birthday
My birthday was pretty good. I made it what I needed it to be for me this year: low key and not demanding in any way shape or form.
I woke up with a migraine. That hurt. I put an ice pack on my head, covered my eyes with a blanket and waited for the medication to kick in. The migraine went away before I got into the shower.
Then I went to the doctor. It was a good appointment. I felt really listened to and cared about. I left feeling like I do have a support network that is working to resolve the whole migraines ruining my life problem. I don't feel so alone with this anymore.
My doctor changed my medication slightly and suggested that I go on an "elimination diet". Basically, you cut out anything processed or anything that has ever been suggested to be a migraine trigger. It sort of leaves you eating just rice, vegetables, fruits, tofu and nuts. I'm basically going to end up being vegan again. Isn't that sort of funny?
Then, when my migraines stop for a good amount of time, I can begin adding triggers back to my diet. One possible trigger at a time. And, I can only really add one back a week, because apparently triggers can sort of add up in your system (I didn't know that, I thought there was a direct sort of cause and effect). So, a little bit of dairy in my tea every day COULD in fact trigger a migraine by the end of the week. I don't know how I feel about it. But, I also don't know how I feel about continuing to get daily migraines. I guess it's okay because it's only a short-term thing. It's not like I am committing to be some sort of uber healthy vegan nun for the rest of my life or anything.
Then, my mom and I went out for lunch. I decided that since it was my birthday, I wouldn't start the elimination diet JUST yet. I had a hummus sandwich (on the diet I'm not allowed wheat until I add it back in), iced tea, and half an apple strudel. It was all quite delicious. Having lunch with my mom was really nice too. I love my mom.
Then my mom and I walked across the street and saw the most lovely tea pot and mugs and dishes. They were white and had the most beautiful black pattern on them: monkeys! I bought the tea pot, two mugs and two plates with the money my uncle gave me for my birthday. My mom then bought me the two matching bowls.
Then my brother and I went out to Beau Photo and he bought me a lomo camera. It's the action sampler. The sample photos in the store looked pretty cool. We picked it over any of the other lomos because we both agreed it was the best. The 35mm Holga took photos that were just a little bit too good. The coloursplash was also really cool, but it was pretty expensive. I was torn between the coloursplash and the action sampler... but, I think the action sampler is going to be pretty fun for the summer. It also looks SO freakin' cool. And I really like the sound it makes. So, that made me really happy. My brother is awesome.
After that, I think I had a nap. Then I woke up at 9:30pm and my mom had made me dinner. She made a soup with FRESH vegetables (it was delicious) and she also made artichokes. I think artichokes are the coolest things ever. I was hoping to eat artichokes on my birthday, but I didn't actually tell anyone that. So, my mom read my mind (in a good way) and that was really cool.
After dinner, mommy and daddy gave me my birthday present. I got very expensive makeup. Now I won't have to feel so teenagery... I like covering up my acne with makeup. I figure, if it won't go away, why not cover it up? Everyone else seems to! I have more confidence when I wear concealer. Nothing heavy. All the makeup is really light. You can totally still tell I have acne... it's jusy not as in your face red. Just enough to make me feel like I can actually have conversations with people without being embarrassed about my face.
Then my brother and I went out to Denny's to take advantage of their free birthday meal offer. We had a pretty awesome time. Waffles are so much better than birthday cake. My waffles had strawberry sauce and whipped cream on them. So delicious. Brother and I talked about odd political theories. It was good times. Also, our favourite waiter was there.
Aaron showed up to say hi. We hung out in the Denny's parking lot for a while. Aaron gave me a cactus. It is VERY cute.
Then I came home, watched an episode of Aqua Teen Hunger Force (that show really doesn't make any sense at all!!!), and now I am writing this.
Great birthday. It was nice not having to host anything or make plans. I just got to do what I wanted to do, when I felt like it. I didn't have to worry about letting anyone down or acting a certain way. It was sort of perfect. I was even able to spend a good couple hours napping... and I wouldn't have been able to have done that if I'd made plans. I also got to spend pretty much my entire birthday with my family. My family has been really supportive to me lately, and it has really meant a lot to me and helped me a lot. It's nice to know that there are people that will help me and love me no matter what.
Don't get me wrong, I adore hosting. I love being a hostess. I love aprons and cooking and baking and tea making. I love serving. I love being happy and chipper. I like being awake. I like having a good time. But... you know... sometimes it's nice to just take a day for yourself. Sometimes it's nice to just do exactly what you want to do and not have to worry about other people.
