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More snark because I don't want to get a full night of sleep before I have to be on my feet for six hours, and then babysit (omg, babysitting!!!!1). Yeah.
Last time, Karen is on the phone too damn much, calls 900 numbers every day, more than once, even, and will cut a bitch if they get near the phone while she's on it.
Watch out, here comes some FORESHADOWING. For some reason, I feel like that should be subtle, but this isn't. At all. Hannie and Nancy come over to make more phone calls. Really.
"'You will be the center of attention this month. Use your time wisely and well.'"
HMM. I wonder if that's good or bad? At this point, I really can't tell! I mean, everyone's getting pretty bitchy about her hogging the phone already, could it be about that? Hannie and Nancy's are vague and preposterous at the same time, even though Karen's was spot on, for some reason. Huh.
After calling the Horoscope Hotline, they decide to call the Joke-A-Day one, but Bobby calls. I don't know about y'all, but if a boy called my house when in second grade, I would have freaked out. But I was shy and at a new school, so what do I know. Anyway, as a group, the Three Musketeers were stumped, because they're an entity. After the joke, they call Addie, the girl in the wheelchair who always has stickers and is really smart and articulate because you can't just be normal in Stoneybrook, you have to be SPESHUL. Another call comes in, and it's actually important, but Nannie wasn't home and there wasn't a notepad to take a message on, and being a total idiot lazyass, Karen doesn't ask the person to wait so she can find one. She just decides that she'll remember to tell Nannie later, and that's that.
Illustration! Hannie is INCREDIBLY excited about the fact that Karen is on the phone. She's doing a :D face. Nancy is less enthused about the whole thing, and Karen is sitting down, still talking on the phone. She and Nancy appear to have no legs. They just . . . taper off into oblivion. Whatever.
Hannie and Nancy talk to Addie after Karen is done, because they totally didn't just see each other at school an hour earlier. A classmate of David Michael's calls about homework, but he isn't home so Karen tells him that she'll have DM call him back later, even though she'll forget, of course. Kristy comes in and wants to use the phone, but Karen sounds IMPORTANT when she says she needs to make another one, so Kristy just says her call can wait. Because seven-year-olds make important calls all the time. I was in communication with the governor at that point in my life, and everyone in Stoneybrook knows everyone else, so she could actually be calling the mayor or something.
Either the redial button wasn't invented at that point, or Karen is just stupid, so when another call comes in, she ignores it because she doesn't want to dial the Joke-A-Day number again. How hard is it to do? Did they not have letters on the keypads of phones at that point so you could translate letters into numbers?
But it's worth it, because the joke is HILARIOUS? "Why are twin witches so confusing? Because you can't tell which witch is which!" BRB, holding my sides. Karen was laughing hard when she told the joke though, so I guess it must be really funny. They call Ricky to tell him the joke, and she doesn't mention that they got married on the playground one day and he's her husband, BUT NOT REALLY LOL.
Nannie comes in after that, and she isn't happy because she was on the other end of the ignored call. Karen says that she was in the middle of an important call again. Why do they believe her? How many important calls does someone make in a day from their house? Especially at seven. Nannie tells them to GTFO and let others use the phone.
Next chapter: BIG TROUBLE!!!11
Watson and Kristy are the only ones home, and they're busy doing other stuff, because neither of them wants to spend time with Karen, clearly. So, what do you think she does? Watch TV? Do any schoolwork she might have left over? Go outside and play or something? Bug Watson and Kristy? Or get on the phone again? Tick tock tick tock!
Of course she gets on the phone and calls her usual numbers. Hannie and Nancy aren't home to hear their horoscopes, though, so she decides to call Natalie "because I knew she would be home this afternoon." Jab at how lame and boring Natalie is? You decide. Another radio contest comes on, because I always have the radio on when I'm talking on the phone. It isn't distracting at all. She isn't the right caller, though, so she calls Natalie to tell her the joke. Turns out Natalie is too much of a dumbass to get the joke and Karen has to explain it to her (What time is it when five bears are chasing you? Five after one!).
