weekly overview
well i have to say i ave been substantially sick all week, and only went 2 school a total of 3 days.i went to the doctors today and they said i have sinus infection that will take forever to cure, and then my failure of a gay mom couldnt fill my prescription b/c it was on my dads insurance. WHICH IS SOOO WONDERFUL B/C NOW I CAN BE THE SICKEST LITTLE GIRL IN THE WORLD. moving on though, i was called down to the office to day to poick up a message which said...your mother will be picking u up after school for a doctors appointment...so im like after school, huh? well thats pretty vague , so i go " did they say a specific time?"..." nope, just right after school." so there i am RIGHT AFTER SCHOOL WAITING LIKE AN ASSHOLE for my ride that unbeknownced 2 me isnt coming until like 3:05. so i waited in school for a half hour like a jackass totally annoyed and embarassed, cuz like who wants 2 be at school after school's over? not me.so my mom comes and im like wtf? and shes like blah blah blah its ur dads fault, which it was cuz he doesnt think at all and scheduled my doctors appointment for like 3 sumtihng, and told my mom 2 pick me up at 3 and didnt leave a specific time on the message in the office that he called in. SO basically my dad is just this busy guy who doesnt think about anything at all. Gay, i could have gone home in that time, but no i had 2 sit at school while my dad KNEW i got out at 2:25. ANyways, its friday and i tihnk im gonan hang out w/ seanna and go out and hav a sleepover which will b nice cuz i havent seen her in forever.
next thought, i had a wicked in depth emotional talk w/ bud stevens about life and everything else, and it was so great, and it just made me realize how empty and liek unresponsive ive been w/ my feelings for so long now, and how i havent been able 2 find a friend i can talk 2 about them, which is ridiculous cuz i hav about 8 million friends that i consider close to me, and here comes bud stevens who i went 2 europe w/ and i can tell him my feelings better then i can talk abuot them to any of my best friends...whats wrong w/ that picture? i dont know if i tihnk my friends wont accept my feelings, or if i just think they dont give a shit, or if like maybe i just dont have a close enough relationship w/ any of my friends. anyways i came out of vthat convo totally bittersweet b/c on the 1 hand i had had a truely amazing relieving talk w/ a great guy, and on the other it made me realize there was sucha gap in the relatinoships i have w/ my friends. im not sure how 2 feel, b/c my friends are all cool people, but for the longest time now ive felt like i dont have that 1 best freind that every1 has, which totally makes me feel ungrateful for all the awesome friends i do have/ wicked sad. on the whole im feeling pretty good, despite everytihng i just wrote, i think this is where i just vent tho.
but c every1 on the weekend or in school, party hard*!$^$^%#
next thought, i had a wicked in depth emotional talk w/ bud stevens about life and everything else, and it was so great, and it just made me realize how empty and liek unresponsive ive been w/ my feelings for so long now, and how i havent been able 2 find a friend i can talk 2 about them, which is ridiculous cuz i hav about 8 million friends that i consider close to me, and here comes bud stevens who i went 2 europe w/ and i can tell him my feelings better then i can talk abuot them to any of my best friends...whats wrong w/ that picture? i dont know if i tihnk my friends wont accept my feelings, or if i just think they dont give a shit, or if like maybe i just dont have a close enough relationship w/ any of my friends. anyways i came out of vthat convo totally bittersweet b/c on the 1 hand i had had a truely amazing relieving talk w/ a great guy, and on the other it made me realize there was sucha gap in the relatinoships i have w/ my friends. im not sure how 2 feel, b/c my friends are all cool people, but for the longest time now ive felt like i dont have that 1 best freind that every1 has, which totally makes me feel ungrateful for all the awesome friends i do have/ wicked sad. on the whole im feeling pretty good, despite everytihng i just wrote, i think this is where i just vent tho.
but c every1 on the weekend or in school, party hard*!$^$^%#