Karen's Baby (14-20) (SPECIAL SURRPISE AT THE END!!!!)
There is a ~SPECIAL SURPRISE~ at the end of this snark! (: Gotta read the whole snark to find it, so let's get crackin'!
Chapter 14
Daniel's doing fine and will be coming home soon yaaaaay. Nancy tells Karen she has all morning to play, so Karen of the One-Tracked Mind goes OKAY LET'S TRY TO SELL OUR BABY STUFF! Karen, can't you do ANYTHING unrelated to babies just for ONCE? Karen drags her hivemind and Kristy along and they go door-to-door peddling their baby stuff. Nancy's trench coat in the illustration is AWESOME. They go to Mrs. Papadakis' house and wtf she doesn't have a baby. Sari is TWO. But she buys a mobile out of pity. Then they go to the houses of more people who don't have babies and are like WHAT ARE WE DOING WROOOOONG??? Mr. Face, I'd like to introduce you to my good friend Mr. Palm. HELLO MR. PALM! Karen blames Kristy for it wtf she didn't do anything! But I like seeing Kristy getting blamed anyway because I do not like her. They finally sell something when they go to the house of someone who has an ACTUAL BABY! OMG, ISN'T THAT WEIRD?!
Chapter 15
Mrs. Dawes comes home and Daniel will soon follow. Karen is very very alarmed by the fact that Mrs. Dawes is fat after she's just been pregnant, and she runs to Lisa all "MOMMY, FIX HER!" Lisa's like "Chill out she's supposed to be that way." Nancy's all done being scared about Daniel and they prepare for his homecoming.
Chapter 16
Karen just does not see how she can wait all day for someone else's baby to arrive and because she's so obsessed with someone else's baby she disrupts class multiple times. When she gets home OH SNAP, Daniel's STILL not home. But at least she's getting her friends to play something unrelated to babies. FINALLY! And then finally, FINALLY Mrs. Dawes arrives with Daniel. The girls admire his TEENY WIDDLE FACE and blah blah who cares. Karen's mention of Daniel being no bigger than Hyacynthia somewhat makes me wonder if she's gonna try to dress him in her clothes. I'm surprised Karen doesn't photobomb all the pictures. Me and Lightning tried to do that at my cousin's wedding but I got bored with it.
Chapter 17
Karen decides that now she really truly just HAS to have her own baby sibling!!! Kristy comes over to babysit and she finds Karen's lists of things for the baby she thinks she's getting. Kristy's like "Well I hope these are for a pretend baby 'cause you know you're not getting a real one" and Karen's like "YES I AM!!!" Then Kristy asks her does she want a BABY, or does she want to be a BIG SISTER, because she already has two younger siblings. And Karen says "Both," but in actuality she just wants a baby. Because Nancy has one and Nancy's not allowed to have things she doesn't. Kristy reminds her that her little siblings can actually DO things and she can play with them and can't do those things with a little baby, and she offers to let Karen help her take care of Emily. Awww. Kristy decides to peddle Karen's baby things to the BSC and Karen's like HEY WAIT, YOU MEAN I'M SUPPOSED TO SELL BABY THINGS TO PEOPLE WHO HAVE AND TAKE CARE OF BABIES? WHAT A NOVEL IDEA!!!!
Chapter 18
Nancy has her mom bring Daniel in for Show and Share. Nancy's outfit in the illustration is AWESOME and Daniel is SO ADORABLE. The class asks Nancy questions, and Karen answers ALL of them for her. Every single one. Until Pamela's like "We're asking NANCY, not you." GO PAMELA GO!!! Now that I have the Snark Goggles on, bringing a baby to show and tell is kind of weird. It's not like none of them have seen babies before.
Chapter 19
Karen finds out babies are actually kind of annoying, she can't actually play with them or teach them anything because they're too young to give a damn, and they do annoying things like cry and shriek and shit and barf and she's like "Ewww k maybe I don't want a baby anymore." Just like those scare-em-straights on the Maury show! Also the BSC bought all the rest of the baby stuff.
Chapter 20
Karen goes to Nancy's house for something liekrlyimportant. Daniel is still adorable. Nancy dubs Karen Daniel's "fairy godsister" and Nancy is a really nice friend. She knew Karen was jealous of her the whole time and calls Karen "Daniel's other big sister." Awwwww and awwwww some more. Daniel throws up on Karen's good dress. The end.
SURPRISE AT THE END:
REQUEST A SNARK! I'm all out of good snark material and I really don't feel like taking a month long break until I get new Karen books. So I'm gonna let youuuuu request snarks! Here are the Karen books I have that I have not snarked:
Karen's Doll, Karen's Prize, Karen's Wedding, Karen's Campout, Karen's Plane Trip, Karen's Sleepover
Request what you want me to snark next and we'll go from there. After about 2 more snarks I'm taking some time off until I get new books.
