Karen's Prize (14-20)
It's about time I got back to this snark. I've been really busy with art show prep and the like.
So, Karen's going on to the countywide and statewide spelling competitions. Let's see how it turns out!
Chapter 14
OH SNAP. Hannie and Nancy are hanging out with Karen's "best enemies!" Oh hell naw that is NOT gonna go down! Karen decides to just stop talking to everyone to deal with the trauma of this sight, but at recess she finally goes up to Hannie and Nancy all "Okay you are playing hopscotch with me RIGHT now." Hannie's like "How come you're not spelling everything I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE BEE QUEEN HUHHHHH." Karen says "It's Queen Bee, and you are being a toad." I loled. Karen's so blunt. xD Nancy tells her that all she's been doing lately is walking around acting like a bigshot and it's fucking annoying. Karen goes, "Well some friend you are!!!" and digs herself into a deeper hole. This is the first of way too many times Karen will be branded an "ex-Musketeer." She huffs off to play hopscotch by herself and is a bitch to her boyfriend Ricky (but this is before he became her boyfriend).
Chapter 15
Karen heads off to the contest and muses over how she misses Hannie and Nancy, but only because they're not there to cheer for her. Karen gets lucky again because she's not first and the first kid gets the one word she can't spell. Karen gets "anticipate" and as she's getting ready to spell, Emily begins to cry and she gets distracted, but she still gets the word anyway. She wins the bee with "dictionary" and her family comes up to cheer her on, including Emily. But she screams "OMG EMILY YOU ALMOST RUINED EVERYTHING!!!!" at her and Emily cries. Good job Karen.
Chapter 16
Karen makes up with Hannie and Nancy by finally shutting up about spelling, but it's all ruined when they go to play hopscotch and Karen decides to make it a contest. Nancy's like FOR PETE'S SAKE KAREN NOT EVERYTHING HAS TO BE A CONTEST" and they tell her to go to hell. Karen goes into the library to look up words and goes on about winning again, proving she hasn't learned anything.
Chapter 17
Statewide contest time. Karen twirls around in front of Moosie talking about how much of a TV star she looks like 'cause she's gonna be on TV if she wins. Karen examines the competition and goes "Too bad they're all going to lose." Karen meets Melissa, her chief competition who is actually nice and not snobbish and egotistical at all, and is a rude little brat to her all "Gtfo I'm studying" and "Didn't she know *I'm* the one who's going to win?" I smell foreshadowing!!!!
Chapter 18 (Karen gets a karmic retribution)
Karen decides to use the introductory speech by the MC as a chance to determine how long it's going to take her to win, while imagining herself as a beauty pageant contestant (has Karen ever entered Little Miss Stoneybrook? If not, I'm shocked). Karen gets the word "royalty" and is all "That's what I'm gonna feel like when I win!" Oh shut UP already. The contest ends with Karen and Melissa as the last ones standing HERE IT COMES!!!! Karen starts thinking about her acceptance speech for the national contest...HEEEERE IT COMES!!!! THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR!!!! Karen gets "convertible" and spells it C-O-N-V-E-R-T-A-B-L-E. BOOM, HEADSHOT!
Chapter 19
Karen sulkily congratulates Melissa on her win and rejects her family's attempts to celebrate because I DIDN'T *WIN* THOUGH, DAMMIT! Because first-runner up in the entire fucking state is obviously a bullshit accomplishment that means nothing okay. Karen starts crying even though everyone's super-proud of her but "They do not understand at all." For god's sake, Karen!
Chapter 20
Kristy reminds Karen she's been in like seven contests and won them ALL except for ONE and THAT MEANS SOMETHING. I feel like Karen is just BSing her apology for being a sore winner, because this is book 11 and she displays plenty of behavior like this throughout soooo many other books. Before going to bed she plans on how to rope her hivemind back in. The end.
So, Karen's going on to the countywide and statewide spelling competitions. Let's see how it turns out!
Chapter 14
OH SNAP. Hannie and Nancy are hanging out with Karen's "best enemies!" Oh hell naw that is NOT gonna go down! Karen decides to just stop talking to everyone to deal with the trauma of this sight, but at recess she finally goes up to Hannie and Nancy all "Okay you are playing hopscotch with me RIGHT now." Hannie's like "How come you're not spelling everything I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE BEE QUEEN HUHHHHH." Karen says "It's Queen Bee, and you are being a toad." I loled. Karen's so blunt. xD Nancy tells her that all she's been doing lately is walking around acting like a bigshot and it's fucking annoying. Karen goes, "Well some friend you are!!!" and digs herself into a deeper hole. This is the first of way too many times Karen will be branded an "ex-Musketeer." She huffs off to play hopscotch by herself and is a bitch to her boyfriend Ricky (but this is before he became her boyfriend).
Chapter 15
Karen heads off to the contest and muses over how she misses Hannie and Nancy, but only because they're not there to cheer for her. Karen gets lucky again because she's not first and the first kid gets the one word she can't spell. Karen gets "anticipate" and as she's getting ready to spell, Emily begins to cry and she gets distracted, but she still gets the word anyway. She wins the bee with "dictionary" and her family comes up to cheer her on, including Emily. But she screams "OMG EMILY YOU ALMOST RUINED EVERYTHING!!!!" at her and Emily cries. Good job Karen.
Chapter 16
Karen makes up with Hannie and Nancy by finally shutting up about spelling, but it's all ruined when they go to play hopscotch and Karen decides to make it a contest. Nancy's like FOR PETE'S SAKE KAREN NOT EVERYTHING HAS TO BE A CONTEST" and they tell her to go to hell. Karen goes into the library to look up words and goes on about winning again, proving she hasn't learned anything.
Chapter 17
Statewide contest time. Karen twirls around in front of Moosie talking about how much of a TV star she looks like 'cause she's gonna be on TV if she wins. Karen examines the competition and goes "Too bad they're all going to lose." Karen meets Melissa, her chief competition who is actually nice and not snobbish and egotistical at all, and is a rude little brat to her all "Gtfo I'm studying" and "Didn't she know *I'm* the one who's going to win?" I smell foreshadowing!!!!
Chapter 18 (Karen gets a karmic retribution)
Karen decides to use the introductory speech by the MC as a chance to determine how long it's going to take her to win, while imagining herself as a beauty pageant contestant (has Karen ever entered Little Miss Stoneybrook? If not, I'm shocked). Karen gets the word "royalty" and is all "That's what I'm gonna feel like when I win!" Oh shut UP already. The contest ends with Karen and Melissa as the last ones standing HERE IT COMES!!!! Karen starts thinking about her acceptance speech for the national contest...HEEEERE IT COMES!!!! THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR!!!! Karen gets "convertible" and spells it C-O-N-V-E-R-T-A-B-L-E. BOOM, HEADSHOT!
Chapter 19
Karen sulkily congratulates Melissa on her win and rejects her family's attempts to celebrate because I DIDN'T *WIN* THOUGH, DAMMIT! Because first-runner up in the entire fucking state is obviously a bullshit accomplishment that means nothing okay. Karen starts crying even though everyone's super-proud of her but "They do not understand at all." For god's sake, Karen!
Chapter 20
Kristy reminds Karen she's been in like seven contests and won them ALL except for ONE and THAT MEANS SOMETHING. I feel like Karen is just BSing her apology for being a sore winner, because this is book 11 and she displays plenty of behavior like this throughout soooo many other books. Before going to bed she plans on how to rope her hivemind back in. The end.