Here it is.. less than 2 days from a day I hate
Well.. it's nearing the dawn of the day before the day I totally think needs to be deleted from the Calendar... I so hate Valentines Day with every fiber of my body. any guess as to why? Oh I am sure you can guess why. It's because everytime I think of that day I think of how everyone has someone special but then when it comes to me I am alone and wondering what is so wrong with me. What am I? Some diseas? Siome repellant of love? Oh well, a lonely heart is WAY better than a broken heart let me testify to that one. I still have to this very day not forgiven someone that I thought was to be the one I was to be happy with forever. They knew how much I loved them and how much I cared for them. I dont care if it was just "text" or "internet words that could be a lie and never knew it" I dont care that it was a long distance thing... what I DO care about is how my heart and feelings got thrown away like they were a cheap inexpensive disposable item of no value. I may not ever find a way to forgive her but it sure would be nice if I could erase every though, every memory and everything in my mind and heart of her but somehow that seems impossible. Nothing I've tried has worked. but if you ever read this... I hope you understand that youwere loved.. you were cared for and you were beautiful to me. But now.. i could care less. You once asked why we never talk anymore but you should know why. It's c\because I dont feel like you can honestly type it and mean it if you say you care about me. I'll forever see that as a bald faced lie towards me. Just do me a favor and let me rest in pieces like the song Saliva sings so well. the words to that song are perfect for me cause I wish that you would find a way to make this go away and let me rest in pieces. I remember now that I made a promise that lasted until June but you know what... I'm breaking that promise right now. I dont want anyone else now. I want to just live a single man's life where I know my heart is safe from being torn apart. Oh and one last thing... Thanks for showing me that love is a toxic weapon used to kill a person's heart and mind. It sure was effective in destroying me.