A few of my friends didn't get that. One acted pretty rude to me this morning... but, him and I have been tense lately anyway due to his and his girlfriend's ability to cause unnecessary drama amongst my other acquaintances. There was also absolutely no way that I was going to some vegan restaurant or eating vegan cake on my birthday. And it's not because I don't like vegan food or vegan cakes. Hell, I only really cook vegan for myself. And, the meal my mom ended up cooking for me tonight WAS vegan. But, that's not the point. In fact, if any other vegan had thrown me a surprise party and there had only been vegan food there, I would have been so thrilled I can't even imagine how happy I would have been. But, I don't like it when people are just so god damned militant that they can't even bend the smallest bit for other people on their special days, even if it doesn't involve them actually personally bending at all. Or if "friends" invite a seriously lethargic person who is dealing with unexplainable pain out somewhere for that person's birthday, and the person isn't up to it, and then the "friend" gets all insulted and takes it personally... omg, lay off. How about you trying to deal with a migraine every day for a week and then tell me if you want to commit to anything or go out anywhere. I also had a couple friends invite me out to do non-birthday related things, and that sort of ticked me off a little bit. If you're going to call me on my birthday, you should probably ask me what I feel like doing. Or, if you've thought of something you'd like to do for me because you know it'll be special, well... that's a whole lot different than inviting me out somewhere that you just want to go to. Oh dear. I am a doormat for 364 days of the year. I always have been. I probably always will be. It would just be so nice if everyone who takes advantage of my doormatness (I don't usually mind that, honestly, I'm happy to give my friendship and love unselfishly most of the time) would turn the tables at least once every 365 days.
The point is that birthdays shouldn't be about other people's needs. They shouldn't be about catering to your friends on your hands and knees. They should be about actually celebrating someone's life, the way that person wants to celebrate it. There were a couple other friends who I felt let down by too. But, a couple let downs wasn't enough to even slightly tarnish what a great birthday this has been.
Mostly, everyone gave me the space I needed while still showing me they cared. Thank you to everyone who sent me facebook birthday wishes. Thank you to everyone who sent me personal messages of concern (Lauren, I love you. Louise, I adore you too.). Thank you to everyone who keeps supporting me even though I have been so distant (Dave, your kindness, advice and willingness to share your own experiences has really got me through some of the worst days lately). And thank you to my wonderful family. Thanks to my brother who keeps reminding me to be happy. And thank you to Aaron who showed up and hung out with me outside of Denny's for a bit and gave me a seriously cute cactus.
I had a great birthday. *love*
I woke up with a migraine. That hurt. I put an ice pack on my head, covered my eyes with a blanket and waited for the medication to kick in. The migraine went away before I got into the shower.
Then I went to the doctor. It was a good appointment. I felt really listened to and cared about. I left feeling like I do have a support network that is working to resolve the whole migraines ruining my life problem. I don't feel so alone with this anymore.
My doctor changed my medication slightly and suggested that I go on an "elimination diet". Basically, you cut out anything processed or anything that has ever been suggested to be a migraine trigger. It sort of leaves you eating just rice, vegetables, fruits, tofu and nuts. I'm basically going to end up being vegan again. Isn't that sort of funny?
Then, when my migraines stop for a good amount of time, I can begin adding triggers back to my diet. One possible trigger at a time. And, I can only really add one back a week, because apparently triggers can sort of add up in your system (I didn't know that, I thought there was a direct sort of cause and effect). So, a little bit of dairy in my tea every day COULD in fact trigger a migraine by the end of the week. I don't know how I feel about it. But, I also don't know how I feel about continuing to get daily migraines. I guess it's okay because it's only a short-term thing. It's not like I am committing to be some sort of uber healthy vegan nun for the rest of my life or anything.
Then, my mom and I went out for lunch. I decided that since it was my birthday, I wouldn't start the elimination diet JUST yet. I had a hummus sandwich (on the diet I'm not allowed wheat until I add it back in), iced tea, and half an apple strudel. It was all quite delicious. Having lunch with my mom was really nice too. I love my mom.
Then my mom and I walked across the street and saw the most lovely tea pot and mugs and dishes. They were white and had the most beautiful black pattern on them: monkeys! I bought the tea pot, two mugs and two plates with the money my uncle gave me for my birthday. My mom then bought me the two matching bowls.
Then my brother and I went out to Beau Photo and he bought me a lomo camera. It's the action sampler. The sample photos in the store looked pretty cool. We picked it over any of the other lomos because we both agreed it was the best. The 35mm Holga took photos that were just a little bit too good. The coloursplash was also really cool, but it was pretty expensive. I was torn between the coloursplash and the action sampler... but, I think the action sampler is going to be pretty fun for the summer. It also looks SO freakin' cool. And I really like the sound it makes. So, that made me really happy. My brother is awesome.
