Mar 01, 2006 21:50
Please...patron with crutches and pessimistic attitude, stop making snot swallowing sounds. You have been here almost 2 hours now and you keep grating snot from your throat and swallowing it, loudly in a disgusting slurping fashion. I'm not sure I could ever eat Ramen noodles without bringing this to my warped and bruised mind. You are evil, or maybe good, because I am evil and I definitely don't want to be on your side, biyatch. I have a confession to make, while I may play nice librarian person, I don't like you and only listen to you because no one else has the patience to. I don't want you to hurt yourself or anyone so I'm only pretending to give advice and help when it comes to your personal life but if you suddenly were to die tonight, I would probably breathe a sigh of relief because the sun would shine just a little brighter in Columbia, MIssouri. I'm not trying to be mean but you are, in essence, a nihilistic, pessimistic bitch wholly self-absorbed in your own life but to pathetic to make any attempt at changing it because you get some sick delight and pleasure out of forcing it on others so that they will share the misery you have created for yourself. My advice tonight is: Do something, anything! Stop writing poetry about suicide and write poetry about fucking. Use your imagination, it's called creativity and your classmates will be fucking ecstatic to not have to read one more story about a character commiting suicide in wholly unrealistic situations.
whew glad i got that off my chest! I feel great and healthy. My heartbeat is normal, my bloodpressure is great and I'm losing weight again. Jack Daniels, I'm comin' home and your mine.