Mallory and the Mystery Diary #29 Chapters 10-12
So, we pick up with Mallory having read the diary, discovering that Sophie's father was accused of theft by her grandfather, Sophie vows to haunt everyone's dreams until the mystery is solved and Buddy STILL sucks at reading.
Chapter 10
Ann finally remembers that there is another plot to this book and we get treated to an “I heart tutoring Buddy” session. There was a tutoring session in between the first and this one but that one didn’t go any better than the first so we are spared the deets. Mal, is perky as usual when she shows up. This would serve to be truly annoying if I were Buddy. Mal has the completely brilliant idea to have Buddy read comic books to make reading more fun for him. She hopes this will lead him to reading “mysteries and animal stories” when he gets more into reading. Can anyone sense Ann really trying to cement both Mal’s nerdiness and her character trait of loving horse stories? Also, the whole mystery book thing is a nice tie in to the other plot in this book! Keep it up Ann, you’ll be a writer someday! Buddy is properly excited about reading comics and can’t believe his good fortune. Mal discovers that Buddy was right-he can read words “together” much more easily than single words on flashcards. It’s called context clues genius! So after reading comic books, they move on to drawing their own comics. Mal, of course, draws a comic about a squirrel, a mouse and a crow that live in the woods together and have adventures. My guess is Mal is the mouse (because she is shy, quiet has big ears and big front teeth), Kristy is the squirrel (because she hordes her great ideas and parcels them out to the BSC every book or so) and Jessi is the crow (solely because I am convinced Jessi will one day figure out Mal is dragging her down and swoop in for the kill). Buddy draws some lame comic about three kids who take a rocket ship to outer space and then have to get home. Mal wants them to share their stories and Buddy is all, “What if it sucks?” I am sure Buddy just doesn’t want to have to read Mal’s lame comic and pretend he likes it. So they read each other’s comics and Buddy has a bunch of misspelled words. Mal promises him a minute of free time for each one he can find and fix on his own. He finds nine (he made 17 spelling mistakes) and Mal gives him an extra minute for working so hard. SO then they read half of another comic story and make-up the ending. Buddy is so excited that he uses his ten free time minutes to start his reading homework. Mal is ecstatic that Buddy loves reading and goes home patting herself on the back and muttering, “You ain’t the only one with great ideas Kristy! Take that o mighty lord and leader!”
Chapter 11
Mal writes in her journal about how the club has made very little progress on solving the mystery of Sophie and her effed up family. I bet if Jerry Springer or Dr. Phil was around in 1894, they would have had Sophie’s family on the show, attributed all their problems to a deep-seated psychological issue for attention and made them duke it out on stage and figured out what happened to the painting amongst much wailing, baby-mommaing, and gnashing of teeth. So since, as Mal puts it quite snidely, “We weren’t having any luck solving the mystery Kristy’s way, I decided my friends and I should hold a séance…” I completely understand your frustration. After all you guys have been trying to solve a hundred-year old mystery for about 5 minutes and Scooby-Doo and company always manage to solve mysteries in a half-hour, including commercials!!!
She brings this up at the next BSC meeting where her suggestion is met with incredulous remarks. Mal decides they are simply afraid to hold a séance and are covering it up by acting appalled. You know what I think? I think your friends think you are STOOPID for coming up with this idea and are using not so subtle ways to tell you this!!!! Jessi has no idea what a séance is and asks for clarification. Ballet is a real time hogger and her parents actually want to spend time with her, hence the unfamiliarity with all things supernatural. Mallory is hated by all and her parents don’t care what she does, as long as it keeps her out of their bedroom. She is probably in the middle of investigating if her own house has a ghost because of all the moaning she hears at night J
Kristy attempts to explain a séance to Jessi, “It’s when a person wearing a turban on her head goes into a trance and the voice of George Washington comes out of her mouth. Then she collapses on the table from the effort of it all.” Why would someone want to channel George Washington? What questions could someone possibly have for him? “Um, George, why all the fighting with the Brits? Couldn’t you have found an easier way to gain freedom for our country?” This explanation is Ann’s lame attempt at patriotism. Mal shoots Kristy “a look” and explains what a séance really is. An attempt to contact people who have died who may or may not have hated you…just kidding. Jessi is enlightened and we move ahead with the planning. It is decided they will hold the séance at Stacey’s house so they can contact Sophie or Jared to figure out what happened to the painting. I can’t even comment on the lameness right now, it is too overwhelming. The rest of the club chimes in on how this might be fun. Dawn, of course, lover of all ghosties and ghoulies is on board. MA is being a weenie and shivering about it all but she agrees and Kristy and Stacey are trying not to laugh at the dorkiness of the rest of them. I am surprised super sophisticated Stacey agrees to be in the same vicinity as these dorks but any excuse to party, right Stace? Watch out for those mixed drinks, they’ll wreak havoc on your diabetes…
