Febuary 3rd......one fucked up nite!!!!
So Cale came to get me in the morning. I woke up to her sit beside me on the sofa looking at me. I was like ok I got to get my shit and we can go. I went in tia's room and told her I was leaving as I was getting my tee,jacket and belt. She was like ok bye. I walked out and was like I got to up kyla shirt cause I borrowed another one. I had a feeling tia was talking to cale. I told Breanna bye then went down stair to see that I was right.Tia got up and was walking around...I was like ok we are leaving now..hugs and we left. I told cale about everything that happened and how creepy that chic was and what she said. I looked at cale and was like omg I love her so much and Im so glad im with her. I kissed her. We drove all the way to neenah. But we were going to go to the mal first because I have no clothes with me and her work party you have to dress up. SO i was excited to be there with her and going shopping. But we got food first it was good and we had fun.It was some country place....cherry pepsi.I liked it alot but after we eat I wanted to sleep then go shopping but I knew we had no time so I was like a power nap would be good.So we got to her place and I layed down we just layed there and we talked. I was just so happy about this day.As we were talking I was looking at her thinking gosh I love her alot. But then she told me she had to tell me something I was like WHAT?!She told me how when she was in the bathroom peeing that amanda walked in there and got in her face and told her that she was wanted to kiss her.But she pushed her off and walked out and meg came in the bathroom and she made out with meg.I was hurt that she wait this long to tell me since she "tells me everything".SHe was like I'll go that again. I was out of my mind thinking wow she got me all the way here and is gonna tell me something like that.I had a odd feeling about her every since they started talking.I was hurt but I was going to let it ruin everything so I passed it off like it was nothing.I was telling how I want to take a shower.So I went in to the shower as I went in I heard that iming going on I was like who are you tlaking to she was like amanda she is having some problem..I was like ok. I wasnt trying to let it piss me off. I got out of the shower and the clothes issue happened. Cale told me that we coulndnt go shopping...I was like omg great what am I going to wear. she is shorter than me but we wear simliar sizes.But everything I was wearing was too small or too short making me feel shity about myself. She was you want to get something at the store. I was like yeah if we have time. I was so happy....find something that will actually fit!!!But then Holly cam in and was like what going on. Cale like we were going to the store to pick something out for britt. She was like maybe I have something...I was thinking "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! Cale told me we were going shopping and we're fucking going shopping."But we didnt I tried on pants after pants...feeling like a fat ass. I was ready to be like I dont even what to go even though I've been planning on it forever.But I didnt want to look dumb.Then cale is like if you dont want to go we dont have to. I was thinking you have been making sure Im coming to this since december..We are going. So cale brought me some of holly's skirt. I found one that fits and a top and shoes. I had an out fit but nothing for my hair. So cale got dressed and went and got some gel. She came back we got all ready and we were off. I felt stupid wearing a skirt when it just snow earlier that day. We got to the place and I had a blast!!!! I was so happy. Cale was so cute. I even had an ok time with Jesika (Cale's friend who I hate with a passion...I think she is scared of lesbians). Boy I didnt know what the night had planned for me. I drank alot of cranberry and vodka drinks. It drunk but not sloppy. After having a great time. We went to get some Hardeez. I was wanting fries soooo bad. As we pulled in to the drive thru, cale told me that she had to tell me something else about what she told me before. I was like plz dont tell me she kissed her. She was like we kissed and I felt my body fill with soooooo much anger. I flipped out!!! Screaming at her about everything!!! How could she keeps this from me and act like I was being shady to her all week. everything we talked on the phone we would give me shit about not having any time for her and how our relationship is bad and shit like this all week and then we I get here. SHe first kept it from me for a week,made me feel like a bad gf, and the lied about the kiss. I was gonna hit her. I was crying and screaming and hitting her dashboard. I felt like everyone in the world was trying to hurt. I felt alone. I was done with her and everything!!!How could I go from loving someone so much to hating them. Why did she lie?She made me feel like shit for not tell her about tia's party and I didnt do anything. But she kept this from me. I was so hurt. I screamed at her as much as I could till I was saying the same thing over and over again. Then I stopped talking to her. The ride home was quiet as I stared out the window. We got to her apt I threw off all my clothes and put my tee and jeans on and i went to her comp and imed amanda telling her how she is dead to me and I hate her. I went to sleep on the couch I didnt want to be around her.She knew about everything and she fucked me over the worst. She was the only thing I had good in my life. The only one I could run too. What do you do when you loose your everything?I was out there and she asked if would sleep in the bed with her. I didnt want to but I did.She asked if I want to go home and I was like yeah.She was begging me to stay but I knew I need to get away from all of this.I wanted to go home soo bad. I hated being house cause everyone hates me there and treat me like Im not wanted there..so when I come to my gf's I feel wanted and loved...but i feel alone and betraded.I didnt want to talk about anything. I want sleep and to wake up and none of this to happen.But when I woke up I felt the same angry. She asked if I want to go home and I was like I dont know. She asked if I was going to cleary's show. I like cleary...he didnt do anything wrong. She acted like thing were ok but they werent..i dont know when they will be the same. As we drove to his show sheasked if there was anything she could do. I told her call her and tell her you dont want to be friends with her.She did. She told her that she told me about the kiss and that I was pissed. Amanda said I didnt think you were going to tell her about the kiss.WOW....I thought this is someone who want my gf to be her best friend and she didnt think she would tell me. I guess cale was giving her reason to thinking she was telling her everything. I was pissed. Then drama broke on the phone and I called that bitch.She told me that she didnt think it was a big deal since everyone was making out with everyong. I was like yeah Infront of everyone...no went to the bathroom to make out with anyone...that was just fucked. I told her how am I supposed to think you just want to be friends with cale...when tell her you want to kiss her.(See... amanda and britt have cheated on each other alot (britt fucked amanda's older sister talk about fucked up).....while amanda has been being "best of friend" with cale she never told her that) We fought then we talked things out. I know it was both of them but still i didnt like amanda from the beginning.We're "cool" again but I dont trust her. I felt so stupid since even amanda's gf knew..and i was hanging out with them all week. Me not knowing shit. I hate people sometimes.But when we were at Cleary's Im acted like nothing was wrong. I dont want him to think something was up.I love her family. After this thing will never be the same for me. I love how she says you'llhave to get over this...and think that everyone is out to get me. Well how can I not think that with having the week that I had. One day I'll be able to laugh about this but not any day soon!!!!!!!!!!!