ugh
everything is just so blah lately. there is nothing exciting and i pretty much hate everything. school sux big time. i think i hate it more than ever right now. i am so miserable. even things with my love are totally lame right now. he is in a pickle and im sposed to help him or something, but he doesnt talk to me so i dont kno how that is gonna work. i dont think he really likes me. i think all he wants is a bj since that is wat he keeps asking me for. everything sux. im always tired, bitchy, and in pain one way or another. then again all these feelings could just be cuz im on my period. well i get to watch the oc tonight and i will probly get too emotionally into it cuz of how bad things suck right now. i havent seen my dad in over two weeks. how horrible is that? its not totally my fault tho. he called me but only to get my brothers cell phone number. it kinda makes me sad that he didnt even wanna talk to me. he will probly call tonight or tomorrow night of course once i already have plans so then i feel guilty for turning him down. i hate that my parents are divorced. its f-ing gay. i kno i should probly get over it considering it was eleven years ago, but that makes it even worse. i have never gotten to do like family things. just with me, my brother, my mom, and my dad. everytime i wanna go to a family dinner i have to choose which one i wanna go with. people think its cool cuz i get two christmases, but it actually kinda sux cuz i dont get to have one christmas with my family. ugh i hate this. i think all this is just cuz im on my period cuz i feel depressed cuz i havent seen my dad. not that it matters cuz even when i do spend time with him he talks on his cell phone or he ignores me while he watched tv. i think he is scared that im gonna tell him that i am pregnant or something. im gonna go to a thing at school now, o joy i get to go back. bye.