People's Palace Valentine's Day: Lord Richard Cyher - Rahl's Valentine Message to Darken Rahl
Valentine's Day Greeting from Richard Cypher-Rahl, to his brother, Darken Rahl, addressed to whatever Mord'Sith temple the former Lord Rahl might be taking refuge in at the moment.
Well, here we are back at the People's Palace, Bro, your old stomping grounds. Just got back from the Pillars of Creation - Mission completed - Stone of Tears found, Keeper defeated, Kahlan and I can get it on and the world is saved.
BTW - Thanks for sending all those Mord'Sith. They gave their lives for a good cause. I heard you revealed my destination to Nicci, but not willingly - sorry about those burns BTW. Hope you're feeling better.
You wouldn't believe what Nicci did to my BB Kahlan, but we'll never have to worry about that evil sorceress again. Too bad about my super powerful Han, though. Grandpa was a little peeved that I never got it back from her before she died. I wonder what ever happened to it? Oh, well, that's water under the bridge.
Now that I'm sort of at a cross-roads in my life about becoming Lord Rahl and everything, I've been thinking about you and me and having lots of feelings.
Darken, two years ago I didn't even know who you were and then - BOOM - I was supposed to kill you. Then you were like this invisible boogeyman who was never real to me, except for the damage that you left in your wake. You weren't a person - you were just a, a thing; an evil force I was destined to destroy.
Then, when I did finally meet you, well, honestly - it was more than a little humiliating.
First, you, like, totally, caught me by surprise.
Then, you had to introduce yourself by being all smirky, and 'I'm honored' and blah, blah, blah. By that time I'd figured out who you were - ALL RIGHT!
But I got it together, Sword of Truth unsheathed, glowing all red with my rage. I was ready to kill my arch enemy.
Then we had to do this silly crossing swords thing like we were dueling in a gentlemen's club or something. What was that all about ? I just wanted to kill you and rescue my BB. But now I know that you had something else in mind.
Oh, and BTY, Darken, just for the record, the chest/vest/dress - a little garish, and completely wasted on me.
I was so busy with my polished fighting moves that I didn't even notice your toned, hard-muscled arms or glistening chest - AT ALL!
Wow, what a fight that was! You parried my every move, and even managed to evade my patented "leap of doom from a high point" that always exposes my most vulnerable manly parts to whoever happens to be battling me at the moment.
Nobody had prepared me for how physically skilled you were as a warrior. Everybody just wanted to blab on and on about all the magic stuff - speaking of which, that stunt you pulled on me was totally not cool. In Westland, we had a word for it - CHEATING.
Just saying that I would totally have won that fight - OK?
I don't know why I hesitated to run you through. Maybe you were never really there at all. Maybe I'll never know. At some point though, it did start to sink in that something strange was going on.
And then you were -
Behind me!
And that really pissed me off! Because I had been so close to fulfilling the prophecy and you had cheated. But would I have killed you if I had really had you at my mercy? Now - after everything that's happened, I don't like to think about it. Because, knowing what I know now, what would 'winning' have even meant?
Of course, even in victory, you had to rub it in - Smirkyface!
Gloating, twirling the Sword or Truth around in front of my face, chaining me up in front of my BB Kahlan and threatening to confess me. You have the gift of gab, Darken, but sometimes, thank the Creator, you really don't know when to shut up.
Looking back on this now, I wonder what it was that you really wanted from me. Did you see me as the enemy you wanted to destroy, or the brother you wanted to love you - or both? Maybe you didn't even know yourself at the time.
Thanks to your big mouth, my BB Kahlan went into the Con Dar ragey thing, or I would have been your slave forever.
I still wonder at how you were able to get out of that room alive when she turned everyone against you. Got to admit - I was pretty impressed. Still am. I've learned you're a good man to have at my side in any fight, Darken. It's trusting you to stay at my side that's the problem.
And, OH THE BLUE FLAMES!!! I don't have my Han, and you don't have magic anymore, and now I'll never know how do the blue flames. I was so jealous of you being able to appear and disappear in blue flames, Darken!
After that everything happened so fast. We were at West Granthia and you were burnt to a crisp. I won't lie. I didn't mourn your death, only that the manner of it tore open the veil between the world of the living and the Keeper.
I didn't know then you were my brother. I didn't know much more than I did before, only that if you hadn't died, there would have been an icky future that red hot pincers applied to every part of my body could never make me reveal to you. Also - Kahlan would kill me if I told.
