Trying to heal
Yes Christmas finally came and went it was probably one of the worse Christmases i could ever have.
The day b4 Christmas eve was awesome. Meredith got to meet my good friends for dinner and some drinka. Meredith impressed me once again. We both got a litte drunk. Well she was more so then me i think. I was doubting our relationship once again simply because we seem like two extremely different people and i couldnt see myself getting seriously involved with her. Well she made me think otherwise simply with some drinking and her awesome comments. She didnt like the next morning, sucked to be her.
Christmas eve was good in fact it was great. Went over to my grandmas exchanged gifts, went to a local bar with my family where my brothers friends met up with us and then went over to my buddy's Chris's place had a beer and then went over to qxts. Tried to get drunk there but for some reason i couldn't, probably the two meatball sandwiches i had at my grandmas and the tortilla chips and veggies were sitting in my stomach. Went back to chris's stayed up with kalis and we went and got some pizza bites and degirno pizza and chowed down. Orginally we tried white castle but they were closed so we had to swing by 7/11. I got home after 4am i believe.
Well Christmas sucked because in the morning my mom, my sister and myself drove my dog honor to the emergency vetinary hospital in iselin to put him to sleep. It was his christmas present from us to him. He needed to be put down a while ago because he was having all sorts of problems, but this time he couldnt stand up what so ever. His back was giving out on him. So we had no choice. It sucked to do it then but we didnt think it was fair for him to have to wait till today or even monday. I never cried on christmas before luckily my sister was there to comfort me and our mom. I tried to remain strong for my mom, but I couldnt hold it in. I cried my heart out. Nothing like doing in that in a room full of strangers and a hot Vet nurse. My mom exploded an hour or two later and was questioning herself, if she did the right thing. Also kept on going on about how she didnt think it would hurt this much. That hurt me seeing that, but once again myself and my sister comforted her. I still think about him, I actually thought i heard his collar when I came home from qs on sat. Silly me imed april again and got into a fight. She thinks Meredith will walk all over me because shes gona get fed up with the immaturity and clinginess. Whatever april thats you not her. So far Meredith is a completely different person and has showed the ut most respect for me more so then her. Yea I rubbed it in her face to about how happy I am with Meredith so she told me to stop talking to her and to leave her alone. Well I will do just that. Simple little block button works just great.
So today was an easy day. Went up to peapack to chill at my aunts. Had some quiche and pate and drank some beers. Opened up gifts and saw how talented my cousin is with Macromedia Flash. I left there and went to merediths had a nice home cooked dinner that her mom made which was very tasty but gave a me a bunch of gas. Lately meredith has been acting slightly different towards me, more cuddly then usual. In fact she came out on christmas eve for one beer for like an hr. I dont know why she came out I suppose she might have wanted to chill out at my place but she had to get up early and she knew I was going over to my friends house, but she didnt want to go to qxts. So I dont know. I think the fact i keep calling her my gf and she hasnt said a word about it and is more cuddly means she in it for the long haul. So far its been 2 weeks now of being with just one girl.. Im glad one turned out to be more into her bf then me and wants to remain just friends and the others havent given me the time of day.
Well Im on vacation all week. Hopefully Ill be partying it up to prepare for my last days of not drinking. Yea u heard me correct. My new years resolution will be to quit drinking. I wanted to go cold turkey but meredith is like how about u just eeez off. So we will see. We might be heading into the city new years eve with her friend and her friends bf and cousin. Dont think I will be drinking that much simply cause of the crowds, I was hoping to go out with a bang.
The day b4 Christmas eve was awesome. Meredith got to meet my good friends for dinner and some drinka. Meredith impressed me once again. We both got a litte drunk. Well she was more so then me i think. I was doubting our relationship once again simply because we seem like two extremely different people and i couldnt see myself getting seriously involved with her. Well she made me think otherwise simply with some drinking and her awesome comments. She didnt like the next morning, sucked to be her.
Christmas eve was good in fact it was great. Went over to my grandmas exchanged gifts, went to a local bar with my family where my brothers friends met up with us and then went over to my buddy's Chris's place had a beer and then went over to qxts. Tried to get drunk there but for some reason i couldn't, probably the two meatball sandwiches i had at my grandmas and the tortilla chips and veggies were sitting in my stomach. Went back to chris's stayed up with kalis and we went and got some pizza bites and degirno pizza and chowed down. Orginally we tried white castle but they were closed so we had to swing by 7/11. I got home after 4am i believe.
Well Christmas sucked because in the morning my mom, my sister and myself drove my dog honor to the emergency vetinary hospital in iselin to put him to sleep. It was his christmas present from us to him. He needed to be put down a while ago because he was having all sorts of problems, but this time he couldnt stand up what so ever. His back was giving out on him. So we had no choice. It sucked to do it then but we didnt think it was fair for him to have to wait till today or even monday. I never cried on christmas before luckily my sister was there to comfort me and our mom. I tried to remain strong for my mom, but I couldnt hold it in. I cried my heart out. Nothing like doing in that in a room full of strangers and a hot Vet nurse. My mom exploded an hour or two later and was questioning herself, if she did the right thing. Also kept on going on about how she didnt think it would hurt this much. That hurt me seeing that, but once again myself and my sister comforted her. I still think about him, I actually thought i heard his collar when I came home from qs on sat. Silly me imed april again and got into a fight. She thinks Meredith will walk all over me because shes gona get fed up with the immaturity and clinginess. Whatever april thats you not her. So far Meredith is a completely different person and has showed the ut most respect for me more so then her. Yea I rubbed it in her face to about how happy I am with Meredith so she told me to stop talking to her and to leave her alone. Well I will do just that. Simple little block button works just great.
So today was an easy day. Went up to peapack to chill at my aunts. Had some quiche and pate and drank some beers. Opened up gifts and saw how talented my cousin is with Macromedia Flash. I left there and went to merediths had a nice home cooked dinner that her mom made which was very tasty but gave a me a bunch of gas. Lately meredith has been acting slightly different towards me, more cuddly then usual. In fact she came out on christmas eve for one beer for like an hr. I dont know why she came out I suppose she might have wanted to chill out at my place but she had to get up early and she knew I was going over to my friends house, but she didnt want to go to qxts. So I dont know. I think the fact i keep calling her my gf and she hasnt said a word about it and is more cuddly means she in it for the long haul. So far its been 2 weeks now of being with just one girl.. Im glad one turned out to be more into her bf then me and wants to remain just friends and the others havent given me the time of day.
Well Im on vacation all week. Hopefully Ill be partying it up to prepare for my last days of not drinking. Yea u heard me correct. My new years resolution will be to quit drinking. I wanted to go cold turkey but meredith is like how about u just eeez off. So we will see. We might be heading into the city new years eve with her friend and her friends bf and cousin. Dont think I will be drinking that much simply cause of the crowds, I was hoping to go out with a bang.