Party Like a Pro
Today I was introduced to something known as the Liberty Amendment.
Amazingly enough, the Liberty Amendment has nothing to do with liberty. It's about chopping up the federal government and taking away almost half of it's funding. I think most people will agree that the federal government is, to use the geek term, "bloatware". I think that most people would agree that the federal government needs to embrace the concept of "elegance"--an appropriate balance of efficiency and efficacy.
This proposed amendment, however, is not the way to do it. It's nothing more than the naive ramblings of a naive party.
Libertarians are one of the touted "third parties" that claims they have the simple and instant solution to all that ails us. The solution, they say, is to eliminate taxes and chop the federal government down to a shadow of its current size. "If it's not specifically spelled out in the Constitution" they say "then the feds don't have the right to do it."
Many of them will wax nostalgic to past times when federal spending levels were smaller and there was no such thing as Social Security or income tax. "If the feds could survive this way under Teddy Roosevelt," they opine "they can do it today."
You want the government to get out of your life? You want to chop its funding? You want the government of 1900?
Okay.
We're pleased that the cutting of our federal spending and cessation of interference with your free market economy will help you to live better, freer, more "liberated" lives. We're so very glad that we could be of service. If you have any other suggestions or comments, you can either mail them to us, or drop them off at the front desk. Since the government isn't providing internet services anymore, our e-mail server no longer exists.
Enjoy your country!
If you need me, I'll be in Canada.
As I understand it, they think that taking care of the members of a society actually makes the society stronger. Radical concept, I know, but I'm willing to give it a try.
Besides.... they have Poutine. What can I say.... it's a guilty pleasure.
Imported from the Buzz
Amazingly enough, the Liberty Amendment has nothing to do with liberty. It's about chopping up the federal government and taking away almost half of it's funding. I think most people will agree that the federal government is, to use the geek term, "bloatware". I think that most people would agree that the federal government needs to embrace the concept of "elegance"--an appropriate balance of efficiency and efficacy.
This proposed amendment, however, is not the way to do it. It's nothing more than the naive ramblings of a naive party.
Libertarians are one of the touted "third parties" that claims they have the simple and instant solution to all that ails us. The solution, they say, is to eliminate taxes and chop the federal government down to a shadow of its current size. "If it's not specifically spelled out in the Constitution" they say "then the feds don't have the right to do it."
Many of them will wax nostalgic to past times when federal spending levels were smaller and there was no such thing as Social Security or income tax. "If the feds could survive this way under Teddy Roosevelt," they opine "they can do it today."
You want the government to get out of your life? You want to chop its funding? You want the government of 1900?
Okay.
- We'll no longer be maintaining your internet, or regulating the rates on your phone service or cable TV (those satellites are lunched by NASA, and you don't want us involved in any business endeavors).
- Oh. AT&T will be calling you sometime in the next month. Since we won't be interfering with business anymore, they'll be taking back control of all of their transmission lines. Those other companies didn't do anything to create the infrastructure, so they really have no place in the free market. AT&T will let you know what your new rates will be.
- We'll no longer be subsidizing your electricity, natural gas, water, and sewer services. You can contract with any vendor of your choice to provide those services.
- Tolls for use of all streets and highways will be assessed starting 30 days after the change of rules. You can purchase upgrades and new roads from whomever you want.
- Immunizations against measles, mumps, chicken pox, and polio will be stopped so as not to interfere with your personal rights (smallpox is already gone, so you don't have to worry about that one).
- We suggest that you spend lots of time with your family now, because you might not be seeing them as much after we no longer interfere with market forces by enforcing the 40-hour work week. Your employer will be deciding what constitutes "overtime", and what, if anything, extra to pay for that.
- You might not want to be getting too friendly with your co-workers. Many of them won't be around for long. Between the capricious firings and the losses due to industrial accidents, the turnover rate will be sure to increase. However, if you want to get really friendly with that hottie down in purchasing, feel free. We won't stop you.
- Your employers will be meeting with your union representatives to discuss the dissolution of your collective bargaining unit. In the event that you choose to strike, we suggest cleaning out your locker first, as the space will be needed by the person hired to take your place.
- You'll want to keep a close eye on your children, since the FBI won't have the funding to chase after kidnappers and child pornographers.
- Might I suggest an Acme safe to hold your life savings? FDIC is one of those "new-fangled" programs that you say you won't be needing.
- We'll be eliminating that "unnecessary handout" of Social Security, so you'll have that extra 6.2% of your income to spend. Oh, your wife called to tell you to clean out the spare room; Since they have no income anymore, Mom and Dad will be moving in with you.
- We understand that you're against "hand outs" to people, and we respect that. By the way, the $50,000 for this year's tuition for your daughter at the state university is due by September 1st.
- We will also, by your request, stop interfering with how insurance companies set their rates. From what I understand, all the big players will be getting together next month to make sure that all their rates are about the same. Don't worry. I'm sure the market pressures will encourage them all to drop their prices. After all, price-fixing wouldn't ever happen in a free market.
- Thanks to your inspired direction, we'll be saving millions of dollars over at the FDA. It's amazing how much money we've been waisting on meat inspectors, health standards and uniform ingredient labeling. I won't even go into how oppressive and wasteful the drug approval process is. But we'll no longer be interfering with those industries. The food and drug industries obviously have your best interests in mind, and removing our interest will allow them to provide you with even safer products.
- The Post Office should remain unaffected.
We're pleased that the cutting of our federal spending and cessation of interference with your free market economy will help you to live better, freer, more "liberated" lives. We're so very glad that we could be of service. If you have any other suggestions or comments, you can either mail them to us, or drop them off at the front desk. Since the government isn't providing internet services anymore, our e-mail server no longer exists.
Enjoy your country!
If you need me, I'll be in Canada.
As I understand it, they think that taking care of the members of a society actually makes the society stronger. Radical concept, I know, but I'm willing to give it a try.
Besides.... they have Poutine. What can I say.... it's a guilty pleasure.
Imported from the Buzz