Mar 26, 2005 07:47
Well, i'm not mad at Serra anymore. i think Ben was right, she was just looking out for me...still wish she hadn't said anything...and Ben, i'm sorry if i made you upset, i didn't mean to, and i'm not mad at you *Hugs the Ben*. Kevin...i still love you with all my heart *nuzzles the Kevin**why are there clothes?***. Paige... no, i don't hate you, and i'm sorry if chaela told you that. it's a lie. you're still my daughter, no matter how much i hate chaela, i'll always love you. i think you know i won't be able to see you again. i'm so sorry. *holds the Paige*. James...still love you, man. Jeremy...every time you say that line, i feel better. thank you. hope to see you later. Jessica...is Jessica. what more needs to be said? you can't not love the Jessica. Btw...you should call me...i'm off all next weekend... Serra...i'm sorry for being mad at you. and yelling. and stuff. i was...upset. but i know why you did it. just...be a little more careful on wording next time, k, sweetie? apparently Ben had the wrong idea. and thanks for all your help...apparently, in the long run, it really did help...thanks for being the brave one...godess knows someone needed to be... Cassy...i love you sweetie. *big kisses* Tarhebus...it was good to see you again. it really was. Maia...*POUNCY* Corey...nice ride. *jealous* Ashley...ahhhh...this is gonna be soooo fun...i can see it now, everything's gonna be playboy bunnies and faeries...lol...and congradulations on getting the job! *waves banner* Minion and Bullet...WHORES! WHYYYYY???? *hears Jessica cracking up* Angie...sorry i couldn't make the concert, i would have gone if you could have given me a little advanced warning...but thank you so much for the invitation.
i miss you all...
AHHHHH! Virginia...going back to three months ago...don't EVER take it on yourself to mistakingly tell your friends that i am single AGAIN...grrr...sigh...to the rest, let me explain...
well, since the famed fight, a good deal of people decided i was single, or at least, very likely to become, without my knowing it. one of these was my co-worker, Virginia, who told a friend of hers about this wonderful girl who's so miserable and needs help (wonderful girl being unaware of all of this). thought she'd be cute, tell him to go visit her at work. and so he does. decides he's infatuated with said "wonderful girl". decides to stop by EVERY DAY FOR TWO WEEKS. follows me around work. first time he meets me, quote, "AHHH, IT'S LIKE WE'RE SOUL MATES" (only thing he knows of me at this point being my name, the fact that i work at wal-mart, i like weapons and video games) ((and by the way i am so fed up with that line...you all have no idea...)) finally sink it into his head...i love my boyfriend, and have less then no intrest in him. Well, as all this stopped when i got him to stay the hell away from me second week of january, why am i bringing it up now? because he stopped in yesterday to stare at me as i was working my register. just stood there. finally had to acknowlage his presence. "Hello, Ryan." "Hi, Vanessa. i just thought you should know...i signed up for the armed forces and they're shipping me out. but it's gonna be ok, because i'm gonna write to you every day, here." at which point, i start laughing until i have tears rolling down my face. lol i can hear jessica's comment now...something in referance to mayo, i'm sure.
oh, yeah...and why is there white hair dye in the back of my car??? that's worrying Kevin too. don't ask me...i kinda found it there. i mean, yes, i used to talk about it, as a joke, but why'd you leave it in the car? and there's no other color lying with it. just two boxes of white hair dye. techically it's blonde, but like, pure white blonde. essentially straight bleaching. *curls in corner...what are you going to do to me...**hears insane laughter...***mildly frightened****
write with a friend, it's interesting. use same style, have different perspectives, stories... here's something for creative writing...wish i could remember the sign on name for the damn class...*frustration*
surrounded by everyone
but i feel so alone
folding my wings
won't heal the holes
hiding from the light
that burns my eyes
curled in this place
of utter darkness
protecting all others
while i cannot heal my own pain
the loneliness of being alone
hidden from the world
where only my shadow can save me
n/s
for the love of a rose
whose touch is death
and the laughter of a child
i have never known
betrayed by all i love
but now the butterfly
is higher then ever before
because god is dead
and can no longer deny me my skies
whispers of the name
now inspire different meanings
as somewhere, along a forest path
there is a waterfall, a stream, a rock
no one can ever remove
n
glimmers of light in dark corners
eyes glowing in the dark
friend, now, no longer foe
she sees what i cannot
hidden power
cover my nakedness
come to me
you are safe here
i can shield you from the world
just ask
tears unseen, on the inside
but even there
it can't rain all the time
n/s
trust me
they see the sword
but not the dagger
i can still save you
i know you hear me
unfurl your wings
smile and relax
hear my voice
i have returned
everything will be alright
go to sleep
s
you don't know what's missing
i hold you as she leaves
she's not for you anyways
angel in my arms
wish you would believe me
with those eyes?
how could you be anything else?
don't go looking for love
i've been here the whole time
it's really ok
nothing's changed
i'm still here
n
can you remember me?
or did i not matter?
you hurt me so
why have i returned?
because love never dies
the pain in your tears long ago
brought me back to you
i wish you'd stop crying
i'm here now
the rain will stop soon
see? the sun is coming out
here he is, go play
now i have work to do
s
go off into the night
i know you'll return
it'll be ok
nothing lasts forever, they say
but that's alright
because we all know about rules
they were made to be broken
i can see you tomorrow
and these arms will hold
the love they need
to exist
n
love you peoples miss you byes