Stacey calls and wants to talk to Kristy, but, again, Ms. Lazyass doesn't want to go upstairs because Natalie is on the other line and she would just have to go back to her sad little life if Karen didn't get back to her. The message is about (what else?) babysitting, and Karen tells Stacey that she's writing it down when she isn't. What a little liar. Anyway, Stacey can't make it to a sitting job that she and Kristy were fighting over or something, and Kristy needs to go.
Dumbass Natalie finally gets the joke and thinks it's a RIOT. She says she'll call more people, and Karen calls Ricky and Bobby, who are apparently the only boys in her class. Nannie comes in and busts out the bitchface on Karen, showing us where Kristy got her fierce bitchface, but Karen has already made most of the calls she wanted to make, so it's all good.
Then she helps make dinner and blah blah blah, then the Arnolds call wondering where the hell Kristy is, who isn't home because she's at another job at the Korman's. It was a last-minute thing, I guess, but I'm just wondering how they even got through to tell her about it because of the phone being so tied up. Karen remembers that she didn't tell Kristy the message, and realizes that she's in "Big Trouble."
Next chapter, and Elizabeth and Watson are pissed at her. Kristy comes home and is srsly pissed, of course. She calls the Arnolds and they're pissed, too, and they're VERY DISAPPOINTED IN HER AND THE BABYSITTER'S CLUB OMFG. Then everyone comes to bitch at her because she didn't tell them they got calls. In the end, DM, Andrew, and Emily are the only ones in the family not mad at her, though she didn't tell DM that he had a call. Maybe he just doesn't care, I don't know.
Then Elizabeth and Watson limit her phone calls to two a day, but of course, being the sneaky brat she is, she finds a way around this, but that's next chapter. Time for me to sleep, yay!
I feel like I really suck at this right now, but I'm just starting and will hopefully get better. Are there any other LS books that want to be snarked? Because I have all of them except the Easter Parade one.
Last time, Karen is on the phone too damn much, calls 900 numbers every day, more than once, even, and will cut a bitch if they get near the phone while she's on it.
Watch out, here comes some FORESHADOWING. For some reason, I feel like that should be subtle, but this isn't. At all. Hannie and Nancy come over to make more phone calls. Really.
"'You will be the center of attention this month. Use your time wisely and well.'"
HMM. I wonder if that's good or bad? At this point, I really can't tell! I mean, everyone's getting pretty bitchy about her hogging the phone already, could it be about that? Hannie and Nancy's are vague and preposterous at the same time, even though Karen's was spot on, for some reason. Huh.
After calling the Horoscope Hotline, they decide to call the Joke-A-Day one, but Bobby calls. I don't know about y'all, but if a boy called my house when in second grade, I would have freaked out. But I was shy and at a new school, so what do I know. Anyway, as a group, the Three Musketeers were stumped, because they're an entity. After the joke, they call Addie, the girl in the wheelchair who always has stickers and is really smart and articulate because you can't just be normal in Stoneybrook, you have to be SPESHUL. Another call comes in, and it's actually important, but Nannie wasn't home and there wasn't a notepad to take a message on, and being a total idiot lazyass, Karen doesn't ask the person to wait so she can find one. She just decides that she'll remember to tell Nannie later, and that's that.
Illustration! Hannie is INCREDIBLY excited about the fact that Karen is on the phone. She's doing a :D face. Nancy is less enthused about the whole thing, and Karen is sitting down, still talking on the phone. She and Nancy appear to have no legs. They just . . . taper off into oblivion. Whatever.
