"This is gonna sound like a bad joke, But momma I fell in love again"

Jan 15, 2009 00:05

I am so sick and tired of falling in love. Why me? Anyone that has been around me knows that I am extremely independent. I don't need a guy. Period. End of story, do not pass go, do not collect $200.

I feel like a whore. I see people who have had boyfriends for months and years at a time, and the longest 'official' boyfriend I've had lasted a little less than a month.

Come on, really?
Can't I pick anyone right for me? 
Am I even supposed to be dating?

Person after person I've told I was waiting til after highschool to date again because "there is no point to dating before then." But what if I found that one person? The one person that is so noticeably my match that wherever we go we're asked whether or not we're dating. The person that my family has adopted as one of their own, and the person that I have spent every day with for the last week and a half.

Shit. I hate this. I feel petty and pathetic. I feel completely superficial and immature. I feel selfish.

I wish I could see the future clearly. Just a glimpse. Just enough to avoid heartbreak and pain. Yeah... that would be great.

And for the record, void my last post. I wasn't in my right mind.

Sincerely,
Broken

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