my names sarah ...and i have a self esteem problem....
mkay so im actually updating and talking and spilling my guts i could say...and doing it in an odd form for me....
im deff. not happy with my life right now.....the good grades is like the best part of the whole thing...my 3.6 was the best thing...im not happy wiht me inside and out...i hate the way i look...i just look at myself in the mirror in the morning and im like what has happend? it takes me forever to just go into the bathroom in the morning and do my hair and makeup cuz i dont want to look at myself....i feel like i have no close friends...i have friends but not a best one its like...i still think of marissa as my best...but shes gotten really close with aly and callie...i just dont feel right hanging out with them..becuase its dance talk and i just feel so unpretty when im with them...so yes...my names sarah and i have a self esteem problem...ive smoked weed twice now in the past 3 weeks...and i hate that ive givin into the peer pressure and done it...but it just gets me outta everything....im just so calm i feel like ive gotten away from my problems for the hour or so that the high lasts....im glad that i fell at choir because it gave me pain and i felt like i needed it...and i cant even count on my grades anymore because i have a fucking d in geometry because i failed a test...i just wish things would go back to what i thought was normal....me being happy with myself...me feeling like i have a best friend...god i dont know....