"make the right call" is one hell of a parting phrase
with much thanks to those who offered encouragement, i have elected to take spring semester off.
that said, i have moved from the anxiety of having nothing to choose from to the anxiety of having multiple things to choose from. in the past week, i met with several potential advisors to talk about several different projects, and (as expected) got very different vibes from each of them.
the first opportunity will be basically my own project, porting general ideas (and possibly some framework) from a current grad student's work to an environment that matches my expertise. it will be challenging, it will be without clear direction to go at times, and upon success the work would be one of those "very cool, nobody will actually use this research implementation but the ideas may evolve" things.
when the meeting was over, the grad student i was talking to - who grasped very well the situation i was in and the decisions i had ahead of me - wished that i "make the right call". (yes, i intend to; ... wait, shit, that's actually really hard)
the second opportunity is in a project that is just as cool, but more structured and guided. i'd be working with another grad student on his subset of the project, no doubt solving just as interesting problems - probably more likely to produce successful results, but with less "I did this thing" and more "We did this thing" (which, as the first guy pointed out, has its own merits and demerits. (did i mention the first guy is rather awesome))
when talking to the third guy it became clear rather quickly that our interests did not line up, and also we couldn't even pull interesting conversation out of comparing what we did. i guess sometimes you catch fish, sometimes you catch boots.
the fourth guy and i also had somewhat different directions, but vaguely intersecting, and he was good enough to pull an hour's worth of engaging discussion out of our mutual interests. if i were to do the project idea we came up with, it likely wouldn't be as satisfying (or original) as the other ideas, so i won't be going there. he did, however, give a recommendation for another guy, who (after a few cursory readings) seems to achieve very cool goals by methods that don't line up with what i want to do. i can't decide whether i should give his work a chance, or even go to talk to him just to learn about it (what would i say?)...
so, i am basically torn between the first and second choices. (it is probably apparent which one i'm leaning towards, but i've always had reservations about "well you seem to like it better why not go with it" decision-making.)
i am afraid that whatever choice i make the cons of it and the pros of the other one will prove to be the important factors.
that said, i have moved from the anxiety of having nothing to choose from to the anxiety of having multiple things to choose from. in the past week, i met with several potential advisors to talk about several different projects, and (as expected) got very different vibes from each of them.
the first opportunity will be basically my own project, porting general ideas (and possibly some framework) from a current grad student's work to an environment that matches my expertise. it will be challenging, it will be without clear direction to go at times, and upon success the work would be one of those "very cool, nobody will actually use this research implementation but the ideas may evolve" things.
when the meeting was over, the grad student i was talking to - who grasped very well the situation i was in and the decisions i had ahead of me - wished that i "make the right call". (yes, i intend to; ... wait, shit, that's actually really hard)
the second opportunity is in a project that is just as cool, but more structured and guided. i'd be working with another grad student on his subset of the project, no doubt solving just as interesting problems - probably more likely to produce successful results, but with less "I did this thing" and more "We did this thing" (which, as the first guy pointed out, has its own merits and demerits. (did i mention the first guy is rather awesome))
when talking to the third guy it became clear rather quickly that our interests did not line up, and also we couldn't even pull interesting conversation out of comparing what we did. i guess sometimes you catch fish, sometimes you catch boots.
the fourth guy and i also had somewhat different directions, but vaguely intersecting, and he was good enough to pull an hour's worth of engaging discussion out of our mutual interests. if i were to do the project idea we came up with, it likely wouldn't be as satisfying (or original) as the other ideas, so i won't be going there. he did, however, give a recommendation for another guy, who (after a few cursory readings) seems to achieve very cool goals by methods that don't line up with what i want to do. i can't decide whether i should give his work a chance, or even go to talk to him just to learn about it (what would i say?)...
so, i am basically torn between the first and second choices. (it is probably apparent which one i'm leaning towards, but i've always had reservations about "well you seem to like it better why not go with it" decision-making.)
i am afraid that whatever choice i make the cons of it and the pros of the other one will prove to be the important factors.