Hannie and Nancy talk to Addie after Karen is done, because they totally didn't just see each other at school an hour earlier. A classmate of David Michael's calls about homework, but he isn't home so Karen tells him that she'll have DM call him back later, even though she'll forget, of course. Kristy comes in and wants to use the phone, but Karen sounds IMPORTANT when she says she needs to make another one, so Kristy just says her call can wait. Because seven-year-olds make important calls all the time. I was in communication with the governor at that point in my life, and everyone in Stoneybrook knows everyone else, so she could actually be calling the mayor or something.
Either the redial button wasn't invented at that point, or Karen is just stupid, so when another call comes in, she ignores it because she doesn't want to dial the Joke-A-Day number again. How hard is it to do? Did they not have letters on the keypads of phones at that point so you could translate letters into numbers?
But it's worth it, because the joke is HILARIOUS? "Why are twin witches so confusing? Because you can't tell which witch is which!" BRB, holding my sides. Karen was laughing hard when she told the joke though, so I guess it must be really funny. They call Ricky to tell him the joke, and she doesn't mention that they got married on the playground one day and he's her husband, BUT NOT REALLY LOL.
Nannie comes in after that, and she isn't happy because she was on the other end of the ignored call. Karen says that she was in the middle of an important call again. Why do they believe her? How many important calls does someone make in a day from their house? Especially at seven. Nannie tells them to GTFO and let others use the phone.
Next chapter: BIG TROUBLE!!!11
Watson and Kristy are the only ones home, and they're busy doing other stuff, because neither of them wants to spend time with Karen, clearly. So, what do you think she does? Watch TV? Do any schoolwork she might have left over? Go outside and play or something? Bug Watson and Kristy? Or get on the phone again? Tick tock tick tock!
Of course she gets on the phone and calls her usual numbers. Hannie and Nancy aren't home to hear their horoscopes, though, so she decides to call Natalie "because I knew she would be home this afternoon." Jab at how lame and boring Natalie is? You decide. Another radio contest comes on, because I always have the radio on when I'm talking on the phone. It isn't distracting at all. She isn't the right caller, though, so she calls Natalie to tell her the joke. Turns out Natalie is too much of a dumbass to get the joke and Karen has to explain it to her (What time is it when five bears are chasing you? Five after one!).
Stacey calls and wants to talk to Kristy, but, again, Ms. Lazyass doesn't want to go upstairs because Natalie is on the other line and she would just have to go back to her sad little life if Karen didn't get back to her. The message is about (what else?) babysitting, and Karen tells Stacey that she's writing it down when she isn't. What a little liar. Anyway, Stacey can't make it to a sitting job that she and Kristy were fighting over or something, and Kristy needs to go.
Dumbass Natalie finally gets the joke and thinks it's a RIOT. She says she'll call more people, and Karen calls Ricky and Bobby, who are apparently the only boys in her class. Nannie comes in and busts out the bitchface on Karen, showing us where Kristy got her fierce bitchface, but Karen has already made most of the calls she wanted to make, so it's all good.
Then she helps make dinner and blah blah blah, then the Arnolds call wondering where the hell Kristy is, who isn't home because she's at another job at the Korman's. It was a last-minute thing, I guess, but I'm just wondering how they even got through to tell her about it because of the phone being so tied up. Karen remembers that she didn't tell Kristy the message, and realizes that she's in "Big Trouble."
Next chapter, and Elizabeth and Watson are pissed at her. Kristy comes home and is srsly pissed, of course. She calls the Arnolds and they're pissed, too, and they're VERY DISAPPOINTED IN HER AND THE BABYSITTER'S CLUB OMFG. Then everyone comes to bitch at her because she didn't tell them they got calls. In the end, DM, Andrew, and Emily are the only ones in the family not mad at her, though she didn't tell DM that he had a call. Maybe he just doesn't care, I don't know.
Then Elizabeth and Watson limit her phone calls to two a day, but of course, being the sneaky brat she is, she finds a way around this, but that's next chapter. Time for me to sleep, yay!
I feel like I really suck at this right now, but I'm just starting and will hopefully get better. Are there any other LS books that want to be snarked? Because I have all of them except the Easter Parade one.