"May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground, carry on."
I’m starting to get annoyed with this whole feelings deal. I don’t know what more I can do to put them behind me. I’ve bonded with girls outside of work, gone on platonic dates with my male friends, I’ve signed up for specific volunteer events to spend time with the new cutie at work, my weekends are also filled with work I bring home and assignments for my class… But at the end of the days, I set my TV timer, turn off my bedroom lights, close my eyes in the dark and it’s still him on my mind. It’s just ridiculous, really. I finally deactivated my Facebook account tonight. As pathetic as it sounds, that is the only connection I have to him and I’m not prepared to delete him from my friends list to prevent myself from seeing those updates. Instead, I just took myself off the Facebook map for awhile. Steven… I don’t know what he did to me, but damn. I only wish I knew then what I know now. I can’t help but wonder how life would have been different if I had this mind set a year ago. I think that's what makes it harder to let go.
My song for today: Carry On (acoustic) by Fun.
“You swore and said
‘We are not,
We are not shining stars’
This I know,
I never said we are
Though I've never been through hell like that
I've closed enough windows
to know you can never look back”
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