(no subject)
umm yeah last night was our second away v-ball game- guess what. we lost. losing always puts me in a crappy mood but o well its over now- so saturday we have a tourney at foley. good luck to us. umm well after the game i was in a frickin horrible mood and i cant even describe how pissed, tired, sad, mad, angry, bitchy, bad, etc i felt. on top of our loss, i had to "study" for 3 tests which i did not have time to do, and i also had to write a lit paper which i did in chem. i went to sleep last night crying forever cuz i could not settle down. i pretty much had a panic attack because i had so much to do. i hate doc money with a fucking passion.
im sick of everything getting screwed up as a result of me being gone 24/7. i leave for school at 6:15, get to school, it goes till 3, then go to drivers training till 5, then stay at school until volleyball which usually ends at 10 ish. im emotionally and physically drained from all of this and i dont know how to fix it. i need more sleep, i dont have energy, and i dont have time to do my homework. but which sucks the most is that i never see my family or friends anymore. im gone all the time so the only person i ever see is my dad who drives me everywhere. i miss my mom and my sisters. and i miss being able to talk to my friends and hang out with them. i need a huge fat break. do u ever get that feeling where so much is going wrong where u dont know what to do so u just want to run away and never come back, well yeah thats how i kinda feel. and so much is happening, im so confused. well enough complaining about my life even tho i dont mean to, im just extremely stressed. im sick of feeling sorry for myself.this was the worst day of my life besides when bob :( died. god i miss him sooo much. we used to hang his stocking up every year and give him treats. and i keep expecting to put it up this year again. well ok im gonna go sleep early cuz i have to be at school at 7-30.
rachel i luv you soooo much- dont be sad. and ellen i luv you sooo much too!
<3333 christmas is comin!
im sick of everything getting screwed up as a result of me being gone 24/7. i leave for school at 6:15, get to school, it goes till 3, then go to drivers training till 5, then stay at school until volleyball which usually ends at 10 ish. im emotionally and physically drained from all of this and i dont know how to fix it. i need more sleep, i dont have energy, and i dont have time to do my homework. but which sucks the most is that i never see my family or friends anymore. im gone all the time so the only person i ever see is my dad who drives me everywhere. i miss my mom and my sisters. and i miss being able to talk to my friends and hang out with them. i need a huge fat break. do u ever get that feeling where so much is going wrong where u dont know what to do so u just want to run away and never come back, well yeah thats how i kinda feel. and so much is happening, im so confused. well enough complaining about my life even tho i dont mean to, im just extremely stressed. im sick of feeling sorry for myself.this was the worst day of my life besides when bob :( died. god i miss him sooo much. we used to hang his stocking up every year and give him treats. and i keep expecting to put it up this year again. well ok im gonna go sleep early cuz i have to be at school at 7-30.
rachel i luv you soooo much- dont be sad. and ellen i luv you sooo much too!
<3333 christmas is comin!