(no subject)
ok so i thought being suspended would be kinda fun...doing what i want all day when my parents arnt home...no definatly not...it effing sux. if there one thing i regret its taking that weed from brad...now im suspended, i cant go to competition, not even as someone who just watches, they think i need a counslor becuz im depressed...im definatly not. i just sit at home being bored all day and i have to get a drug and alcohol test...im not worried but its just go dumb. i miss all my friends..i miss emily like crazy and i miss jodie and heather like whoa, and i even kinda miss cheerleading. all i wanna do right now tho is go snowboarding with emily cuz that doesnt have ne thing to do with school so its like all i can do but im still grounded from 2 weeks ago and it sux. i miss her so much! i just wish it was
i miss goin snowboarding with emily, chico and styles 3 times a week. i wish things were like they used to be... when i didnt get in trouble for stupid things...its like i act like i just dont care ne more when really i do. i just love the way it used to be and not that i wanna be in 8th grade again...i just want it to be like that... when chico had parties every weekend and they were innocent fun, when my parents trusted me, when i didnt get in trouble for stupid mistakes. i miss when me and emily were they only girls at the poker parties and got bored out of our minds and when chico and scottie yelled at me and em for changing the radio station...haha that was always funny, when i didnt go 3 days with out seeing emily or having her spend the night. i miss going to the basketball/volleyball games and wrestling matches after school with chico, styles and the 7th graders and walking to rudys and little ceasers and dairy qeen with my friends after school. i miss going to depot park with styles and devon everyday and falling off the big gate thing becuz i thought styles was behind me haha... i wont forget that! i miss going to clarkston el with dan and styles late at night and getting taco bell like 3 times a week and going shopping with emily and her mom like every weekand. i miss being with my friends 24/7 and being a "good girl". i miss walking home in the rain and getting picked up by chicos mom cuz she was worried. i miss beans coming to our lunch table asking us stupid things. i miss it all even tho i love being in the hs i just wish that i thought b4 i acted sometimes. and as i look back at my eighth grade year i relize that all my memories have to do with either styles or emily. i miss the three of us being together all the time. i sometimes wish me and styles were just friends and i could talk to him like how i did last year and i wish emily could be with all the time like last year. and i dont want you guys to read this and be like "omg rachel i thought u loved partying at sandys and i thought u loved getting in trouble and living like u were dying" i do but i wish i could do both at the same time...like some weekends sandy parties fer sure and other party in chicos back yard. and dont get me wrong i love my ninth grade year but i loved eighth grade year too. and i wish things could be like they were back when.......