and if I droped one drop of blood, you would catch it...
So...today is going kind of shitty. With Lynn, and with Sean, and everything going on in my head. WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO WITH MYSELF? I feel like I don't belong right now, that I'm causing more and more drama than there already is. Maybe I should just drown myslef in a huge lake, somewhere where nobody can find my body. That's where I would commit suicide. But, talking about suicide isn't gonna keep me from cutting myself. But honestly I wouldnt cut on my arms anymore...I would cut on my legs, or one my stomach, or ankels. Somewhere other than my arms, everyone can see my arms. I would actually probably cut on my arms if I was pissed off...but I don't know. I thaught that today was actually gonna be a fucking OK day, and every one is all fucked up, and pissed off. Why the hell do I have to go through this? There is too much fucking drama in my life right now, and I'm not telling anybody what is hurting right now, and there is somethings that nobody knows but me. I have no idea why I am saying this in my live journal..but I really don't give a fuck right now. Most of the time it's not even me that is making me crazy... it's them, everyone around me. I NEED TO FUCKING GET AWAY FROM THIS PLACE...GO SOMEWHERE WHERE I BELONG! Where do I belong? Maybe I belong somewhere lying on tne floor, dead, with a razor stuck in my arm, and my arm bleeding for my wrist to to my shoulder. But, then again, I don't know right now...but what I do know is...If I am still pissed at lunch, I am gonna do something, that I will probably regret doing... Well then again, I won't regret doing it to myself, I would regret putting more drama in other peoples lives. So, I wouldnt tell anybody if I did it, and if somebody asks, I will pretend I didn't hear them or something...I don't know.............FUCKKKKK!!!!
Cora
Cora