TV Guide
There have been a couple of cosmetic changes in the last week to the Progressive Boink staff, and as a contributing editor to America's number one magazine TV Guide I offer up my "Cheers" and "Jeers."
Jeers! to B
for trimming his formerly evil Ramses goatee into a much more respectable corporate fuzz. The author (who is also me) was sitting here one night thinking, "Jesus, do I want a big lump of hair moving around every time I nod my head down?" and shaved it off, thinking that much like Olive Oyl everybody I know wants a clean shaven man. Immediately following every girl with an opinion I value regarding my appearance goes "aw, I liked it!" So now I'm trying to grow it back. At least I get about a month before I have decide if I'm going for the Snitsky or the Tomko.
Cheers! to Lindy
for making the move from blonde to red. I have three major life goals: 1) become a successful writer, 2) become a Harlem Globetrotter, and 3) make every girl I like dye their hair black. I don't know what it is. I'm not a fan of African-American or Hispanic girls and that's their default. Maybe it's a deeper sociological problem but when I see blonde hair I want to paint it black. And don't even get me started on red doors.
I'm always drawn to natural blondes, too, which is one of the great inner-personal ironies of my life. My closest female friends and lovers (working on about a 2:5 ratio) are blondes. And since I am obsessive compulsive I will consider this my fourteen butterknife touches to Lindy's head and admit that red is a wonderful step that is both acceptable and enjoyable, and I hope it sticks around. I will now spend 20 minutes pretending I'm Spider-Man.
twhip thwip
Jeers! to Nick
for oh i don't know
Jeers! to B
for trimming his formerly evil Ramses goatee into a much more respectable corporate fuzz. The author (who is also me) was sitting here one night thinking, "Jesus, do I want a big lump of hair moving around every time I nod my head down?" and shaved it off, thinking that much like Olive Oyl everybody I know wants a clean shaven man. Immediately following every girl with an opinion I value regarding my appearance goes "aw, I liked it!" So now I'm trying to grow it back. At least I get about a month before I have decide if I'm going for the Snitsky or the Tomko.
Cheers! to Lindy
for making the move from blonde to red. I have three major life goals: 1) become a successful writer, 2) become a Harlem Globetrotter, and 3) make every girl I like dye their hair black. I don't know what it is. I'm not a fan of African-American or Hispanic girls and that's their default. Maybe it's a deeper sociological problem but when I see blonde hair I want to paint it black. And don't even get me started on red doors.
I'm always drawn to natural blondes, too, which is one of the great inner-personal ironies of my life. My closest female friends and lovers (working on about a 2:5 ratio) are blondes. And since I am obsessive compulsive I will consider this my fourteen butterknife touches to Lindy's head and admit that red is a wonderful step that is both acceptable and enjoyable, and I hope it sticks around. I will now spend 20 minutes pretending I'm Spider-Man.
twhip thwip
Jeers! to Nick
for oh i don't know