(no subject)
So basically I'm super depressed and super happy at the same time. Make sense much? Didn't think so.
School is great. I'm taking Anthropology, along with Music Theory, Sightsinging/Dictation, Italian Diction for Singers, Jazz Choir, and private voice lessons. It doesn't get any better than being able to study things that actually interest you, right?? Yeah, it's pretty much great.
I'm feeling very physically active since I walk probably almost 3 miles a day. And the gym is great too. Now if I could just start eating better too.
But on the other hand I'm pretty depressed. I feel like I'm dragging Brandon through the dirt. There really isn't much room for him in my life anymore. He sees it and I see it. College is opening up so many new experiences and I just don't know if I'm ready to settle down with him like he wants. I'm only 18 and he's the only person I've really seriously dated. But I don't think he understands that. I don't want to hurt him, but I know that I'm bound to in some form or another. I'm hurting him just by neglecting his needs. This relationship has become very one-sided, with him being the only one really putting in any effort. And that's not fair. I know what I should probably do, but I just can't. I know that that will just hurt him even more. And I don't want him to hurt. I don't know what to do.
School is great. I'm taking Anthropology, along with Music Theory, Sightsinging/Dictation, Italian Diction for Singers, Jazz Choir, and private voice lessons. It doesn't get any better than being able to study things that actually interest you, right?? Yeah, it's pretty much great.
I'm feeling very physically active since I walk probably almost 3 miles a day. And the gym is great too. Now if I could just start eating better too.
But on the other hand I'm pretty depressed. I feel like I'm dragging Brandon through the dirt. There really isn't much room for him in my life anymore. He sees it and I see it. College is opening up so many new experiences and I just don't know if I'm ready to settle down with him like he wants. I'm only 18 and he's the only person I've really seriously dated. But I don't think he understands that. I don't want to hurt him, but I know that I'm bound to in some form or another. I'm hurting him just by neglecting his needs. This relationship has become very one-sided, with him being the only one really putting in any effort. And that's not fair. I know what I should probably do, but I just can't. I know that that will just hurt him even more. And I don't want him to hurt. I don't know what to do.