After that, I think I had a nap. Then I woke up at 9:30pm and my mom had made me dinner. She made a soup with FRESH vegetables (it was delicious) and she also made artichokes. I think artichokes are the coolest things ever. I was hoping to eat artichokes on my birthday, but I didn't actually tell anyone that. So, my mom read my mind (in a good way) and that was really cool.
After dinner, mommy and daddy gave me my birthday present. I got very expensive makeup. Now I won't have to feel so teenagery... I like covering up my acne with makeup. I figure, if it won't go away, why not cover it up? Everyone else seems to! I have more confidence when I wear concealer. Nothing heavy. All the makeup is really light. You can totally still tell I have acne... it's jusy not as in your face red. Just enough to make me feel like I can actually have conversations with people without being embarrassed about my face.
Then my brother and I went out to Denny's to take advantage of their free birthday meal offer. We had a pretty awesome time. Waffles are so much better than birthday cake. My waffles had strawberry sauce and whipped cream on them. So delicious. Brother and I talked about odd political theories. It was good times. Also, our favourite waiter was there.
Aaron showed up to say hi. We hung out in the Denny's parking lot for a while. Aaron gave me a cactus. It is VERY cute.
Then I came home, watched an episode of Aqua Teen Hunger Force (that show really doesn't make any sense at all!!!), and now I am writing this.
Great birthday. It was nice not having to host anything or make plans. I just got to do what I wanted to do, when I felt like it. I didn't have to worry about letting anyone down or acting a certain way. It was sort of perfect. I was even able to spend a good couple hours napping... and I wouldn't have been able to have done that if I'd made plans. I also got to spend pretty much my entire birthday with my family. My family has been really supportive to me lately, and it has really meant a lot to me and helped me a lot. It's nice to know that there are people that will help me and love me no matter what.
Don't get me wrong, I adore hosting. I love being a hostess. I love aprons and cooking and baking and tea making. I love serving. I love being happy and chipper. I like being awake. I like having a good time. But... you know... sometimes it's nice to just take a day for yourself. Sometimes it's nice to just do exactly what you want to do and not have to worry about other people.
A few of my friends didn't get that. One acted pretty rude to me this morning... but, him and I have been tense lately anyway due to his and his girlfriend's ability to cause unnecessary drama amongst my other acquaintances. There was also absolutely no way that I was going to some vegan restaurant or eating vegan cake on my birthday. And it's not because I don't like vegan food or vegan cakes. Hell, I only really cook vegan for myself. And, the meal my mom ended up cooking for me tonight WAS vegan. But, that's not the point. In fact, if any other vegan had thrown me a surprise party and there had only been vegan food there, I would have been so thrilled I can't even imagine how happy I would have been. But, I don't like it when people are just so god damned militant that they can't even bend the smallest bit for other people on their special days, even if it doesn't involve them actually personally bending at all. Or if "friends" invite a seriously lethargic person who is dealing with unexplainable pain out somewhere for that person's birthday, and the person isn't up to it, and then the "friend" gets all insulted and takes it personally... omg, lay off. How about you trying to deal with a migraine every day for a week and then tell me if you want to commit to anything or go out anywhere. I also had a couple friends invite me out to do non-birthday related things, and that sort of ticked me off a little bit. If you're going to call me on my birthday, you should probably ask me what I feel like doing. Or, if you've thought of something you'd like to do for me because you know it'll be special, well... that's a whole lot different than inviting me out somewhere that you just want to go to. Oh dear. I am a doormat for 364 days of the year. I always have been. I probably always will be. It would just be so nice if everyone who takes advantage of my doormatness (I don't usually mind that, honestly, I'm happy to give my friendship and love unselfishly most of the time) would turn the tables at least once every 365 days.
The point is that birthdays shouldn't be about other people's needs. They shouldn't be about catering to your friends on your hands and knees. They should be about actually celebrating someone's life, the way that person wants to celebrate it. There were a couple other friends who I felt let down by too. But, a couple let downs wasn't enough to even slightly tarnish what a great birthday this has been.
Mostly, everyone gave me the space I needed while still showing me they cared. Thank you to everyone who sent me facebook birthday wishes. Thank you to everyone who sent me personal messages of concern (Lauren, I love you. Louise, I adore you too.). Thank you to everyone who keeps supporting me even though I have been so distant (Dave, your kindness, advice and willingness to share your own experiences has really got me through some of the worst days lately). And thank you to my wonderful family. Thanks to my brother who keeps reminding me to be happy. And thank you to Aaron who showed up and hung out with me outside of Denny's for a bit and gave me a seriously cute cactus.
I had a great birthday. *love*