Looking for a Job? Well, work for us!

[buck_w_fox]

We are Uptons, the leading department store in expensive old haggy ladies apparel only your great grandmother would love! We are looking for motivated hard worked FEMALES to do our selling. Your Male you say? Not a problem, you will be forced to lug 100 Ibs or more daily up to the second floor, kill rats, empty our waste paper baskets full of sanitary napkins with your BARE HANDS, and basically never talk to our sales staff...EVER! Pay is negotiable, mainly because we don't want to pay you..so chances are you will work for nothing. We offer No health benefits, in fact it is required to have your own insurance because our selling floor has mold and aspestice galore..but not to worry the MALES can deal with that ladies :-) (Women get a Hazmat suit for sign on bonus) So if your dumb enough to work for this shot arse company, you can apply whenever electric is working (which is never) or call us at a payphone..we may respond. And one final note..excuse our mess, we're poor and we don't care if you get injured anyway.



It's Uptons time, HIT THE DECK!!! *Crash*

---Just some humour, I worked here for 2 years and felt this should be their ad. It lays in ruin now after being abandoned for 7 years---