(no subject)
Came home today....get my hair done tomorrow....talked to jason on the phone...how easily i get frustrated...i was trying to be patient....its harder than he thinks....he doesnt really get it...its cute how he tries though....i wanted to go with his mom to the airport but i figure they needed their space....i want him to do his thing and if i fit in somewhere great....but i dont want to force him to hang out with me if he has other plans...i definetly dont want to be one of those girls...i think he is taking the whole "we are gonna be together for the rest of our lives outlook" while i on the other hand think we should live each day like its our last and want to spend every second of every minute with him...i worry like i am 80 years old....he is gonna want to see melissa....i wont be present for that reuinion....all his other girls want to see him...i know what they think of me....they dont know me....he feels like there is nothing wrong with it...and there really isnt...i just dont like them....they definetly dont fit into the our friends category.....i just love him so much....it tears me up how he thinks he loves me and misses me more...if he really only knew....i feel like he acts like its not a big deal...it makes me sad....maybe its just me...i just dont understand whats wrong...maybe i have just changed....