(no subject)
so i dont exactly know what to do. i really like him. like a lot. but its weird because we are such good friends. i dont know if i should just overcome my weirdness and stop being selfish or what. but its very very weird. Hes not exactly what im looking for but hes very close to it. It doesnt seem like hes as outgoing and fun as he used to be. idk. what should i do? And then, i feel like my best friends arent my best friends. Well just particularly one of them. She just been, like, bitchy towards me and only me and it makes me so mad. Shes never acted like this before but i guess im just going to have to get used to it. school sucks. i hate it. i hate getting up in the mornings. i cant wait until it is over. ahhh. i think [he] has a lot to do with my problems. i wish i could just block him completely out of my mind. everytime im not thinking about him and i think i have him completely blocked out he randomly pops up or calls. is it so much to ask for happiness. i dont understand why everything is getting in my way of that. i hate being alone. i just hate it. especially now that someone was like lurking outside my bedroom window and probably watching me because they opened my window. that or they were trying to get it. now im scared out of my mind of everything mentally and physically.