MA confirms that all of them are free the next day and Kristy whines for awhile but agrees to come ONLY if she is the channeler. Shocker, right? Kristy wanting to be in charge and the center of attention? Mal is a bit put off by this because, by rights, she thinks she should be the channeler because it was her idea. She admits that “this is a problem with having 13 year old friends because you have to give in to them pretty often…” *shakes head* ok my mind is out of the gutter now. All the BSC arrive at Stacey’s and have a boring discussion about where to hold the séance. The attic is ruled out because there is not enough room up there for a table and 7 girls. The doorbell rings and on the doorstep is…A GYPSY!!! OMG!!! Who knew there were other ethnicities in Stoneybrook besides white people and the token black family. Everyone is properly aghast until, phew, they realize it is just Kristy with old clothes on, bad makeup and lots of costume jewelry. Karen, of course, had her fingers in this train wreck. I see this as the start of Kristy trying to be more girly and will end up like Carrie on prom night, complete with the crazy apeshit shenanigans. Mallory thinks she looks “amazing.” Of course you do Mal. This again is why you don’t and never will have a bf. So Madame Kristin (as she insists on being called-I figured Kristy would never want ANYTHING as girly as Madame or Kristin for that matter associated with her being…) says they should get started but can they eat first? Stacey checks the clock, sees it is before midnight and lets her know it is safe to feed Mal…jk. Mal yells at Kristy for not taking this seriously and the girls get down to biz. The girls join hands and concentrate on Sophie (ten bucks says MA is thinking, “Screw all of ya’s-I;m getting a hold of my mom!!) and Kristy Madame Kristin starts reassuring Sophie it is safe for her to talk to them. “Suddenly Kristy’s voice changed. It rose and became all wavery.” Don’t worry-Kristy’s finally hit puberty!! Sophie begins to speak and we are all fooled until Sophie tells the girls that the painting was never really missing, Grandfather lost his glasses one day and couldn’t see it so he thought it disappeared. Dumbass Mal buys it for a minute before Kristy bursts out laughing and they eat. End of chapter!!!!!!!
Chapter 12
It starts with Stacey going on and on and on about how totes wonderful Charlotte is. Personally, I always thought Char was kinda wimpy and didn’t exactly explode off the page with personality but to each his own I guess. Stacey’s crush on Char is developing nicely and we hear how book smart and thoughtful smart Char is (did you know she skipped a grade?). SO we get more backstory about how Stacey had to leave her fave charges behind in NY and so she was glad Char was still in Stoneybrook when Stace moved back. Where would Char go that would require her to move out when she is only 9? Is she the next Doogie Howser? Is Dr. J secretly grooming her to attend medical school in the next year or so? And PS just so you know Stacey did a lot to pull Char out of her shell…How you ask? Idk since Ann didn’t think that was important enough to include. Ahhhh vague generalizations that serve no purpose, how I love thee.
As she is leaving, Dr. J makes the dumbest comment-she tells Stacey to “just go ahead and have fun.” WTF???? Like Stacey would have it any other way!! Or is that a secret code between the two of them that Stace can stick Char in front of the boob tube, invite a boy over, suck face and suck down booze…
Stacey thinks Char will be interested in hearing about the lameass mystery they are “trying” to solve. Since she has been watching crime court, Char makes the observation that there is “no such thing as a perfect crime and every mystery can be solved.” She also observes that the BSC doesn’t know the whole story yet. Stacey doesn’t understand what Char is trying to say so to illustrate her point, Char brings a picture book over and reads it to Stacey. Stacey is still befuddled as to what this has to do with the price of tea in China so Char then shows her the pictures. Apparently this is a Christmas story but you wouldn’t know from just reading it, you have to look at the pics too. Stacey scratches her noodle over what this means in relation to their mystery (no wonder they haven’t solved it, not exactly thinking hard are they?) and Char explains that “sometimes things aren’t always what they seem to be. Sometimes you have to look past what is right in front of your nose.” The rest of the chapter is describing that Stacey is thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking this over and the chapter ends without us really knowing if she ever figured out how it applies to their mystery. Should of just asked Char to solve it if you ask me…probably be a lot less painful!
