Party of Five?
So, you need the back story to this blog. Ever since Kynlee has been born (8 months ago tomorrow), Ambi and Tyson have been growing increasingly jealous, which, according to what I've read, nearly all dogs do as an adjustment to not being the center of attention anymore in the house. So, to be expected. However, the past week or two, Ambi has decided that since we're not giving her the attention, she's just going to take it. How's that? Oh, well, by simply taking huge dumps in the middle of the living room while we sleep. Lovely!
Anyhow, I was talking to Adryan yesterday, and I brought up that I think Ambi definitely needs to start getting some more attention, she suggested taking nightly walks. Not a terrible idea, since lord knows Richie and I could also use the exercise. We've both put on 20 lbs since we met, what is THAT about? I mean, I get it. People start dating, they go out to eat, they cook for each other, blah blah. But damn. I hate when I start new relationships, I have to start wearing my fattest jeans again :p Thankfully, this will be my last relationship to ever start, so now we can work on shedding that excess weight. Or, actually, I can. He still is well within his ideal weight range. Although he did have to buy an entire new set of jeans and pants because he "outgrew" his. Hehe. OK, I digress.
So the point is, we decided to take a family walk last night. I gave Richie the choice of pushing Kynlee in her stroller, or walking the dogs. Unless he really was being a complete selfless sweetheart who wanted to give me the easy route, he is crazy. He chose the dogs. Under normal circumstances, I might let him claim ignorance about their behavior, but he's known them for 6 months now, and he knows that they are INSANELY hyper. And they're not small. In fact, their combined weight probably gives him a run for his money.
Anyway, aside from the occasional pull, tug, twist, or switcheroo that they keep pulling on him, we actually get into a nice walk. Kynlee is loving it, Ambi is not actively trying to commit suicide by pulling herself on the leash so hard that she cuts off all oxygen, Tyson is peeing on fire hydrants. We're having a good time. We walk the neighborhood's park exercise path, we stop and walk on balance beams, we house fantasize. After a good 30 minutes, we decide to head home. We turn the corner onto the street perpendicular to our street. There are some kids in the sidewalk, riding bikes, some people sitting in their driveway enjoying the sun....and a dog, without a collar, in the middle of the street.
Oh, dear.
Within .0008 seconds of Tyson and this dog locking eyes, Tyson has Houdini'ed himself out of his collar and is chasing a stray dog down Hoe Down Way. Yes, the street is called Hoe Down. Richie and I exchange looks, and I see the dread in his face as I grab Ambi's leash from him and yell "Run!!" to him. So, yes folks, awkward, clumsy, least-athletic boy in the world (honey, I love you, but you know it's true), hikes up his jeans and starts running after Tyson. With an audience. And me hunched over my stroller trying not to pee myself, whilst also trying to control Ambi, who has gone crazy because her boyfriend has run off. If I had had a video camera, I would kiss myself right now. Tyson chasing dog, grown man chasing Tyson, girlfriend/baby/dog/neighbors watching man chase Tyson, trying not to let him hear the laughter.
There is a happy ending. Tyson did not eat dog for dinner, and Richie caught him. I was quite impressed. He was quite not amused, amongst other things like sweaty and exhausted.
Also, we woke up to a poop free living room, yay!
Anyway, baby, cheers to you! Our hero!
Anyhow, I was talking to Adryan yesterday, and I brought up that I think Ambi definitely needs to start getting some more attention, she suggested taking nightly walks. Not a terrible idea, since lord knows Richie and I could also use the exercise. We've both put on 20 lbs since we met, what is THAT about? I mean, I get it. People start dating, they go out to eat, they cook for each other, blah blah. But damn. I hate when I start new relationships, I have to start wearing my fattest jeans again :p Thankfully, this will be my last relationship to ever start, so now we can work on shedding that excess weight. Or, actually, I can. He still is well within his ideal weight range. Although he did have to buy an entire new set of jeans and pants because he "outgrew" his. Hehe. OK, I digress.
So the point is, we decided to take a family walk last night. I gave Richie the choice of pushing Kynlee in her stroller, or walking the dogs. Unless he really was being a complete selfless sweetheart who wanted to give me the easy route, he is crazy. He chose the dogs. Under normal circumstances, I might let him claim ignorance about their behavior, but he's known them for 6 months now, and he knows that they are INSANELY hyper. And they're not small. In fact, their combined weight probably gives him a run for his money.
Anyway, aside from the occasional pull, tug, twist, or switcheroo that they keep pulling on him, we actually get into a nice walk. Kynlee is loving it, Ambi is not actively trying to commit suicide by pulling herself on the leash so hard that she cuts off all oxygen, Tyson is peeing on fire hydrants. We're having a good time. We walk the neighborhood's park exercise path, we stop and walk on balance beams, we house fantasize. After a good 30 minutes, we decide to head home. We turn the corner onto the street perpendicular to our street. There are some kids in the sidewalk, riding bikes, some people sitting in their driveway enjoying the sun....and a dog, without a collar, in the middle of the street.
Oh, dear.
Within .0008 seconds of Tyson and this dog locking eyes, Tyson has Houdini'ed himself out of his collar and is chasing a stray dog down Hoe Down Way. Yes, the street is called Hoe Down. Richie and I exchange looks, and I see the dread in his face as I grab Ambi's leash from him and yell "Run!!" to him. So, yes folks, awkward, clumsy, least-athletic boy in the world (honey, I love you, but you know it's true), hikes up his jeans and starts running after Tyson. With an audience. And me hunched over my stroller trying not to pee myself, whilst also trying to control Ambi, who has gone crazy because her boyfriend has run off. If I had had a video camera, I would kiss myself right now. Tyson chasing dog, grown man chasing Tyson, girlfriend/baby/dog/neighbors watching man chase Tyson, trying not to let him hear the laughter.
There is a happy ending. Tyson did not eat dog for dinner, and Richie caught him. I was quite impressed. He was quite not amused, amongst other things like sweaty and exhausted.
Also, we woke up to a poop free living room, yay!
Anyway, baby, cheers to you! Our hero!