The only person who knew where she was hiding was Nyota, and she’d been sworn to secrecy. As much secrecy as existed on a starship to begin with, and Len didn’t really care who came through the Jeffries tube as long as it wasn’t Jim. Was it wrong to hide from her husband? Possibly. Was it what she was doing? Definitely. She wasn’t ready to face rejection - not from Jim - and not because of a damn transporter accident. It was probably against some regulation somewhere (or a whole page, she didn’t know exactly) for the CMO to simply go AWOL and hide in a Jeffries tube because a she had become a he, and she wasn’t dealing well with her new transition.
Well, she was doing better. Going to the bathroom was a little weird, and she was still too freaked out by the sudden change in her anatomy to really even look at herself naked. She crawled out of the tube during Gamma or Delta shift - never at the same time, in case Jim might be looking for her at a specific time - and got some food, went to the bathroom, and used the decon showers in sickbay to clean herself. If Chapel noticed her coming and going, her head nurse didn’t say anything, either to her or the Captain.
She’d made it four full days living like a hermit (or a scared child) in the Jeffries tubes, wadding her bulky male body in the small space, scratching absently at the growth on her face. She knew how to shave her legs, but she wasn’t ready to go from legs (where it was fairly common to cut yourself and slap a band-aid over it) to her own cheeks, chin, and throat. That was just asking for trouble.
Her only other issue in the tube - other than confined space - was that she missed Jim. She didn’t sleep well when she wasn’t near him. And by near him, she missed the way his body would curve around her smaller one when they slept together, the way his even breathing stirred her bangs and the way his heart beat steady in his chest under her ear. She missed their togetherness. She missed lounging with him, relaxing after a hard day. She missed washing his back in the shower, and she missed his fingers scrubbing her scalp.
Well, she was doing better. Going to the bathroom was a little weird, and she was still too freaked out by the sudden change in her anatomy to really even look at herself naked. She crawled out of the tube during Gamma or Delta shift - never at the same time, in case Jim might be looking for her at a specific time - and got some food, went to the bathroom, and used the decon showers in sickbay to clean herself. If Chapel noticed her coming and going, her head nurse didn’t say anything, either to her or the Captain.
She’d made it four full days living like a hermit (or a scared child) in the Jeffries tubes, wadding her bulky male body in the small space, scratching absently at the growth on her face. She knew how to shave her legs, but she wasn’t ready to go from legs (where it was fairly common to cut yourself and slap a band-aid over it) to her own cheeks, chin, and throat. That was just asking for trouble.
Her only other issue in the tube - other than confined space - was that she missed Jim. She didn’t sleep well when she wasn’t near him. And by near him, she missed the way his body would curve around her smaller one when they slept together, the way his even breathing stirred her bangs and the way his heart beat steady in his chest under her ear. She missed their togetherness. She missed lounging with him, relaxing after a hard day. She missed washing his back in the shower, and she missed his fingers scrubbing her scalp.
She missed her husband something fierce.
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