Kiss her goodbye suicide

[buffaloboy]

It's cold and slick and solid and I can see a distorted reflection of me in its barrel, chamber and hammer. Such a small and dangerous life altering cylinder of metal slides in it's casing, copper with a silver tip. The clicks, the metallic snap as things fall into place. Pull back the hammer calculating the outcome, ridding myself of second guessing, contemplating regret, the hammer rigidly clacking till it finds it point. Locked and waiting it's order from the trigger. Raise it to the left side of my head without hesitation and the crackle of thunder is quickly overcome by silence which in turn gives way to a deafening piercing ring. The smell of gun powder the smell of change. On my left shoulder lays an angel. Dead. On my right shoulder a smiling devil.

There's a dead angel on my left shoulder
Heaven I sent it back your way
All I have to go on is what the devil on my right has to say
I know they're lies but the truth was much worse
Your constant words of hope where more of a hindrance
more of a curse
So I'll live my life in all it's selfish splendor
This life is too................

-JV