just a small town girl, livin in a lonely world...
"Out of my life
Everyone said you ain't no good
Then you prove them right
You're leaving tonight
It's over and done
Ain't no sense in trying to wait till the morning comes...."
There's this song that I heard on the radio the day after I left. It was by Ne-Yo and Jennifer Hudson called "Leavin tonight"...basically he wants to stay and she can't forgive it. It was a hot and somewhat unreal day for me. I was driving, for the last time, in his bird shit mobile.
That was nearly 3 months ago.
I went back to New York, kind of cold and depleted in the middle of June. I decided that staying in DC wasn't worth it after moving 3 times in the course of a month. I was exhausted as well, and everywhere I went it was hard to breathe. Also, he kept threatening me and his life and my commitments, like soccer and work. It was terrible.
One day after I got back, I got hired to work as a camp counselor. So, I drove down to DC that thursday to get my stuff from Patricia's place and, against all wishes from all friends, went out to dinner with him. I felt that the way I saw him last was a horrible way to say goodbye, and that we had to face each other if only for a minute. We had dinner and then proceeded to walk around the same 3 blocks in DC for awhile...we talked about our relationship, without fighting really. And i dunno...there was nothin else, just us, the world was rarely in on moments with him. Then we were back in front of the restaurant. We were back to where we started, in more ways than one. I then suggested that we take a new road - to leave things somewhere new, to clear the air, just to not leave it there. We ended up hearing some music and low & behold there was a new orleans style bucket band playing on the corner and people were dancing. We danced for a minute, then talked and ... then we said goodbye a little later. We hugged and I walked away, a new day after a stormy night style.
The next day I started work in upstate NY. Going straight to work after that night was good for me. I got to get all of it off my mind. There were times though that I would nearly cry.
"Cause nothing compares, nothing compares to you"
ohhh man, it feels so weird not tellin him all my thoughts and such. And when I heard from him thursday night that he was leavin our place...sleep wasn't an option.
I remember one night working at Cap Lounge in DC. I remember the song by journey, and the line "a singer in a smokey room, a smell of wine and cheap perfume...for a smile they can share the night...it goes on and on and on and onn"...it was a slow night - but it was the energy of those there. I felt the bar kind of come together like those moments the song defines. Love was lost and at that same moment I found that after a year in DC, I finally had a good community of friends. People like myself. It was a beautiful realization - then I got out of it and poured some beer.
Two weeks later, I left DC for good.
Everyone said you ain't no good
Then you prove them right
You're leaving tonight
It's over and done
Ain't no sense in trying to wait till the morning comes...."
There's this song that I heard on the radio the day after I left. It was by Ne-Yo and Jennifer Hudson called "Leavin tonight"...basically he wants to stay and she can't forgive it. It was a hot and somewhat unreal day for me. I was driving, for the last time, in his bird shit mobile.
That was nearly 3 months ago.
I went back to New York, kind of cold and depleted in the middle of June. I decided that staying in DC wasn't worth it after moving 3 times in the course of a month. I was exhausted as well, and everywhere I went it was hard to breathe. Also, he kept threatening me and his life and my commitments, like soccer and work. It was terrible.
One day after I got back, I got hired to work as a camp counselor. So, I drove down to DC that thursday to get my stuff from Patricia's place and, against all wishes from all friends, went out to dinner with him. I felt that the way I saw him last was a horrible way to say goodbye, and that we had to face each other if only for a minute. We had dinner and then proceeded to walk around the same 3 blocks in DC for awhile...we talked about our relationship, without fighting really. And i dunno...there was nothin else, just us, the world was rarely in on moments with him. Then we were back in front of the restaurant. We were back to where we started, in more ways than one. I then suggested that we take a new road - to leave things somewhere new, to clear the air, just to not leave it there. We ended up hearing some music and low & behold there was a new orleans style bucket band playing on the corner and people were dancing. We danced for a minute, then talked and ... then we said goodbye a little later. We hugged and I walked away, a new day after a stormy night style.
The next day I started work in upstate NY. Going straight to work after that night was good for me. I got to get all of it off my mind. There were times though that I would nearly cry.
"Cause nothing compares, nothing compares to you"
ohhh man, it feels so weird not tellin him all my thoughts and such. And when I heard from him thursday night that he was leavin our place...sleep wasn't an option.
I remember one night working at Cap Lounge in DC. I remember the song by journey, and the line "a singer in a smokey room, a smell of wine and cheap perfume...for a smile they can share the night...it goes on and on and on and onn"...it was a slow night - but it was the energy of those there. I felt the bar kind of come together like those moments the song defines. Love was lost and at that same moment I found that after a year in DC, I finally had a good community of friends. People like myself. It was a beautiful realization - then I got out of it and poured some beer.
Two weeks later, I left DC for good.