MISSION: no sex
that's right. no more sex for me. i'm shooting for a month, but possibly could go on longer. i've been debating this for a while, and i think it might actually do me some good. now, i'm not cutting out everything, just actual sex. and possibly anything involving clothes being removed. i haven't quite decided yet. it'll depend on the situation, i suppose. i think i might do that tho.
see, here's the thing. sex has become some-what boring. it's lost it's thrill, and thats never good. i need to re-evaluate exactly why i want to do it. i tend to get to involved with people too quickly, and i've stopped seeing sex as what it should be, which is something special. i'm not getting all sanctimonious on your asses people, but i really should put more meaning behind sex than i do. the funny thing is that i do put meaning behind it, but i don't always get that back from the people i sleep with. and then i get hurt. so either way, this will make lacey a happier person. aside from that, it'll be a good exercise in willpower, and will make me a stronger person.
in other news, that thing i was hoping would happen did. which in part spawned the above dicision, but i'm not getting into details.
::sighs:: i'm quite content. i had nothing to worry about, which is good.everything turned out exactly as i wanted it too, and i'm quite happy. won't be seeing alec again for another week or so, but i'm used to that sort of thing. i only see rich every few weeks. seeing him two weeks in a row is like a fucking act of god, that guy is so busy.
but yeah. alec came over last night, crashed at my place. we watched mirrormask and the untouchables, and i got disgustingly drunk. it was beautiful. and everything just went to perfectly, and i felt beautiful. that's how know it was a good night.
it's so funny tho, because here i am swearing off sex while also saying that i'm just going to play, when it comes to relationships. i'm not anybodies and no one is mine. i go with the flow, and do what and who (well not anymore!) i want.
another reason to do what i'm doing. i miss the simple joy of just making out with a guy. it always has to lead to something more, and that sucks!! just making out with people is so much more fun. the greatest joy ever, i think, is just enjoying a kiss. and i don't get to do just that enough. i wanna try and regain that.
thats all for now. i'm freakishly bored. someone should call me or some over.
215-467-1455, but only for tonight, cuz i'm babysitting.
see, here's the thing. sex has become some-what boring. it's lost it's thrill, and thats never good. i need to re-evaluate exactly why i want to do it. i tend to get to involved with people too quickly, and i've stopped seeing sex as what it should be, which is something special. i'm not getting all sanctimonious on your asses people, but i really should put more meaning behind sex than i do. the funny thing is that i do put meaning behind it, but i don't always get that back from the people i sleep with. and then i get hurt. so either way, this will make lacey a happier person. aside from that, it'll be a good exercise in willpower, and will make me a stronger person.
in other news, that thing i was hoping would happen did. which in part spawned the above dicision, but i'm not getting into details.
::sighs:: i'm quite content. i had nothing to worry about, which is good.everything turned out exactly as i wanted it too, and i'm quite happy. won't be seeing alec again for another week or so, but i'm used to that sort of thing. i only see rich every few weeks. seeing him two weeks in a row is like a fucking act of god, that guy is so busy.
but yeah. alec came over last night, crashed at my place. we watched mirrormask and the untouchables, and i got disgustingly drunk. it was beautiful. and everything just went to perfectly, and i felt beautiful. that's how know it was a good night.
it's so funny tho, because here i am swearing off sex while also saying that i'm just going to play, when it comes to relationships. i'm not anybodies and no one is mine. i go with the flow, and do what and who (well not anymore!) i want.
another reason to do what i'm doing. i miss the simple joy of just making out with a guy. it always has to lead to something more, and that sucks!! just making out with people is so much more fun. the greatest joy ever, i think, is just enjoying a kiss. and i don't get to do just that enough. i wanna try and regain that.
thats all for now. i'm freakishly bored. someone should call me or some over.
215-467-1455, but only for tonight, cuz i'm babysitting.