COming clean
I tried to be the better person and i tried to make things right between you and him. But after the way he treated me recently i realized hes not worth lieing about my own life tos umone who doesnt care about me at all. Also.. why lie to sumone when iw ouldnt want anyone ever lieing to me if i was in this position. Open your eyes girl..
My ex fiance', Joe, just got off the fone with me. Its our one year today oddly enough LoL But he told me how clueless i am and hes right. I was with him and i totaly am being now... or was being i should say. I always do this and Joe knows this. i always go bak thinking ppl change.. they dont.
I told Bert not to call me anymore. im going to stop hanging ut witht hat whole crowd because it just hurts. It cant work with us being just freinds. We tried.. and we were toegther at least once a week the whole time he was with Kristy. No exageration ont hat btw and I have no reason to lie.
Also. Um DUH he saw me on vaca. Sorry i lied but he still wanted to be friends with you and he asked me to because he didnt need the stress. Yea.. and i took that as him wanting to leave you so he could finally hang out with me without stress.. yea didnt happen. Because hes just still using me and i finally realize this.
He came over last night with Rob. Fucked me. Then rudely left to go fourwheeling.
I had never felt so used. Never been so hurt. I fucking lied for the asshole.. bent over backwards and went through all this crap for him and what does he do... naw brah. Im done.
I have a new group of friends who appriciate me and have my bak hardcore. They know you dont deserve me. And even when you said you had no reaosn to lie to me.. you did. I have seen and hear you lie to her to protect her feelings.. or maybe just because u hate confrontation.. but dont think you can do it to me. Its worse when you lie and i have told you this. i told you to just tell her truth because people respect you mroe for that. But no. Dont listen to me just keep being a prick and fucking yourself over harder and harder.
And if you hear Im pregnant.. Im not. Yea a really shitty and retarded thing to lie about but he oddly talked me into lieing about it. He wanted me to start the rumor so you would hear it and leave him so he wouldnt have to go through the bullshit of having ot kick you out. Pretty shitty huh? i realize now i was an IDIOT for thinking i could do that and not look like a dumbass lol.. but watever. I wanna really apolojize to Autumn on that one because she was soo fuking nice to me when i lied to her about it... sucks what you do for love doesnt it. That si the worst liek i have ever told.. and all for an asshole. Whow oulda thunk it.
Thanks to Joe for being harsh but telling me what an idiot I am. HAppy one year DEAR!
Anyways. Now that thats done. I can finally move on with a clear concience.
Katies leaving 2morro. me and heather are driving her to the airport. It sucks im gunna miss her hardcore. we went out to eat tonight and shes over right now. We did it up Boarder style like the old times. Joe even said hsi goodbyes and shit.
Im moving out. I have thousands int he bank from my grandfather and im getting out. i need to do this now. my moms flipping out hardcore and beign a cunt... im out. I cant wait anymore. Hopefully christines ready cuz i know i am.
One mre thing. Theres a high chance you two will get back together i know this... just be carefull. He really is never going to change. And dont believe him when he says it was all me.. he went for walks and shit to call me all vacation... if anything he was the agresser. He drove down to see me .. i dont have a car to do that. He comes here to see me.. i dont drive him here. Just keep thats hit in mind next time you wanna believe his bullshit. And if you guys did sleep toegther saturday night.. cuz i know you stayed over... know he called me 3 times that night and was planning to come here to sleep with me.. wich is why he made up for it sunday afternoon. Dont trust him. Even as a freind.. not even having a commitment to him or anything i cant trust him. How sketchy is thats hit?
2 years is a long ass time and i give you props... but for sum reaosn i doubt anyone deserve how much he lies to you. Im sorry for letting him i guess... shoulda seen it form the other perspective.
Im going to bed. its been a long day with goodbyes and shit and ex's and crap. Its Nicks 2 months today too.. damn i miss him. I cant even look at my BJ's hat anymore still.
I stared in the mirror and contemplated what he did. I couldnt do it. No matter how much my life really blows right now.. i couldnt leave that way. What would people say? What would they blame it on? Men? My mom? how my life is going NOWHERE right now? But its not that. Its just me. i wish i could start over on so manyt hings you know? Skewl. Freidnships. I wish i knw how to walk away and say no. I wish i knew whetn to throw in the towel you know. Theres a good side in every perosn.. possibly.. but its not always there and the bad side does always come out.
