(no subject)
I think its common knowledge i hate my job.
BUT! You know what i realized i really like about my job?
all the shits homeless people take.
yeah. i was never much of a down-towner and never really put much thought into what homeless people did when they went brown town. i assumed they just shit in a gas station restroom floor or the walls of a Ross bathroom stall.
but nope.
it seems that they (or one very well fed homeless person) shit around the place hiding fist sized nuggets of depression in bushes all day and night long.
everyday on my walk from my car to and from work its like a twisted stinky egg hunt finding them suckers. you can see me spotting out little piles of shit wheres waldo style...happy as fuck.
except maybe in the morning. sometimes they are fresh and my stomach is still waking up...and yeah... i cant take that smell.
its crazy too when then later in the day i get out and the pile is COVERED in flies. like wing to wing. it makes the shit look like its covered in diamonds. and then they freak out when i pass by and they all get off at the same time. it looks kinda cool. like when they show a flower bloom in fast forward. or like when birds fly out of trees at the same time.
yeah. like that. but with flies....on shit.
the best shit story i got though is i was getting out of work, hot ass day, and im walking behind a lady and we cross the street. im looking down because im going for a little curb hop onto the sidewalk and i can HEAR the lady kick a good palm sized rock out of the way. but then from my peripherals i see the rock breaks. so i look at it quickly because im like "wtf is up with this lady and her rock crushing legs?!"
and guess what i see....
a giant sun hardened. petrified turd!
it was baked for so long in the sun the thing turned into a ROCK!!!
i didnt even know that could happen!!!!!!!
well needless to say i laughed which only fucked me up because it caused me to suck in the pure soul of the turd. which i guess was out for vengeance for being entombed in there because it hit my nostrils so hard the bottom of my eyes fucking stung.
okay i think thats enough shit talk. i was just going to say i didnt like my job. and then this happened. i guess you could say my mind took....a.....SHIT!?!?!?!?!
yeah. im done.
BUT! You know what i realized i really like about my job?
all the shits homeless people take.
yeah. i was never much of a down-towner and never really put much thought into what homeless people did when they went brown town. i assumed they just shit in a gas station restroom floor or the walls of a Ross bathroom stall.
but nope.
it seems that they (or one very well fed homeless person) shit around the place hiding fist sized nuggets of depression in bushes all day and night long.
everyday on my walk from my car to and from work its like a twisted stinky egg hunt finding them suckers. you can see me spotting out little piles of shit wheres waldo style...happy as fuck.
except maybe in the morning. sometimes they are fresh and my stomach is still waking up...and yeah... i cant take that smell.
its crazy too when then later in the day i get out and the pile is COVERED in flies. like wing to wing. it makes the shit look like its covered in diamonds. and then they freak out when i pass by and they all get off at the same time. it looks kinda cool. like when they show a flower bloom in fast forward. or like when birds fly out of trees at the same time.
yeah. like that. but with flies....on shit.
the best shit story i got though is i was getting out of work, hot ass day, and im walking behind a lady and we cross the street. im looking down because im going for a little curb hop onto the sidewalk and i can HEAR the lady kick a good palm sized rock out of the way. but then from my peripherals i see the rock breaks. so i look at it quickly because im like "wtf is up with this lady and her rock crushing legs?!"
and guess what i see....
a giant sun hardened. petrified turd!
it was baked for so long in the sun the thing turned into a ROCK!!!
i didnt even know that could happen!!!!!!!
well needless to say i laughed which only fucked me up because it caused me to suck in the pure soul of the turd. which i guess was out for vengeance for being entombed in there because it hit my nostrils so hard the bottom of my eyes fucking stung.
okay i think thats enough shit talk. i was just going to say i didnt like my job. and then this happened. i guess you could say my mind took....a.....SHIT!?!?!?!?!
yeah. im done.