When I look back on these days I'll look and see your face.... You were right there for me
I sort of feel like my past is haunting me, in a way. I don't think I will ever totally be over Justin, I will always have this fondness for him. It's one of those bittersweet things, where talking is so nice and so comfortable, but at the same time it's awkward and painful. 'I'll keep a part of you with me...' I'm done hating him. I think sometimes I put people up on pedestals, or down in the ditch when they needn't be. I see some people as untouchable. In some ways I always felt that way about Justin, like I was always below him (and yes I was literally ;) ) What are you supposed to say to someone that tells you they miss you, when you really don't miss them. But then I do miss him... in a way... mostly personality wise. Smile Justin, keep smiling.
So Tyler, Jay, Vanessa, and I MIGHT take a road trip down to Panama City Beach, FL. We already found a cheap hotel online that has two attached bedrooms (sorta) with a kitchen. It'll be fun... if I can go. I'm not sure how my parents are going to take the whole going to another state on the other side of the country with my boyfriend. I do know that my dad loves Tyler tho, so that'll help the situation.
Vanessa and I are going to live together in Landon next year. It's in the older part of campus and they're the really old, pretty dorms. I love it. It'll be fun.
Sorry... this is kinda long, I haven't written in a long time.
Then I have Tyler, and I'm totally happy and comfortable, and still giddy about being with him and being around him. Sometimes I get mad because he won't stop fidgeting, or he can't be serious for too long, but then I sit back and I look at his goofy smile, and I know that that's who he is. I wouldn't change him a bit, and I always have fun with him. He's so great for me. Keeps me happy when I'd prefer to be sad or pouting. God I love him so much. It scares me to think that so many couples knew within their first few dates that they were going to get married. That they knew right away that this was the person for them. I have looked at him and thought 'God our children are going to be great' or how happy I am to wake up in the morning with his beautiful peaceful face next to mine, and his warm body cuddled up to mine. I won't say it tho Al, just for your sake.
I'm coming home this weekend. I hope to see you all. My birthday is on monday.... actually something bad or unhappy happens on my birthday, so I'm not really too excited. My birthday is just another day of the year to everyone else, no big deal to them, so why should it be for me?
I love you all. See you soon (except you Lauren... yes you still suck!)
Emily
So Tyler, Jay, Vanessa, and I MIGHT take a road trip down to Panama City Beach, FL. We already found a cheap hotel online that has two attached bedrooms (sorta) with a kitchen. It'll be fun... if I can go. I'm not sure how my parents are going to take the whole going to another state on the other side of the country with my boyfriend. I do know that my dad loves Tyler tho, so that'll help the situation.
Vanessa and I are going to live together in Landon next year. It's in the older part of campus and they're the really old, pretty dorms. I love it. It'll be fun.
Sorry... this is kinda long, I haven't written in a long time.
Then I have Tyler, and I'm totally happy and comfortable, and still giddy about being with him and being around him. Sometimes I get mad because he won't stop fidgeting, or he can't be serious for too long, but then I sit back and I look at his goofy smile, and I know that that's who he is. I wouldn't change him a bit, and I always have fun with him. He's so great for me. Keeps me happy when I'd prefer to be sad or pouting. God I love him so much. It scares me to think that so many couples knew within their first few dates that they were going to get married. That they knew right away that this was the person for them. I have looked at him and thought 'God our children are going to be great' or how happy I am to wake up in the morning with his beautiful peaceful face next to mine, and his warm body cuddled up to mine. I won't say it tho Al, just for your sake.
I'm coming home this weekend. I hope to see you all. My birthday is on monday.... actually something bad or unhappy happens on my birthday, so I'm not really too excited. My birthday is just another day of the year to everyone else, no big deal to them, so why should it be for me?
I love you all. See you soon (except you Lauren... yes you still suck!)
Emily