Chapter 10
Ann finally remembers that there is another plot to this book and we get treated to an “I heart tutoring Buddy” session. There was a tutoring session in between the first and this one but that one didn’t go any better than the first so we are spared the deets. Mal, is perky as usual when she shows up. This would serve to be truly annoying if I were Buddy. Mal has the completely brilliant idea to have Buddy read comic books to make reading more fun for him. She hopes this will lead him to reading “mysteries and animal stories” when he gets more into reading. Can anyone sense Ann really trying to cement both Mal’s nerdiness and her character trait of loving horse stories? Also, the whole mystery book thing is a nice tie in to the other plot in this book! Keep it up Ann, you’ll be a writer someday! Buddy is properly excited about reading comics and can’t believe his good fortune. Mal discovers that Buddy was right-he can read words “together” much more easily than single words on flashcards. It’s called context clues genius! So after reading comic books, they move on to drawing their own comics. Mal, of course, draws a comic about a squirrel, a mouse and a crow that live in the woods together and have adventures. My guess is Mal is the mouse (because she is shy, quiet has big ears and big front teeth), Kristy is the squirrel (because she hordes her great ideas and parcels them out to the BSC every book or so) and Jessi is the crow (solely because I am convinced Jessi will one day figure out Mal is dragging her down and swoop in for the kill). Buddy draws some lame comic about three kids who take a rocket ship to outer space and then have to get home. Mal wants them to share their stories and Buddy is all, “What if it sucks?” I am sure Buddy just doesn’t want to have to read Mal’s lame comic and pretend he likes it. So they read each other’s comics and Buddy has a bunch of misspelled words. Mal promises him a minute of free time for each one he can find and fix on his own. He finds nine (he made 17 spelling mistakes) and Mal gives him an extra minute for working so hard. SO then they read half of another comic story and make-up the ending. Buddy is so excited that he uses his ten free time minutes to start his reading homework. Mal is ecstatic that Buddy loves reading and goes home patting herself on the back and muttering, “You ain’t the only one with great ideas Kristy! Take that o mighty lord and leader!”
Chapter 11
Mal writes in her journal about how the club has made very little progress on solving the mystery of Sophie and her effed up family. I bet if Jerry Springer or Dr. Phil was around in 1894, they would have had Sophie’s family on the show, attributed all their problems to a deep-seated psychological issue for attention and made them duke it out on stage and figured out what happened to the painting amongst much wailing, baby-mommaing, and gnashing of teeth. So since, as Mal puts it quite snidely, “We weren’t having any luck solving the mystery Kristy’s way, I decided my friends and I should hold a séance…” I completely understand your frustration. After all you guys have been trying to solve a hundred-year old mystery for about 5 minutes and Scooby-Doo and company always manage to solve mysteries in a half-hour, including commercials!!!
She brings this up at the next BSC meeting where her suggestion is met with incredulous remarks. Mal decides they are simply afraid to hold a séance and are covering it up by acting appalled. You know what I think? I think your friends think you are STOOPID for coming up with this idea and are using not so subtle ways to tell you this!!!! Jessi has no idea what a séance is and asks for clarification. Ballet is a real time hogger and her parents actually want to spend time with her, hence the unfamiliarity with all things supernatural. Mallory is hated by all and her parents don’t care what she does, as long as it keeps her out of their bedroom. She is probably in the middle of investigating if her own house has a ghost because of all the moaning she hears at night J
Kristy attempts to explain a séance to Jessi, “It’s when a person wearing a turban on her head goes into a trance and the voice of George Washington comes out of her mouth. Then she collapses on the table from the effort of it all.” Why would someone want to channel George Washington? What questions could someone possibly have for him? “Um, George, why all the fighting with the Brits? Couldn’t you have found an easier way to gain freedom for our country?” This explanation is Ann’s lame attempt at patriotism. Mal shoots Kristy “a look” and explains what a séance really is. An attempt to contact people who have died who may or may not have hated you…just kidding. Jessi is enlightened and we move ahead with the planning. It is decided they will hold the séance at Stacey’s house so they can contact Sophie or Jared to figure out what happened to the painting. I can’t even comment on the lameness right now, it is too overwhelming. The rest of the club chimes in on how this might be fun. Dawn, of course, lover of all ghosties and ghoulies is on board. MA is being a weenie and shivering about it all but she agrees and Kristy and Stacey are trying not to laugh at the dorkiness of the rest of them. I am surprised super sophisticated Stacey agrees to be in the same vicinity as these dorks but any excuse to party, right Stace? Watch out for those mixed drinks, they’ll wreak havoc on your diabetes…