But, Darken, you never went away, did you? You just kept popping back up from the Underworld, and, once in awhile, I'd pop down into the Underworld and we'd have a few words. I can't say our relationship improved a whole lot during those months. You served the Keeper, I wanted to save the world from the Keeper. That Mark of the Keeper thing didn't help - that sucker hurt!
Once Denna killed me, and you made me the baneling offer which I refused. I was right to do it, but I haven't forgotten what you said - about the people I've killed, that in my way, I also served the Keeper, that my hands aren't entirely clean. I haven't done the evil that you have, Darken, but you've made me ask questions about myself that Kahlan and Zedd never have. Maybe that's what brothers are for - even when they drive you crazy.
When you popped up and blackmailed us into bringing you back, I was infuriated, yet there was a small part of me that wanted to believe you, that wanted to give you a second chance.
Then for a brief time it was just the two of us - you and me - talking together, eating together, fighting together, having each other's back. I kept you alive until Zedd arrived; and just between us, Darken, I wasn't JUST worried that you would tell the Keeper about the Stone of Tears. I KNEW you would tell Him, of course. You would have no choice. But I also just wanted you to live and to stay with us, and to show that eventually, maybe, we could really be brothers.
This move is so flawless, Darken. I secretly recorded it, and watch it whenever my BB Kahlan is out of the room.
So - here we are, Darken. I'm at the Palace that used to be your home. You're Creator-knows-where. I hope this message reaches you, because I want you to know how I feel. I have so many reasons to hate you. You have reasons to hate me. But, despite everything else, we're brothers, and even though you deserted our Merry Band, you DID send us help and lost Garen and her sisters in doing so.
It sounds silly, and Kahlan and Cara would make fun of me, but I worry about you all alone out there. Sometimes I wander around the palace thinking about the stories you told me about growing up here, and I see you as a little boy here and wonder what it might have been like. Sometimes I imagine you sitting at your window being all sad, lonely and emo.
I think there's a place for you here, Darken, if you aren't too proud to take it. It's your home, after all, and I need somebody to show me around. I've lost track of the number of times I've gotten lost in this place.
Come home and let's try to be brothers.
I'm not good with poems or songs or any of that stuff, but my BB Kahlan and I have our special songs that we like to share. I found this one the other day that sort of expresses my feelings about my relationship with you, brother - in a totally masculine way.
Our special song
And, Darken, wherever you are - Happy Valentine's Day!
Well, here we are back at the People's Palace, Bro, your old stomping grounds. Just got back from the Pillars of Creation - Mission completed - Stone of Tears found, Keeper defeated, Kahlan and I can get it on and the world is saved.
BTW - Thanks for sending all those Mord'Sith. They gave their lives for a good cause. I heard you revealed my destination to Nicci, but not willingly - sorry about those burns BTW. Hope you're feeling better.
You wouldn't believe what Nicci did to my BB Kahlan, but we'll never have to worry about that evil sorceress again. Too bad about my super powerful Han, though. Grandpa was a little peeved that I never got it back from her before she died. I wonder what ever happened to it? Oh, well, that's water under the bridge.
Now that I'm sort of at a cross-roads in my life about becoming Lord Rahl and everything, I've been thinking about you and me and having lots of feelings.
Darken, two years ago I didn't even know who you were and then - BOOM - I was supposed to kill you. Then you were like this invisible boogeyman who was never real to me, except for the damage that you left in your wake. You weren't a person - you were just a, a thing; an evil force I was destined to destroy.
Then, when I did finally meet you, well, honestly - it was more than a little humiliating.
First, you, like, totally, caught me by surprise.
Then, you had to introduce yourself by being all smirky, and 'I'm honored' and blah, blah, blah. By that time I'd figured out who you were - ALL RIGHT!
But I got it together, Sword of Truth unsheathed, glowing all red with my rage. I was ready to kill my arch enemy.
Then we had to do this silly crossing swords thing like we were dueling in a gentlemen's club or something. What was that all about ? I just wanted to kill you and rescue my BB. But now I know that you had something else in mind.
Oh, and BTY, Darken, just for the record, the chest/vest/dress - a little garish, and completely wasted on me.
I was so busy with my polished fighting moves that I didn't even notice your toned, hard-muscled arms or glistening chest - AT ALL!
Wow, what a fight that was! You parried my every move, and even managed to evade my patented "leap of doom from a high point" that always exposes my most vulnerable manly parts to whoever happens to be battling me at the moment.
