[Robo-Ky is sitting in a plush, velvet-covered antique chair wearing a fancy robe, as he sips motor oil. There's a fireplace crackling off to the side and a wall-sized sign behind him with a picture of the Nagasaki A-Bomb's mushroom cloud, with the text "You deserved this too." He pulls out a small pipe and begins blowing bubbles out of it.]
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Now then, humans, in general, kind of suck. Kind of suck a lot.
I mean, if you shoot them, they bleed and if they bleed too much, they die. And they can't just melt the leaks shut because the fire "hurts".
Fucking pansies, the lot of them.
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Between 60,000 and 80,000 people were killed by both the immediate blast the ensuing fallout.
And they all deserved it.
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except all the Japanese are kinda dead in his world, or they've been turned into biochemical weapons, and Kanda himself probably isn't even Japanese anyway.
thus.
Kanda's just going to raise an eyebrow, recline in his chair, and continue staring at the talking box-- er. television.
so tell me, Robo-Ky. why are the Japanese so inferior?]
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Humans are inherently inferior to robots because they're squishy and made of fat and meat. Fat is very flammable and meat is easily smashed and broken and also gets old and smells bad.
Robots don't do that. Sure, we can rust, but we have chemicals to fix that. Humans just smell bad. Also they can't fix themselves.
And the Japanese are much smaller and really kind of fucked up in the head, you know? Also they smell the worst when you burn them.
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..I do not smell that bad. [do I? huh. never really paid attention to that.
continues watching. this is kind of amusing, actually.]
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But in a good way.
Here's some now.
[OH GOD LOOK AWAY.]
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Watching.
Laughing.
So much.]
This is fucking gold.
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Good question!
The answer is "rape".
[Robo-Ky pulls out a chalkboard with obscene drawings.]
If the Asian individual is male, find a woman and attempt to rape her. If he helps, he is probably Japanese.
If it is a woman, attempt to force yourself on her sexually. If she says "no" a lot but actively participates anyway, Japanese.
Please note that this won't actually work 100% of the time, but hey, no setbacks anyway, yeah?
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What do you mean he's insane. Get the fuck out.]
Ke-hehe-eeheheh... Oh, this is wonderful.
[Contemplating trying to find Robo-ky and be on his show.]
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Like this one.
[Yes, that's a photo of Baiken. This time an actual one, taken in her shower.]
Do not let them fool you. After screwing them, you should immediately taken ten showers.
And then do it again.
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Glasses? Fetish. Underage girls? Fetish. Completely impossible anatomy? Fetish.
Underaged girl with glasses and impossible anatomy? Japanese Fetish.
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[She eyes herself quizzically for a moment. Not underage or myopic, no, but still...]
...I bet I'd be huge in Japan!!
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Fucking big in Japan.
No idea why. Cats never struck me as inherently sexy, but the Japanese seem to think so!
[Yes, he is encouraging her, unknowingly.]
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