MA confirms that all of them are free the next day and Kristy whines for awhile but agrees to come ONLY if she is the channeler. Shocker, right? Kristy wanting to be in charge and the center of attention? Mal is a bit put off by this because, by rights, she thinks she should be the channeler because it was her idea. She admits that “this is a problem with having 13 year old friends because you have to give in to them pretty often…” *shakes head* ok my mind is out of the gutter now. All the BSC arrive at Stacey’s and have a boring discussion about where to hold the séance. The attic is ruled out because there is not enough room up there for a table and 7 girls. The doorbell rings and on the doorstep is…A GYPSY!!! OMG!!! Who knew there were other ethnicities in Stoneybrook besides white people and the token black family. Everyone is properly aghast until, phew, they realize it is just Kristy with old clothes on, bad makeup and lots of costume jewelry. Karen, of course, had her fingers in this train wreck. I see this as the start of Kristy trying to be more girly and will end up like Carrie on prom night, complete with the crazy apeshit shenanigans. Mallory thinks she looks “amazing.” Of course you do Mal. This again is why you don’t and never will have a bf. So Madame Kristin (as she insists on being called-I figured Kristy would never want ANYTHING as girly as Madame or Kristin for that matter associated with her being…) says they should get started but can they eat first? Stacey checks the clock, sees it is before midnight and lets her know it is safe to feed Mal…jk. Mal yells at Kristy for not taking this seriously and the girls get down to biz. The girls join hands and concentrate on Sophie (ten bucks says MA is thinking, “Screw all of ya’s-I;m getting a hold of my mom!!) and Kristy Madame Kristin starts reassuring Sophie it is safe for her to talk to them. “Suddenly Kristy’s voice changed. It rose and became all wavery.” Don’t worry-Kristy’s finally hit puberty!! Sophie begins to speak and we are all fooled until Sophie tells the girls that the painting was never really missing, Grandfather lost his glasses one day and couldn’t see it so he thought it disappeared. Dumbass Mal buys it for a minute before Kristy bursts out laughing and they eat. End of chapter!!!!!!!
Chapter 12
It starts with Stacey going on and on and on about how totes wonderful Charlotte is. Personally, I always thought Char was kinda wimpy and didn’t exactly explode off the page with personality but to each his own I guess. Stacey’s crush on Char is developing nicely and we hear how book smart and thoughtful smart Char is (did you know she skipped a grade?). SO we get more backstory about how Stacey had to leave her fave charges behind in NY and so she was glad Char was still in Stoneybrook when Stace moved back. Where would Char go that would require her to move out when she is only 9? Is she the next Doogie Howser? Is Dr. J secretly grooming her to attend medical school in the next year or so? And PS just so you know Stacey did a lot to pull Char out of her shell…How you ask? Idk since Ann didn’t think that was important enough to include. Ahhhh vague generalizations that serve no purpose, how I love thee.
As she is leaving, Dr. J makes the dumbest comment-she tells Stacey to “just go ahead and have fun.” WTF???? Like Stacey would have it any other way!! Or is that a secret code between the two of them that Stace can stick Char in front of the boob tube, invite a boy over, suck face and suck down booze…
Stacey thinks Char will be interested in hearing about the lameass mystery they are “trying” to solve. Since she has been watching crime court, Char makes the observation that there is “no such thing as a perfect crime and every mystery can be solved.” She also observes that the BSC doesn’t know the whole story yet. Stacey doesn’t understand what Char is trying to say so to illustrate her point, Char brings a picture book over and reads it to Stacey. Stacey is still befuddled as to what this has to do with the price of tea in China so Char then shows her the pictures. Apparently this is a Christmas story but you wouldn’t know from just reading it, you have to look at the pics too. Stacey scratches her noodle over what this means in relation to their mystery (no wonder they haven’t solved it, not exactly thinking hard are they?) and Char explains that “sometimes things aren’t always what they seem to be. Sometimes you have to look past what is right in front of your nose.” The rest of the chapter is describing that Stacey is thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking this over and the chapter ends without us really knowing if she ever figured out how it applies to their mystery. Should of just asked Char to solve it if you ask me…probably be a lot less painful!