Chip Kidd ~ The Cheese Monkeys: A Novel in Two Semesters
"So, what are you taking?"
At that point I could have said a lot of things--I could have said, "If I don't get the classes I need after waiting five hours in this line, I am taking that clipboard out of your sausage-fingered hands, breaking it into ten thick splinters, and slowly introducing each one of them beneath your cuticles as a way of saying Thanks for herding us like a flock of three thousand Guatemalen dirt pigs into a ventilation-free hall built for three hundred in order to ask us questions we've already answered so many times our minds are jelly and our jaws squeak--an act which has to be covered somewhere in the Bible as punishable by any manner we, in His righteous stead, see fit."
But I didn't.
I mumbled for the umpteenth time that year-long day of that first awful month, my tongue thick with shame,
"Me? Art."
At that point I could have said a lot of things--I could have said, "If I don't get the classes I need after waiting five hours in this line, I am taking that clipboard out of your sausage-fingered hands, breaking it into ten thick splinters, and slowly introducing each one of them beneath your cuticles as a way of saying Thanks for herding us like a flock of three thousand Guatemalen dirt pigs into a ventilation-free hall built for three hundred in order to ask us questions we've already answered so many times our minds are jelly and our jaws squeak--an act which has to be covered somewhere in the Bible as punishable by any manner we, in His righteous stead, see fit."
But I didn't.
I mumbled for the umpteenth time that year-long day of that first awful month, my tongue thick with shame,
"Me? Art."