lack of updatedness
sorry about the lack of updatedness, ummm 2 days until xmas! so it's the eve of xmas eve....as Vik says...Vik slept over the past two days...we had a pow wow last night, for 4 hours ...or pretty damn close to 4 hours...adn i feel better, i'm starting to admit shit to myself that i didnt want to admit before, that i was too stubborn to admit, the JoHari window thing is right...there are things other people see that you dont...you're blind to it..and i was very blinded to this....but i seriously think i'm scaring Kevin right now....cuz i'm crazy and need a new life, need a new someone in my life, but i feel like they'll never come and i'm drowing in my own sorrow and hurting from my own tears, shoving them down my throat and drowing myself! if only i would die for real, anything to get rid of this pain...anything right now....just to get away, i need a new life..i hate me and i dont want to be me anymore....