something, and not being able to.
if you do not experience it, you will not understand it. those that do not understand, are the ones that are so quick to suggest, as a solution, "just say it!"
that doesn't help.
that doesn't help.
that doesn't help.
i am comfortable, and even content with silence. it is when i want to talk to someone that my shyness conquers me.
it scares me that my shyness used to be so much more worse.
yesterday at work, i stood next to someone who interests me. we've spoken a few times, and i enjoy his sense of humor and what he has to say. when it came time to make conversation, i couldn't. i wanted to ask how his day was; what was new in his life; how the fiddle was going; ANYTHING. but all that came out? nothing.
in the moment, i became fully aware of how paralyzing shyness can be. i've heard stories of people waking up during surgery, being aware of their surroundings and the pain, but not being able to move or speak to alert someone. this is what shyness is like. it's being trapped in a body with the desire to speak, to express something, and not being able to.
if you do not experience it, you will not understand it. those that do not understand, are the ones that are so quick to suggest, as a solution, "just say it!"
that doesn't help.
that doesn't help.
that doesn't help.
i am comfortable, and even content with silence. it is when i want to talk to someone that my shyness conquers me.
it scares me that my shyness used to be so much more worse.