Nobody had prepared me for how physically skilled you were as a warrior. Everybody just wanted to blab on and on about all the magic stuff - speaking of which, that stunt you pulled on me was totally not cool. In Westland, we had a word for it - CHEATING.
Just saying that I would totally have won that fight - OK?
I don't know why I hesitated to run you through. Maybe you were never really there at all. Maybe I'll never know. At some point though, it did start to sink in that something strange was going on.
And then you were -
Behind me!
And that really pissed me off! Because I had been so close to fulfilling the prophecy and you had cheated. But would I have killed you if I had really had you at my mercy? Now - after everything that's happened, I don't like to think about it. Because, knowing what I know now, what would 'winning' have even meant?
Of course, even in victory, you had to rub it in - Smirkyface!
Gloating, twirling the Sword or Truth around in front of my face, chaining me up in front of my BB Kahlan and threatening to confess me. You have the gift of gab, Darken, but sometimes, thank the Creator, you really don't know when to shut up.
Looking back on this now, I wonder what it was that you really wanted from me. Did you see me as the enemy you wanted to destroy, or the brother you wanted to love you - or both? Maybe you didn't even know yourself at the time.
Thanks to your big mouth, my BB Kahlan went into the Con Dar ragey thing, or I would have been your slave forever.
I still wonder at how you were able to get out of that room alive when she turned everyone against you. Got to admit - I was pretty impressed. Still am. I've learned you're a good man to have at my side in any fight, Darken. It's trusting you to stay at my side that's the problem.
And, OH THE BLUE FLAMES!!! I don't have my Han, and you don't have magic anymore, and now I'll never know how do the blue flames. I was so jealous of you being able to appear and disappear in blue flames, Darken!
After that everything happened so fast. We were at West Granthia and you were burnt to a crisp. I won't lie. I didn't mourn your death, only that the manner of it tore open the veil between the world of the living and the Keeper.
I didn't know then you were my brother. I didn't know much more than I did before, only that if you hadn't died, there would have been an icky future that red hot pincers applied to every part of my body could never make me reveal to you. Also - Kahlan would kill me if I told.
But, Darken, you never went away, did you? You just kept popping back up from the Underworld, and, once in awhile, I'd pop down into the Underworld and we'd have a few words. I can't say our relationship improved a whole lot during those months. You served the Keeper, I wanted to save the world from the Keeper. That Mark of the Keeper thing didn't help - that sucker hurt!
Once Denna killed me, and you made me the baneling offer which I refused. I was right to do it, but I haven't forgotten what you said - about the people I've killed, that in my way, I also served the Keeper, that my hands aren't entirely clean. I haven't done the evil that you have, Darken, but you've made me ask questions about myself that Kahlan and Zedd never have. Maybe that's what brothers are for - even when they drive you crazy.
When you popped up and blackmailed us into bringing you back, I was infuriated, yet there was a small part of me that wanted to believe you, that wanted to give you a second chance.
Then for a brief time it was just the two of us - you and me - talking together, eating together, fighting together, having each other's back. I kept you alive until Zedd arrived; and just between us, Darken, I wasn't JUST worried that you would tell the Keeper about the Stone of Tears. I KNEW you would tell Him, of course. You would have no choice. But I also just wanted you to live and to stay with us, and to show that eventually, maybe, we could really be brothers.
This move is so flawless, Darken. I secretly recorded it, and watch it whenever my BB Kahlan is out of the room.
So - here we are, Darken. I'm at the Palace that used to be your home. You're Creator-knows-where. I hope this message reaches you, because I want you to know how I feel. I have so many reasons to hate you. You have reasons to hate me. But, despite everything else, we're brothers, and even though you deserted our Merry Band, you DID send us help and lost Garen and her sisters in doing so.
It sounds silly, and Kahlan and Cara would make fun of me, but I worry about you all alone out there. Sometimes I wander around the palace thinking about the stories you told me about growing up here, and I see you as a little boy here and wonder what it might have been like. Sometimes I imagine you sitting at your window being all sad, lonely and emo.
I think there's a place for you here, Darken, if you aren't too proud to take it. It's your home, after all, and I need somebody to show me around. I've lost track of the number of times I've gotten lost in this place.
Come home and let's try to be brothers.
I'm not good with poems or songs or any of that stuff, but my BB Kahlan and I have our special songs that we like to share. I found this one the other day that sort of expresses my feelings about my relationship with you, brother - in a totally masculine way.
Our special song
And, Darken, wherever you are - Happy Valentine's Day!