There are a few minor grammatical errors, but it is pretty good. Questions: I don't get what is so cute or laughable about the name Abby Normal. Wouldn't she get made fun of for her last name no matter what her first name was? I am not sure I understand the title. Does this story take place in the past, or does the time period progress? How many fifth graders have even heard of Frank Zappa? And yes, her parents are hippies, but the title suggests that disliking him is unusual. I think it would be unusual for anyone her age to be fond of him.
These criticisms are all minor, as you can tell, and I am very excited to see how this story will progress! I love the descriptive writing, it makes me want to sip a mug of spiced cider as I read! Today I was in the shower and an ending for my novel suddenly came to me. It kind of inspired me to take it up again. Perhaps you can motivate me to write?
Yeah. I am getting really bad w/ grammar. :) I need to practice writing correctly.
Well she would get made fun of regardless. That's sort of the thing. But she takes it personally. I don't have any more of the story. This is more like the childhood background of a character. I should guess she was young in the past. As for the title... well, she isn't still in 5th grade. I think it's just a weird random title. I threw it in in the last minute. I ought to change it. But I would like to still have a long slightly strange non-direct descriptive title. I bet you can think of some!
Inspiration is weird. A lot of the things are just stuff I thought of walking to the bus stop or down town. I need to write them down.
I thought of another story about an adult... kind of like what I used to do when I tried to make coming of age stories but grown up. Maybe this could be her background? I don't know. Maybe that's all there is?
Oh, so do they just make fun of her last name then? I don't understand why her parents thought they were being cute... If you are to continue this as a short story, I think you should keep her as the same age. People change so much as they get older, and changing her age in a short story would almost be like having two different main characters, you know? I think it would be a bit much for a short story. If you are doing an adult story, make it entirely different! I am starting the campaign to keep Abby ten! Or maybe eleven if she has a birthday....
Well, make her in jr high then. I dunno, like I said, too many time changes/too much historical background in short stories is too much. If you want to make that a prologue, you've gotta go for the novel. That's my opinion and I'm stickin to it!
Questions: I don't get what is so cute or laughable about the name Abby Normal. Wouldn't she get made fun of for her last name no matter what her first name was?
I am not sure I understand the title. Does this story take place in the past, or does the time period progress? How many fifth graders have even heard of Frank Zappa? And yes, her parents are hippies, but the title suggests that disliking him is unusual. I think it would be unusual for anyone her age to be fond of him.
These criticisms are all minor, as you can tell, and I am very excited to see how this story will progress! I love the descriptive writing, it makes me want to sip a mug of spiced cider as I read! Today I was in the shower and an ending for my novel suddenly came to me. It kind of inspired me to take it up again. Perhaps you can motivate me to write?
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Well she would get made fun of regardless. That's sort of the thing. But she takes it personally.
I don't have any more of the story. This is more like the childhood background of a character. I should guess she was young in the past. As for the title... well, she isn't still in 5th grade. I think it's just a weird random title. I threw it in in the last minute. I ought to change it. But I would like to still have a long slightly strange non-direct descriptive title. I bet you can think of some!
Inspiration is weird. A lot of the things are just stuff I thought of walking to the bus stop or down town. I need to write them down.
I thought of another story about an adult... kind of like what I used to do when I tried to make coming of age stories but grown up. Maybe this could be her background?
I don't know.
Maybe that's all there is?
Reply
If you are to continue this as a short story, I think you should keep her as the same age. People change so much as they get older, and changing her age in a short story would almost be like having two different main characters, you know? I think it would be a bit much for a short story. If you are doing an adult story, make it entirely different! I am starting the campaign to keep Abby ten! Or maybe eleven if she has a birthday....
Reply
What I meant was this could be a.. prologue(?) I don't know.
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