Chapter 14
Daniel's doing fine and will be coming home soon yaaaaay. Nancy tells Karen she has all morning to play, so Karen of the One-Tracked Mind goes OKAY LET'S TRY TO SELL OUR BABY STUFF! Karen, can't you do ANYTHING unrelated to babies just for ONCE? Karen drags her hivemind and Kristy along and they go door-to-door peddling their baby stuff. Nancy's trench coat in the illustration is AWESOME. They go to Mrs. Papadakis' house and wtf she doesn't have a baby. Sari is TWO. But she buys a mobile out of pity. Then they go to the houses of more people who don't have babies and are like WHAT ARE WE DOING WROOOOONG??? Mr. Face, I'd like to introduce you to my good friend Mr. Palm. HELLO MR. PALM! Karen blames Kristy for it wtf she didn't do anything! But I like seeing Kristy getting blamed anyway because I do not like her. They finally sell something when they go to the house of someone who has an ACTUAL BABY! OMG, ISN'T THAT WEIRD?!
Chapter 15
Mrs. Dawes comes home and Daniel will soon follow. Karen is very very alarmed by the fact that Mrs. Dawes is fat after she's just been pregnant, and she runs to Lisa all "MOMMY, FIX HER!" Lisa's like "Chill out she's supposed to be that way." Nancy's all done being scared about Daniel and they prepare for his homecoming.
Chapter 16
Karen just does not see how she can wait all day for someone else's baby to arrive and because she's so obsessed with someone else's baby she disrupts class multiple times. When she gets home OH SNAP, Daniel's STILL not home. But at least she's getting her friends to play something unrelated to babies. FINALLY! And then finally, FINALLY Mrs. Dawes arrives with Daniel. The girls admire his TEENY WIDDLE FACE and blah blah who cares. Karen's mention of Daniel being no bigger than Hyacynthia somewhat makes me wonder if she's gonna try to dress him in her clothes. I'm surprised Karen doesn't photobomb all the pictures. Me and Lightning tried to do that at my cousin's wedding but I got bored with it.
Chapter 17
Karen decides that now she really truly just HAS to have her own baby sibling!!! Kristy comes over to babysit and she finds Karen's lists of things for the baby she thinks she's getting. Kristy's like "Well I hope these are for a pretend baby 'cause you know you're not getting a real one" and Karen's like "YES I AM!!!" Then Kristy asks her does she want a BABY, or does she want to be a BIG SISTER, because she already has two younger siblings. And Karen says "Both," but in actuality she just wants a baby. Because Nancy has one and Nancy's not allowed to have things she doesn't. Kristy reminds her that her little siblings can actually DO things and she can play with them and can't do those things with a little baby, and she offers to let Karen help her take care of Emily. Awww. Kristy decides to peddle Karen's baby things to the BSC and Karen's like HEY WAIT, YOU MEAN I'M SUPPOSED TO SELL BABY THINGS TO PEOPLE WHO HAVE AND TAKE CARE OF BABIES? WHAT A NOVEL IDEA!!!!
Chapter 18
Nancy has her mom bring Daniel in for Show and Share. Nancy's outfit in the illustration is AWESOME and Daniel is SO ADORABLE. The class asks Nancy questions, and Karen answers ALL of them for her. Every single one. Until Pamela's like "We're asking NANCY, not you." GO PAMELA GO!!! Now that I have the Snark Goggles on, bringing a baby to show and tell is kind of weird. It's not like none of them have seen babies before.
Chapter 19
Karen finds out babies are actually kind of annoying, she can't actually play with them or teach them anything because they're too young to give a damn, and they do annoying things like cry and shriek and shit and barf and she's like "Ewww k maybe I don't want a baby anymore." Just like those scare-em-straights on the Maury show! Also the BSC bought all the rest of the baby stuff.
Chapter 20
Karen goes to Nancy's house for something liekrlyimportant. Daniel is still adorable. Nancy dubs Karen Daniel's "fairy godsister" and Nancy is a really nice friend. She knew Karen was jealous of her the whole time and calls Karen "Daniel's other big sister." Awwwww and awwwww some more. Daniel throws up on Karen's good dress. The end.
SURPRISE AT THE END:
REQUEST A SNARK! I'm all out of good snark material and I really don't feel like taking a month long break until I get new Karen books. So I'm gonna let youuuuu request snarks! Here are the Karen books I have that I have not snarked:
Karen's Doll, Karen's Prize, Karen's Wedding, Karen's Campout, Karen's Plane Trip, Karen's Sleepover
Request what you want me to snark next and we'll go from there. After about 2 more snarks I'm taking some time off until I get new books.