Nov 17, 2004 15:14
first of all i'd like to say...if i could express to you how much you meant to me...i would...but each time i see you're face, i become the stuttering idiot that the world sees me as.
simply shit. simply shit. i am punished for the rest of my life. well not exactly, but close enough. and it all goes back to the fucking dogs. but that's besides the fact. last night i actually put aside the fact that my mother hit me with the cereal box and told i was worthless, and i talked to her. i spilled my heart out about what a dickhead my english teacher was and basically every other teacher and you know what i get...i get sent back to fucking therapy. "i have anger problems and trouble listening." yea fucking right. im not even getting sent back for cutting...for fucking anger problems. yea i've got anger problems, but so does everyone else. my sister told on me that i went on the computer and so that got my mom even more angry. she's so goddamn retarded. and i thought about it today and figured...hey i'm not gonna mind going back to therapy because it wasn't that bad...and i'll be going back to the same woman so i don't have to tell my whole life story over again. and that woman knew more about me than anyone else...anyone of my friends. so whatever. but the reason why i'm being sent back is eating away at me. and her reason was shit...i know the real reason. the real reason why she's sending me back is because she doesn't want to have to deal with me, she doesn't want to have to listen to me complain...she wants all her time to work like the fucking business asshole she is. and you know what...she doesn't want to care about me, i won't care about her. i'm done trying to please her. and now she has another child that hates her. and now me and my sister have so much in common.
after all that shit with mrs. landgrover...i got a c+ in her class. whatever. atleast i passed. english c+, ss c+, art a+, photo b+, creative writing b+, gym f, math f, chemistry f. oh well. i guess i just suck. im going to go eat then sleep. because that's all i'll be doing for the next....forever.