oh tap...

[broadwaybaby141]

so tonight i walked into tap's room in pj shorts and a t-shirt and she says to me "wow, you've really gained alot of weight...i can see it in your legs". i just told her to shut up and walked away, but i know that she's completely right. i wouldn't say i've gained alot of weight, but i've definetly gained my far share of weight. i am by no means calling myself fat, but this is the heaviest that i've ever been and i don't really like how it feels. for the first time in my life, i am very uncomfortable with my body. i would like to get back to the weight that i was at when i started college...that was a very healthy, reasonable, and comfortable weight. i'm not loaded down with alot of classes this semester so i really need to start working out. i have access to rowan's gym completely free of charge and i also have a gift certificate to the gym downtown that my dad never used. i know that i really need to start eating better too. at william paterson, shelby and i would order out or get food from the w and then just sit on our beds and eat it.
lots of greasy/fattening foods + a lack of physical activity = weight gain.

i'm extrememly serious about loosing a little weight and getting myself in shape. with spring and summer coming up, i want to be completely confident and comfortable wearing a pair of shorts, a tank top, and even a bathing suit.

this is not about me thinking that i'm fat or trying to look like all of the other skinny girls...those things could not be further from the truth. i just want the confidence back that i had when i started school and, hold me to, i'm going to do everything in my power to make this happen.