Random Musings
"You're too independent. I just can't see you dealing with anybody else in a relationship."
That's what a co-worker said to me recently, when discussing dating and such. My overnight crewmembers love to razz me about being married and having kids before long. They seem determined to believe that I'll find somebody before long, and fall into the exact same situation that most folks seem to be in. Married, with kids, not really financially stable, and dependent on someone else for so many aspects of their life. Only one of my co-workers actually seems to get my thoughts on the subject.
Why is independence a bad thing? To some of my co-workers, they assume I'm gay simply because I don't see any advantage in treating relationships/dating as a competitive sport. To others, they seem to be unnerved that I don't show any signs of doing the "normal" thing and find somebody to go be co-dependent with and pop out a couple of kids. So what's so disturbing about being independent? I've told these folks over the years that my ideal future would be me, my own place (apartment or condo more likely than a house), and a few big-ass dogs. No wife, no kids, no live-in girlfriend, most likely not even dating somebody. And apparently, that's a really disturbing image to people around me. My dad still seem to think it's just some kind of phase. My moms seem to have accepted it. My local friends, it seems to be a mixed bag. But overall, people seem to think that I'm just settling or that I still haven't gotten over past relationships. How many times do you have to say something before you are actually believed that it is what you want? When did being a happy and healthy person require two people?
I don't need somebody else for my finances currently. I cook, I clean, and I don't need somebody else for household tasks. So how the hell did I suddenly become the person with the problem?
That's what a co-worker said to me recently, when discussing dating and such. My overnight crewmembers love to razz me about being married and having kids before long. They seem determined to believe that I'll find somebody before long, and fall into the exact same situation that most folks seem to be in. Married, with kids, not really financially stable, and dependent on someone else for so many aspects of their life. Only one of my co-workers actually seems to get my thoughts on the subject.
Why is independence a bad thing? To some of my co-workers, they assume I'm gay simply because I don't see any advantage in treating relationships/dating as a competitive sport. To others, they seem to be unnerved that I don't show any signs of doing the "normal" thing and find somebody to go be co-dependent with and pop out a couple of kids. So what's so disturbing about being independent? I've told these folks over the years that my ideal future would be me, my own place (apartment or condo more likely than a house), and a few big-ass dogs. No wife, no kids, no live-in girlfriend, most likely not even dating somebody. And apparently, that's a really disturbing image to people around me. My dad still seem to think it's just some kind of phase. My moms seem to have accepted it. My local friends, it seems to be a mixed bag. But overall, people seem to think that I'm just settling or that I still haven't gotten over past relationships. How many times do you have to say something before you are actually believed that it is what you want? When did being a happy and healthy person require two people?
I don't need somebody else for my finances currently. I cook, I clean, and I don't need somebody else for household tasks. So how the hell did I suddenly become the person with the problem?