You're Almost Done
Food might be a good idea, but when have I ever been a big fan of food? Surely it is overrated. Plus, if I get up from this computer you know what, scratch that. I don't think I can get up. It feels as though small gnomes with pick axes are working dilligently away at the inside of my head and there might be some vicious rodents knawing through the tendons and muscle fibers in my left shoulder. In short, I need an aspirin, or a nap, or to be shot. Quite possibly all three. I didn't realize how badly my arm hurts until I sat down and started writing this entry.
Yesterday, they did my MRI, which almost sent me into hysterics. Oh, I did mention I'm claustrophobic, didn't I? I knew that, but not how bad a claustrophobe I am until they stuck me into the tube and the horrid beeping and grinding noises started. Also, we added another extra-special fear of mine; for some reason we decided it would be a good idea to tie me down. To help me keep my arm in place, of course. Perfectly normal proceedure, you understand. We always do that.
I AM HORRIBLY AFRAID OF BEING TIED OR STRAPPED. I am quite serious. Anything restricts my movement, and paranoia sets in. I don't even like bondage in bed. Oh, you want me to cuff you, peachy, I don't care. Happy to do it. But if you want to cuff me, forget it. No way, commrade. Not me.
So you can imagine how much fun it was for me to strapped down in a small, enclosed space. There's not enough oxygen. What if she can't get me out? I can't see anything but the lights directly over my face, and those poorly, because I have no glasses. My hands are tied down. Could I claw my way out of straps I can't even see? And if I can get out of the straps, how am I going to get out of the tube. I can't shimmy down, that block she put under my knees would stop me doing that. What about up? Can I go up? Is there an opening at the top? What if I reach it and there's no opening? What if there is and opening and then I can't climb over the MRI machine to get back to the door?
Oh, that was a fun half hour.
I think I shall finally venture down to the cafeteria and purchase some coffee and something at least vaguely similar to food. I swear, it's like prison food here. I may have to eat a hot dog. That's the best food there is here. I'm cringing, aren't you?
At least they have good coffee. And the cafeteria is big, and there are no restraints.