uh
so like a long lost friend, you just dont know what to say. Do I tell you all the big things I have done. Do I tell you all the things I think are wrong in my life. Do I tell you anything? More than anything id like to stress the point that life is nothing more than a series of addictions. Large or small, you crave something till you feel stuck in it, then move on to the next thing. I am in no way implying an addiction of any kind other than life itself. Just saying that, it seems to me, we just move from one thing to another trying to get a fix of some sort till we finally give in and give up. Im at the point I am ready to give in and settle but at the same time, the bitts of settling down I have tasted dont so much fit me. People at my house all the time, going out, staying up late.. I think i am about ready to turn in the towel. At the same time, i dont want to give up. I am ready for some free time and to get myself back more than anything. I have friends that come over a lot and i love them to death but sometimes i feel like i have given up myself to hang out and enjoy life. I want to start working out again (its been months) I want to start eating better and get back on top of things. For instance my yard and my vehicals.. they are all a mess. Im not sure where i am going with this, I just have a lot of stuff I need to vent more than anything else. I also realised that as much as i want a gf and to settle down and all that. It doesnt so much fit in my life plan with my goals. I dont have the time to have a person in my life like that. I cant have everything i suppose. We shall see what the next year brings. I could talk for probably an hour straight right now. but i wont. maybe some other month.