Blah. Im done here. Need sleep gotta wake up mad ass early. Later freaks.
Oh and shouts to Pat right now... you really cheered me up tonight i appriciate it. love you man.
My ex fiance', Joe, just got off the fone with me. Its our one year today oddly enough LoL But he told me how clueless i am and hes right. I was with him and i totaly am being now... or was being i should say. I always do this and Joe knows this. i always go bak thinking ppl change.. they dont.
I told Bert not to call me anymore. im going to stop hanging ut witht hat whole crowd because it just hurts. It cant work with us being just freinds. We tried.. and we were toegther at least once a week the whole time he was with Kristy. No exageration ont hat btw and I have no reason to lie.
Also. Um DUH he saw me on vaca. Sorry i lied but he still wanted to be friends with you and he asked me to because he didnt need the stress. Yea.. and i took that as him wanting to leave you so he could finally hang out with me without stress.. yea didnt happen. Because hes just still using me and i finally realize this.
He came over last night with Rob. Fucked me. Then rudely left to go fourwheeling.
I had never felt so used. Never been so hurt. I fucking lied for the asshole.. bent over backwards and went through all this crap for him and what does he do... naw brah. Im done.
I have a new group of friends who appriciate me and have my bak hardcore. They know you dont deserve me. And even when you said you had no reaosn to lie to me.. you did. I have seen and hear you lie to her to protect her feelings.. or maybe just because u hate confrontation.. but dont think you can do it to me. Its worse when you lie and i have told you this. i told you to just tell her truth because people respect you mroe for that. But no. Dont listen to me just keep being a prick and fucking yourself over harder and harder.
And if you hear Im pregnant.. Im not. Yea a really shitty and retarded thing to lie about but he oddly talked me into lieing about it. He wanted me to start the rumor so you would hear it and leave him so he wouldnt have to go through the bullshit of having ot kick you out. Pretty shitty huh? i realize now i was an IDIOT for thinking i could do that and not look like a dumbass lol.. but watever. I wanna really apolojize to Autumn on that one because she was soo fuking nice to me when i lied to her about it... sucks what you do for love doesnt it. That si the worst liek i have ever told.. and all for an asshole. Whow oulda thunk it.
Thanks to Joe for being harsh but telling me what an idiot I am. HAppy one year DEAR!
Anyways. Now that thats done. I can finally move on with a clear concience.
Katies leaving 2morro. me and heather are driving her to the airport. It sucks im gunna miss her hardcore. we went out to eat tonight and shes over right now. We did it up Boarder style like the old times. Joe even said hsi goodbyes and shit.
Im moving out. I have thousands int he bank from my grandfather and im getting out. i need to do this now. my moms flipping out hardcore and beign a cunt... im out. I cant wait anymore. Hopefully christines ready cuz i know i am.
One mre thing. Theres a high chance you two will get back together i know this... just be carefull. He really is never going to change. And dont believe him when he says it was all me.. he went for walks and shit to call me all vacation... if anything he was the agresser. He drove down to see me .. i dont have a car to do that. He comes here to see me.. i dont drive him here. Just keep thats hit in mind next time you wanna believe his bullshit. And if you guys did sleep toegther saturday night.. cuz i know you stayed over... know he called me 3 times that night and was planning to come here to sleep with me.. wich is why he made up for it sunday afternoon. Dont trust him. Even as a freind.. not even having a commitment to him or anything i cant trust him. How sketchy is thats hit?
2 years is a long ass time and i give you props... but for sum reaosn i doubt anyone deserve how much he lies to you. Im sorry for letting him i guess... shoulda seen it form the other perspective.
Im going to bed. its been a long day with goodbyes and shit and ex's and crap. Its Nicks 2 months today too.. damn i miss him. I cant even look at my BJ's hat anymore still.
I stared in the mirror and contemplated what he did. I couldnt do it. No matter how much my life really blows right now.. i couldnt leave that way. What would people say? What would they blame it on? Men? My mom? how my life is going NOWHERE right now? But its not that. Its just me. i wish i could start over on so manyt hings you know? Skewl. Freidnships. I wish i knw how to walk away and say no. I wish i knew whetn to throw in the towel you know. Theres a good side in every perosn.. possibly.. but its not always there and the bad side does always come out.
Blah. Im done here. Need sleep gotta wake up mad ass early. Later freaks.
Oh and shouts to Pat right now... you really cheered me up tonight i appriciate it. love you man.